BEING LATE

One of the scourges common to businesses and friendships is that of people being late. It's not only disrespectful it's bad in every way possible as it lets others down and stops the smooth flow of life itself. If a cog in a watch no matter how big or small stops then it all stops. Similarly if others place a responsibility upon you as an individual then you either uphold it or be forever viewed as one who can't / won't uphold their part of the bargain. And before those who are late perpetually start to wriggle with annoyance 'blame culture' doesn't hold water either. Yes, there are at times mitigating circumstances where even the most die hard and studious person who always arrives early arrives late one day, but the circumstances pertaining to their enforced late arrival can be counted on one hand and are usually very exceptional. We all know of people who just can't keep to time, perpetually late or last minute or whatever besets or befalls them they just have a list of ready made excuses as to why they "had to do this" or "cut it so fine" as not to allow any safe margin whatsoever so pro-occupied with themselves and their thoughts that what is around is either secondary or less important.


The crucial matter for lateness is not traffic, accidents, weather, invasions from Mars and Venues, it's not even the alarm clock not going off for those that deem they need to be there get there, those that have to be there for whatever reason place secondary importance again on the delivery of themselves as it's a chore more than responsibility.  If one is late for work phoning from the "cell phone / mobile phone" doesn't make it all right, it may show a degree of courtesy should one be able to advise of late arrival but it doesn't admonish the responsibility factor nor does it do anything else - you are late - full stop. There is always a cause for lateness over and above circumstances en-route that one cannot help, illness, bereavement, children, etc, but if children are an on-going common cause that's not acceptable as the world doesn't revolve around your problems and it needs resolution.


The causes of lateness are usually of a psychological nature even if it's perpetually cutting it all too fine and not allowing for delays en-route. Are you happy with your work, or are you happy with the destination that you have an appointment with, even if it's the dentist or a hospital appointment, or an interview or a court appearance or whatever it may be. As a member of the human race you have a responsibility not only to yourselves but those around you too, and that has nothing to do with self concocted ego, arrogance and the 'what's in it for me' attitude for if any of these latter aspects creep into your thoughts you have a problem looming large. You ARE the problem. If you don't like where you work or dread work or dislike those who are at your work it speaks volumes about you and not your work. Understandably it's not always that easy to change jobs especially at certain times where the financial climate is weak and jobs are scarce, but if you respect your income no matter what it is then you should uphold who you are otherwise by default you make yourself worthless and that has very bad connotations that will eventually ostracise you by your own volition from many aspects of life.


 Blame culture, lax attitudes, lack of self respect, negative emotions at the forefront of your mind, small mindedness, pre-occupation with yourself, lack of respect for others, lack of purpose, insularity of mind, lack of focus, lack of priorities, etc are all contributory factors as to lateness especially those who are perpetually late. Lazy environments, i.e.people you work or live within who share the same social banal culture and talk about lateness as a topic, which exists and share their lame excuses and think it's clever. Late arrival usually starts with an apology, think about it, starting anything with an apology isn't good it puts you under par before anything has started and it usually lowers concentration often resulting in a lower performance and hurried thoughts which causes mistakes and lack of concentration. In some areas the smallest of mistakes can cause death or mayhem, just because perhaps your position in life isn't so critical it gives you no leeway to take matters into your own hand. You are paid for what you do not what you don't do.

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©John Rushton / The Life Alchemist 2012
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SEPARATING OURSELVES FROM CIRCUMSTANCES

We all fall victim at times to circumstances as they temporarily take over our own will and we thus become an alien to oureselves, this can happen when we have a death in the family, made redundant, diagnosed with a serious condition, have financial problems, etc, they affect directly our way of life and hit hard on our emotional stability. Of course we are not all the same and some people seem to worry about everything whereas others seemingly worry about very little and take whatever comes as it is and deal with it accordingly. There's no right or wrong we are who we are and administer areas of our lives the best we can. Sometimes things stagnate or get worse because we are ignorant and fail to seek help or assistance or advice which is what many do to their detriment. Ego, pride, self smugness etc, tends to creep in and we scorn knowledge that others may have built upon in similar circumatances of others and the possibilities that exist to ease the burden or relieve the mental stress that one has swimming around in their heads. Too many people walk around with the "I know best" attitude not knowing that the options thay have have just been negated because of the lack of clarity and forsight of the self. Carrying problems around in one's mind is not smart, it's not respectable, it's not a pennance for anything of the past, it's not necessary, it doesn't change anything, it doesn't promote anything, it doesn't justify anything, it doesn't preserve your identity and deeds, it doesn't help with the future, it doesn't contribute to your friends and family, it doesn't gain sympathy it grates on others as they look upon you as pityful, it's not a prelude to better things in the future, in short despite the severity of whatever it is you harbour it doesn't lead anywhere positive.
Our attitude towards life is paramount to how we live it, it's the base of all of our thoughts and feelings coming together to present whom we are to the world, our "Shop window", and whilst what lies behind that "Shop window" can vary enormously if the shop window looks and is shoddy, you know yourself you'll walk right on by. Whether it's raining, sunny, cold, snowy, etc, we can choose to be happy and bright, if we once start off the day with "Ohhhhh it's raining" then that's predominantly how the day will be and any other aspect related condition we have chosen will allow our feelings to match it. Those that look at the weather, see its raining and accordingly go forward determined to enjoy the day despite those obnoxious people they dislike at work, and missing the bus, and having to put up with the temporary office bercause of refurbishment, and things not being where they should be, and the party they are going to that evening that they are not too excited about, etc, the day is good and bright and yes they can smile and be civil to anyone regardless of how they are to them.

Failure, fear, loneliness, depression, etc, stem from taking hold of the circumstances around us and absorbing them like a sponge, we internalise them not seeing beyond the now and cogitating upon circumstantial aspects of life that could change or alter in a flash or offer solutuions and alternatives that because we don't know of we revert inwardly with a melancholic feeling. Habits and family traits are often a basic cause of this, the tendencies are if our families are negative then we have a chance to be negative too, and the opposite if our families are positive towards life in general then so are we. However, we all have choices and can directly change towards a positive mode should we really want to. Like "Soap TV" everything revolves around trivia or someone else's problems and smallmindedness, for without smallmindedness there wouldn't be a plot. It's one thing to watch such on television but many live in a smallminded arena in life and their lies their downfall and lack of real potential. It's almost failure in the making, with you feeding the ingredients towards it.    

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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
(These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others),

WHEN IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE

 Much of life is based upon perspectives, ideology, circumstances and situations, and that as we all know can differ radically not only from country to country but from person to person. We often ponder and wonder why someone did this or that or what possessed the government to do this or that because the consequences of such have drastically backfired, etc. We listen to politicians on television and at times with amazement wondering if they are on drugs or perhaps need to be or even are they of this planet, it's often that groups of people change their opinions when engaged in different strata's of life. We hear architects waxing lyrically about buildings with sweeping lines and wooden facades that will age with time and blend in, yet all we see is a clinical cold object with unkempt  faded cladding that appears neglected cold isolated and without any warmth that is an ideal medium to cause repressive thoughts and a home to vandalism and graffiti. We hear local government talk of multi-culturism, yet all we see are swathes of foreigners in enclaves that are the new ghettos and where everyone else keeps away even commerce so it houses alien cultural abnormalities and inbred dysfunctionality and gross isolation and then becomes run down and violence, drugs, poverty, crime and social inability creeps in and then they wonder why it's all happened. A slum run by social services and then that's the beginning of the end if not the end already, designer built problems from lax attitudes, stupid and weak minds.

A lot of life is way beyond what we have any control over, not that we need to give up or admonish ourselves of any responsibility nor keep our opinions to ourselves. Never end up like some politically correct idiot that tries to stymie conversation as opposed to allowing free thought, if others get upset, so be it, it's for them to get over it. Often why people get upset is that the truth hurts so they never actually talk about it themselves or they are by nature inferior and seek compassion by taking sides, it never works, they all eventually die lonely. We don't have to make sense of a great deal in life for we do not have to engage with others ideals, morals, perceptions etc, as long as we keep ourselves in tow and others similarly then the sum of the greater usually wins the day, and fortunately most people adhere to a commonality of good. Logic is a good baseline in life, often people action deeds based on temporary emotions then realise afterwards how pathetic they were at the time but then it's too late. Great statesmen can "see" the difference and utilise appropriate rhetoric to put their points across most people don't have that ability, similarly many politicians don't either unfortunately. There is however a case for tempering logic with emotional tack, as logic often is cold and at times ruthless and whilst on paper it may all work well in reality the physicality of actions often flounder because the humanitarian traits are not taken into account.

We need to understand where our thoughts come from that they are accurate and not just something thrown together based upon biased news from the media or a viral video on YouTube. We need to focus aptly upon ourselves to make sure that we are OK not selfishly but accurately and that our lives are important and not the hub of some plan organised by the government or other heartless body. If it doesn't make sense then you have two options it either isn't accurate or you can't grasp what the bigger picture is all about, and it maybe that you don't understand either. The worst thing you can do however is to make an opinion up just for the sake of it because that will stick with you. If you don't know or prefer not to say then so be it, there's no one who can force you only yourself or your lack of self esteem that makes you feel a lesser person and that should never happen. You are totally entitled to be who you are, even if you are wrong, no one is right all the time ever. If you can't make sense of anything either seek "expert" help / opinion, or move on, but don't deliberate on ignorance as that will throw you into a scenario that clouds both your life and your whole integrity.

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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
 (These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others),

DEEP INGRAINED BELIEFS

Over 85% of our thoughts, feelings, actions, habits stem from our inner self that's almost etched with our stubborn concepts of life, we do much in life without thinking about it,  it just comes automatically and we at times do things almost robotically especially routine or regular stuff. Surprisingly too much of our subconscious though is negative, it swirls around our minds and gets discarded in almost the same instant. Whether we have something substantial to think about or pressing matters that require focused thought or whether we are just routinely going about our daily chores our mind is flushed with both current thoughts and redundant thoughts all battling for attention. That's why at times we think weird or silly or impractical things about something or someone then wonder where it all came from. And whilst we do ponder and deliberate over itemised areas of our conscious we still have running wild as a back drop a whole host of thoughts and related feelings that we literally have to contend with even though we are used to it happening and at times take it all for granted until we feel low then get a headache.  

Many people of religious beliefs suffer from ingrained doctrines and one can hear almost without exception the way they talk almost blinkered to another reality that exists, bringing upon themselves repression, guilt, hardship, lack of love, narrowness, suffering, failure, and much overall unhappiness. Their vision and hearing is selective if not permanently impaired in that they see and hear only what they need to see and hear the rest doesn't exist, hence so much global unrest and thoughtless killings which are anything but Godly. But nearer to home many 'ordinary' people are brought up in an environment of underwhelmed activity and dulled intelligence and their formative years have from the outset been tarnished and for many 'set in' to their personal detriment. It's only education and life that breaks the cocooned mould and allows one to see the bigger picture and understand the microcosm of where they were self shackled into insularity, repression and self persecution.

Some societies also have views put out by their media and some state enterprises too that depict other countries from a re-arranged perspective or even restrict information from other countries. Even becoming more common is Western internal PR which has the Hallmark of deceit being both selective and light on content almost washing over how reality is and how others can't relate to how they are living and how they have been presented by a vision of falsehood. The problem with deep ingrained beliefs such as those prevalent in the Middle East is that nothing good comes about from it, everyone knowing the difference and under pressure living a dual existence saying but not doing for fear of repercussions. Yet at the same time internal pressure builds up like a volcano and once it erupts logic reason and common sense coupled with personal ego let rip and it then becomes a free for all. The likes of the UN or similar play politics and yes it all fails, playing politics doesn't hold any kudos when emotions out rule the self and logic and of course the greed bestowed with undemocratic governments. The same mind that corrupts is the same one that can save and care, it's just that the free will has been tainted by indoctrination of an unstable and unsavoury kind. Where one has free will one has to seek the truth and not a version of it but the real truth and then and this is the hardest part, believe it.

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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
 (These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others),

WORLD SEGREGATION

Whatever your belief, your understanding, your knowledge, your grasp on life there's always more, there's always that bit extra that you don' know of or what doesn't rest comfortably within so you tend to skirt over it and peddle the other stuff that more easily flows off the tongue or the pen. Then of course there is the self bias too, and your religious leanings they have a lot to do with your stability and failure rate, and some of the biggest religions have the biggest predominance of instability and failure, no guesses here. It's important that one understands too where life is taking us otherwise like the vast majority they will just follow and fail then blame everyone else like happens in the Middle East and much of Africa where hysteria is a part of life. It's almost as if wholesale happiness has been eradicated by religion that supports no one and that their God never ever helped anyone ever and where they have less success than all others in the world, they don't deserve it yet bring it on themselves. Believing in something that never happens isn't a way of life it's a sad indictment to indoctrination and nothing more. It also has resolutely massive drawbacks as the world speeds up, and believe what you like things are going to get far worse for many, even if initially nothing will seem to dramatically happen. But like many an illness it's there for a long time until it all of a sudden strikes and then sadly it's all too late.

Even in Western countries there will be enormous changes and structural disruption especially with many migrant families for if integration isn't on their agenda and they seek the status of misplaced persons, i.e. foreigners of identity living in another country then doom will be their only reception in life and the option to do a U turn will not be available as no one will want to know. Chances need to be taken when expedient not when one feel they have the luxury to suite themselves. Life does not carry passengers, nor does it suffer fools, egotists, religious or political stupidity. Whilst our climate is going through a new metamorphosis as it has done many times before, what's happening now is nothing new even if it's outlined to be a man made event. Much of the bias towards global warming and carbon offsetting and the like is commercially and politically backed and will result in the usual corruptness that's self created and failure and mayhem will result. It's not that we shouldn't be better placed and cleaner it's like everything else it's usually left to the incompetent and narrow to do what others don't want to do.

The global political speak of integration is but a facade and rifts, segregation, splitting apart, isolation, multi-level partitions, etc are already taking place by those that can and do and those that don't and can't. There is a definite shift to enlightenment in life a feeling of greater understanding and a knowledge of what 'it's' all about even if it takes into account a degree of a lack of complex understanding also. Evolution isn't a pretty picture outlined by school teachers at primary school, nor New Age Evangelists, nor whet Religious freaks who say what they think they ought to say as apart to what is expedient. It's all about being yourself today more than ever before as that will by default separate you out and allow you to further your cause without the dross of others who want to stifle and control and the inept politically correct who have no purpose in life at all. Blame doesn't have a place in life, even if there is truth in what it purports to be, blame isn't an answer that has impetus to going forward, what's done has been done progress is either moving onwards or rectifying what has happened to a degree, the past cannot be reversed but it can be forward amended. 

Celebrating individuality in today's society is a way or reducing unity, and to celebrate for the sake of it is a profoundness of diminished responsibility by those who have very little vision, understanding and foresight. It produces isolated individuals and communities that are less likely to integrate, to hold on to old ways, to feel negatively different and not be able to communicate with everyone else efficiently, it will separate out to produce outcasts and 'looked down upon' people many of whom will never recover the psychological onslaught. Celebrating diversity is fine for the educated but for third world immigrants they will come from one third world environment to creating another in the west and that will result in a massive "us" and "them" which is in evidence now. Enlightenment is the only way forward, but as politicians are themselves unenlightened little hope of that exists and for the main it will all only get worse in the foreseeable future.

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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
(These blogs are read in over 137 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others),

WHAT DO YOU LOOK LIKE

It may seem strange to say what do you look like, after all we are experts in what we know and feel about ourselves. We know all the little bumps and bits and pieces and which is our best side or maybe we don't even have one. But more than just looking in the mirror and seeing ourselves via a critical eye, others see us as something totally different. With the exception of friends, relatives and possibly those we work with everyone else sees just what they see a person in their own right. Not someone who is slightly overweight or skinny or tall or short, they see a person that they have no other comparison with and one that they have to make an assessment upon. We know who we are but others see a picture that they try and assimilate into a character. Do they look mean, happy, friendly, moodily, surly, quiet, extrovert, approachable, would you trust them, are they dressed nicely or according to the setting of where they are? Do they look presentable, would you like to know them or be associated with them. And would you want to be seen with them with your friends or family etc. Our eyes are the fastest scanners on the planet women have an extraordinary sense of what someone is like, even though they can let themselves down emotionally despite that inner self saying something else.

The thing is do we actually "see" us as others do and the answer is NO we don't. We might come a close second at times but by and large others see a different us, an "us" without explanation or excuses, if we are fat they see a fat person, if we are skinny likewise, if we are badly dressed or unkempt that's how they see us. It doesn't matter whether it's a work picture or a work in the back yard picture, it still tells a story about you and quite an accurate one at that. We exude a status about ourselves that we don't realise, following fashion doesn't denote style, it denotes you "follow" and not develop your own, if you are scruffy it tells a lot about how you prioritise your looks with regards what you do, and in some cases it doesn't matter but then there's the social side to you too and if that looks like it stinks then it probably does. Nothing goes without notice even subliminally we pick up on the nuances and the statements and assess the credentials which are filled in later on - perhaps if one gets any further. Rightly or wrongly this happens many times a day and most people would be surprised to learn if they had to give an account of someone close by or in their office or others give an account of them just what things they would pick up upon.

It doesn't matter if our characters are avant guard, eccentric, dull, conservative, traditional, docile, etc, it will probably suite our overall look as it is an exclamation of us within, although some could well be helped to upgrade as they haven't a clue as to colours or styles etc, however it won't detract from any observation. Our speech, body language further punctuates whom we are as does our eye contact which the is doorway into our world and those talking to us. Of course one could go further but the essence of whom we are resides on that initial glance, and yes we can get it wrong, so if we do we are either reading the wrong messages, seeing something out of kilter or not following up with a general and overall picture, that's why it's so important to get it right from a personal perspective straight away if we are to be judged. Often second chances don't exist and personal excuses running around within your mind are futile as the opportunity to make that first grab contact pales into insignificance of what might have been but wasn't.

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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
 (These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others

HATE AND PERFECTION

More than ever today the young are put under pressure to conform, all the hollow talk of allowing them to being individuals is rubbish as once they start to differ from the 'norm' they are soon reprimanded because the "parents" or "social class" feels threatened and frightened and have doubts themselves, not to mention are at times totally ignorant about the whole scenario. Parents can be the best thing for any young person or they can be the worse thing ever and cause their children untold stress anxiety and a repressive early life especially the very religiously evil parents that want their children to do what they want and not how they develop naturally themselves. The dichotomy and plurality of many areas within the authoritarian confines of life speak from safe havens expressing individuality yet at the same time want everyone to be the same because you can't control individuality so that side of the the conversation is purely smart talk, the reality of individuality does scares them to bits. Individuality is about to a large extent going against the grain, it's how progress is made, it's how we break through barriers, it's what separates the 'men from the boys' it is what spear heads evolution as opposed to the fuddy duddies who believe they are the stalwarts of society yet are are pure gatekeepers and repressors by default.

From many an "internal" perspective it's always alright for "others" to be different to be "individually creative" but for those in your family or around that self same trait is defined as "weird" or "being confrontational" or "what's matter with them" such is the narrowness of many. It's ignorance and in many cases families that lack education and outward intelligence that fear the most and thus often ridicule those brighter than themselves. It tends to be these areas and educationally lacking that are the stalwarts of racism, sexism, religious zealots, etc, often it's those in the supposedly antagonised groups themselves that can cause more of a problem via their own attitude than those outside observing, as most people just don't care, get on with your life, let me live mine. And of course the old favourite 'attitude' rears its head, bad attitudes ALWAYS create dissent no matter who or what you are.

Hatred and jealousy, ego, arrogance, etc, stem predominantly from those who reside in areas of negativity, it's not that others don't possess such traits but they have other options too like getting a life and not just watching others have one. Everything we do or say is a manifestation of whom we are, we have to be "aware" of whom we are and how society is in order to proficiently go forward. If we have either an "attitude" problem or a bad perception of what life is like we will be that person by default that has little or no self esteem, and many people who have problems with various social groups are usually bad communicators in every way. Not only can they not communicate efficiently, i.e. say clearly what they want in a manner that others find acceptable, but the use of words and bad language automatically puts others off and puts then on a course of uneasiness, and that's failure by default. Bad communication is usually a family trait, not always but often, so if the child has no real drive within they follow suite and pick up all the bad habits, attitudes, feelings, underdog feelings, which is a shame for many only need a small spark of encouragement to excel in areas they had never dreamt off or more to the point dare not dream of.

Perfection doesn't exist but that's not important as most wouldn't recognise it anyway, the 75% rule exists for most where anything above makes a disproportionate difference to the value of the product and greatly increases the cost too. Society gets on well with less than perfection and to some extent substandard and even  shoddy, it finds its levels and we find ours. Costs don''t necessarily define a product as a "designer" dress can cost literally a few pounds or dollars to make yet be sold for thousands, again it finds its market. It's what we do with our lives that gives it value and unfortunately some people are not brought up with any personal value otherwise they would be better than they are in every respect. Our society teaches less of values in education today so that even technically brilliant people become introverted zombies because they live two lives. That of an intellectual (and they can be the biggest nerds on the planet full of idealistic theory and no substance) and then a life of trying to enjoy both whom they are and all that can enhance it, and neither at times works to any advantage.

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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
  (These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others)

FAILURE

Failure is a word that many people shy away from, it's not nice to be classed as a failure, or to have something not go the way it should have thus it's a failure. But failure has been given a bad name by inept people who basically do nothing themselves and these are the real failures. Without failure there would be no success whatsoever, and indeed is failure as designated by the onlookers really failure because many a time when things go wrong it's not failure it's vast experience and understanding of why things didn't quite go right and thus we are now the better and more wiser to both deal with and tackle life and the problems ahead of us. It's just so easy for the armchair experts to exert their dull formulaic logic on to those who have earnestly and dejectedly tried to forge a designed result and not to have met with those expectations. It's thanks to failures that many of us are still alive and kicking today even the critics of those who once seemingly failed yet in that plight sought the real truth and knowledge and ways to overcome and succeed way beyond expectations and often with heightened success at that.

Scientists, pharmacists, engineers often fail almost daily in their lives for years on end trying to find solutions, cures, technological advances, yet persevere they do until that 'ureka' moment comes along and mankind is better all around for that result. Many a business mogul can relate to failure more than once sometimes through no fault or bad judgement of their own, just circumstantial aspects have overtaken all their planning and pushed parameters beyond the potential buffering to withstand it all. So many small business men and women struggle beyond belief in getting their own businesses up and running making at times great sacrifices in order to keep the wheels turning, but like everything else perseverance pays off even if the route at times is more like a ride on the big dipper. The media and the backseat drivers judge the value and worth of those by what they perceive and can see, and fine let them, because the real successes are those who just "go for it" fighting at times against the odds and negative conditions. But as soon as it all changes then what a turnaround, but then your hard earned work pays off as you literally have life in your grasp and not that of those who judge without cause other than to make themselves feel better.

If you've ever hit the buffers running, turned down endless 'dead ends' being pushed by those who know more, looked down upon by the arrogant and egotists, being scorned by your family for not doing what they think, brushed aside by those that haven't a clue what you are doing nor want to know, rest assured that the knowledge you have is just fabulous, in that you have it all over and above everyone else. Even if at times you feel like you are walking in deep mud or swimming against the tide take heart that aircraft always fly against the wind and what a success they are, salmon swim against the currents and survive because of it. You don't have to follow the herd as there are no rules in life everything has its place. Failure isn't an option, it's just a generic term spewed out by those who can't justify an explanation, you know better and that smile that hides the inner tears and struggle is the first sign of overwhelming success, even if you think it's nowhere to be seen. So many people whether in a recession or not are at that 'tipping point' and like seeds in the ground nothing happenes for ages until one day those little green shoots start poking through.

There are no runways in life nor vertical takeoffs either, and whilst it may seem like that for some everyone has to put up with conditions that they never expected and at times some have to start again from scratch. Whatever your dream, goal, endeavour, it's you who are both the backbone and success, and not achieving your goal isn't failure, often what amounts to the end result has so much been modified because of new understandings, opportunities, technology, circumstances, etc, that whatever the result you're a success and failure as it were en-route has made you the ebullient lord of your domain, no one else. Never be put off by others negativity or not reaching what you set out to do, there isn't a company that hasn't had to change tack en-route to survive and accommodate updated circumstances and opportunities. Let nothing put you off the route to where your heart lies, and if one sees in history those that were told that they would never amount to anything, were told by those who had no vision themselves, and one such person told that ended up one President of America.

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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
(These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others)

MY LIFE - LET ME LIVE IT

We all like to think we are free, then when it suites us we make up stories about why we can't be or because of restrictions or circumstances, but that's a mixture of fear and apathy creeping in to our controlled version of reality. It is a controlled version as we model everything around our ability and not wanting really to venture too far if at all from our 'comfort zone'. It's nice to hold the thought that everything is available to us but we don't really want to venture down the route to get it as it's for most people a step too far. Freedom is relative,  there is always a latitude in freedom and what upsets the apple cart is that of fear itself, in that of allowing others to take control of their lives without being fettered to bureaucracy. i.e. you need permission to do almost anything. It's why the West has ventured further than most countries in terms of technology and creativity and left other areas of the world such as Africa and the Middle East at the bottom of the leagues in terms of innovation and what they give to society. Two extremes one area with relative wealth and the other with relative poverty and between them they contribute nothing as compared to other continents, so engrossed are they in bribery, corruption, bureaucracy, red tape, ministerial / official palm crossing, and so on and so forth. Even in China and India corruption is the biggest culprit to substandard lives and failure more than anything else.

However, where there is a will there is a way, we see around us shops, products, services all created by individuals outside of the major conglomerates. There is within society something that is nearly always sadly lacking in government, entrepreneurial thought. The ability to 'see' without being dragged down into the darkness by that awful word 'politics'. The ability to live life to the full and see values, see needs, see opportunities, and see progress of real value. It's not that governments don't in some areas do a bad job but they are predominantly staffed by inefficient plodders who are at times overburdened with red tape and age old lackadaisical hierarchy that's very very expensive, slow and diffident. The interface between commerce and government at times is like a tsunami itself, where the politicians and bureaucrats feel part of a plan but never be part of it as everything is transient and at times there is more of a collective ownership rather than that of a real leadership lead status.

But even in oppressive countries and religiously controlled countries there remains a degree of freedom, it lies in the underground, it lies in global communication, it lies in leaving the countries for overseas shores which many do, freedom cannot be quashed even when vast amounts of money are needlessly wasted in trying to control freedom and democracy. Nothing that man ever does is without fault, it's impossible as man is by default a creature of faults. But within it all lies that camaraderie of soul and love that makes it all work. Man is a love based creature, take away love and you have a robot or drone, even though a few buck the system for self greed and power the vast majority still subscribe to love for without it even the most creative thinker becomes unstable, as love binds our values and purpose together.

Families and at times educational establishments can actually demote your abilities based purely on their own negativity and personal lack of foresight and some notable examples of people being told when young they would amount to nothing have indeed proved the opposite. So it's very important to follow your own pathway in life and not ramble on aimlessly to those who subscribe to lower aspirations than yourself. Life has a habit of showing you the pathway forward but only if you meet it half way and not from a hypothetical stance but real action and deed. Don't falsely blame what others say about you, or don't falsely blame society or the people around you for being stupid or narrow minded. If you want to break the mould you will by default upset the dull miserable thinkers around you including perhaps your parents that want you to conform for their sake not yours (conditional love syndrome). As soon as success starts to rear its head all will change, but you will be not only wiser but light years ahead in the knowledge of the bigger picture and will see freedom shining through all the cracks that the bureaucrats can't see because of their blindness in seeing beyond tomorrow which is fear based, dark and nothing more.

For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
(These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others)

OVERCOMING ANYTHING

Whatever you think or whatever you apportion to your circumstances or upbringing or race or religion it all boils down to you, you are the one who decides who you are and what you are and not others. It's you who walks in your shoes, it's you who eats sleeps and drinks in your skin, and at the end of the day this happens literally until you die, it's you who is the person who is laid to rest, no one else can ever do that.  The real truth is that if you think you can't you probably won't because you are stacking all the odds against yourself, and if you think you can you have every possibility of doing so. And if you have a chip on your shoulder you'll forever have problems in your life, forever. If for one moment you ever bring yourself down or compare yourself to people of a lesser disposition or lowness then that's by default your Achilles heal that is going to tether yourself to being a lower common denominator within what hope you ever have, even if it's said in jest. Where the mind goes the body follows so it if failure is somewhere amongst your thoughts as a base parameter then that's what is going to be the default thought especially when times get tough or great decisions have to be made. Whatever help or opportunities come your way it's you who will make or break them, it's you who will enjoy the energy of opportunity that exists or turn it in to fear, it's the same energy  it's purely down to how it's used or transmuted. Like Uranium you either make a bomb and blow yourself up or harness it to make nuclear electricity.

Success is not listening to the throng of backseat commentators, it's keeping your own council and surrounding yourself with positively minded people. It's getting into the habit if it's not a natural occurrence to talking positive and not seeing life as 'me and them' as that will further segregate your thoughts as to climbing higher up the ladder. Being reclusive will only furthermore reduce life to something that is lived within the mind and not in the world itself, sharing energy of a positive nature and elevating conversations will introduce conduits and knowledge to further enhance life and give it a strength that otherwise would be missing. It's important to see others 'breaking the mould' as that is an impetus to the self to follow suite in your respective field. Magic wands don't exist, I've looked, but all around us at least for the positively minded are those who know those vital bits of information that we need to 'get on. And what's more (this is the good news) is that if you come across them they will because they will recognise your verve and stealth help you by imparting or assisting your progress. It's their purpose but the key to such people is pure and unadulterated 'positivity' nothing more nothing less, they don't want to hear about past failures they want to know about future success as that's where they want to help you strive to. And for those who are saying "Well I've never met anyone like that" just think that by saying that it's an attitude that already has streaks or self negativity and even arrogance built in. People come across what you do at certain times in life, they do so because what you have already done has planted a root that is now germinating, even if its taken years. Keeping an open mind on your subject opens up many doors and like everything else when the time is right even unbeknown to you or your project / style it all  may need modification to bear fruit, something that might initially go against the grain, but think hard as this could be the one thing that zooms you to success. There's nothing like being staid and unyielding to find success was turned into failure because of ego.

The road to success can be lonely, it can be very isolated and it can be disconcerting at times, but if what you want is that strong it can also be exciting and wondrous and prove incredibly fruitful both emotionally and financially too. Overcoming is a mental concept it's not looking at obstacles and barriers they don't exist, success is finding ways around them all and separates the leaders from the followers. As success nears the road gets narrower then it just opens up to show that wondrous view ahead, and then starts yet another journey, a slightly different one never the less a journey of differing proportions but one which can elevate your thoughts and deeds to levels beyond your previous comprehension. Sometimes we strive at things because of our narrowness of heart and mind, just to try and make something succeed for sheer spite, but from a bigger picture the greater good should always be of paramount importance. Building the house is better than mentally decorating it before it reaches completion. So many people fail because of their narrowness or blinkered attitude, and self indulgent lowness, wallowing in a pity that's akin to losing before you start. If you feel low then your approach and even writing skills will enhance that for others to subliminally pick up. A smile both internally and externally opens up endless possibilities, it shows whatever you are going through that you are not going to be beaten or be put down no matter what. Success is that close as it starts from within.

For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
FREE "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com
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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
(These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others).

LOST IN THE CROWD

 In the very same world there is a dichotomy of individualism, there's the advanced world where you can be what or who you want, the only thing stopping you be that person is yourself and your inhibitions, so if that's the case you aren't really that serious. Then there's the backward world, Africa, the Middle East, some Eastern European countries and a few elsewhere dotted around the planet where their rancid outmoded cultures and ideologies almost forbid people to be different such is the narrowness of either their respective governments or the people, and it's usually a mixture of both. This narrowness shows up in the fact that such countries never contribute to society they are always takers and have excuses by the volume as to why they are like that, much of it historical. But when individualism is stifled then is there any wonder progress in real terms is never made. But nothing is at it appears, what is seen on the surface is rarely seen below, and what we perceive from afar is nothing as to how it is first hand.

Similarly one doesn't have to venture far today to find a plethora of people who are lost, isolated, confused, dejected and wandering aimlessly in their minds for some degree of solace and understanding as to what their lives mean. It's not that eternal question "the meaning of life" but just them at a stargate point and not really engaging with life even after reading a stream of books with answers on everything. So good are these books depicting aspects of life they are all best sellers and being taught in the curricula of schools world wide, one thinks not. The solution to the restful mind is more about oneself than what's around us. It's often down to the thought processes of the individual not conforming to the overall dullness of those who accept life as it is and have no desire to do anything other than what they do. Not that there is anything wrong with that, it's their choice to some degree, but it does ponder the question as to where at times one fits in and that can include family, friends and those who one works with. It's not self alienation but an internal frustration that's impervious to pep talks and light conversation, it needs quenching with substantiated information that has real substance and not that manufactured by the media  which is impotent in content and has nothing to do with ultimate progress.

Society talks on different levels and its meaning is not always what it says. There are the proverbial "out of the box" thinkers, then there are those a few rungs down the ladder and that followed by those towards the lower end. All have a place in life and society and all have their individual problems which surprisingly are very similar in context even if some are slightly more grand or less so. The feeling of isolation of life not melding with oneself is not uncommon and discord within is the result which then escalates the situation. Unless one is very much an individual and most people like to think they are, and they are to some extent, but not so different from the throng which doesn't isolate them, they isolate themselves not quite knowing what to do. Deep thinkers can find life lonely at times and at other times quite exhilarating, a significant partner helps many although it's also not ideal for a few as their self instability is something they eternally struggle with.

For every feeling we have there is not only a solution there is a cause istelf and often what makes the feeling is something that is not resonating well within us that has nothing or little to do with what we are perceiving. The outward effect has a bearing on how we are living and enjoying life, because if that's out of kilter or some areas are not harmoious then they will be magnified by those areas we want to flourish in but just don't. The homogenous aspects of life can't be emphasised enough and those feelings that 'if this' or 'that' were OK so would everything else, not so. We often place something on the back burner  because it doesn't appear at large to be the culprit, yet most likely it is, it's just us looking for some self technical terms to latch on to to try and satify what's going on within then feel smug that we know and then eventually hope it will all be OK. We do have however that great ability to break out of ourselves and join the 'party' without jeapodising our thoughts and feelings and future plans, for if we do 'join the party' we elevate ourselves out of the regurgitating doldrums and see a lighter aspect to our thoughts, something that we overlooked by incriminating ourselves and that we should never ever do.

For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
FREE "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com
RADIO : www.liferadiointernational.com
©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
(These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others).

ARE YOU PART OF THE PROBLEM

Endlessly chewing over the past, ruminating over the present and regurgitating the failures, staring at the closed doors, reminiscing at all the endless cul de sac's that you've come across guarantees just one thing, you're never ever going to get a break because you're looking at the past. The future whatever it is is there for you, but if your mind is focused upon other negative things then you are sadly going to miss out on the opportunities, the openings, the entrances, the open doors, the conduits, the fast tracks, the quantum leaps and all the rest. Life is looking forward as that's the direction you are travelling. So many people view life and what's in it as a series of insurmountable events based always on the past or even hereditary conditions or self created visions of fear that stymies all before them. Problems as we perceive them are events that we identify as not being conducive to our need or cause, so that in itself is debatable as to whether it's a problem or not or how we are mentally placed to take remedial or appropriate action to move forward making our perceived problem a thing of the past. Problems vary in magnitude and proportion and thus they happen in our lives and those of others daily, sometimes with devastating consequences others with consequences of little merit that we bolster up and cause to be out of all proportion, this is how we take on board our own thought process and value, selfishness has a great deal to play in how we deal with anything in life.

 

 

Today's increasing "blame culture" is an option that many take to both absolve themselves of any connection to the problem other than to seek the "victim mentality" and at the same time try to solicit the sympathy vote so hopefully someone will try and tackle their problem for them. It seldom works as this route implies deeply within that your own value is of little worth and that your future is not going to be of any worthwhile substance, i.e. life is going to be a struggle hopping from event to event to try and get by. It's got to be said that problems aren't the best thing to happen to us as they nearly always take a bite out of our plans and fill our minds with thoughts of immediate change or even re-routing what we had planned to take in the extra work needed to get back on track again. Having said that the adage "every cloud has a silver lining" can in many instances work to our long term benefit if we have an open mind as to what's happened and not make everything that doesn't go our way as a drama, which some do and some cultures definitely do. The more of an even keel we can keep our thoughts on the better life always is as we can then enjoy the highs and not get bogged down in artificial lows which has a tendency to permanently make us sceptical about life in general, and then we lose out by default.

Whatever besets and befalls us integrates us into the situation, whether it's a car accident, a bereavement, our washing machine spewing water all over the floor, or our TV breaking down just before the favourite late night movie we have been waiting to see. Or that a strike with the airlines has curtailed our long awaited and saved up for holidays, or just before we embark on our house extension we are made redundant, or our beloved partner is diagnosed with a terminal illness, problems exist in all shapes and sizes and are as real to the individual regardless of their magnitude, comparisons are a useless linkage. How we deal with our lives is how we enjoy them or get by ourselves, if we forever tell all and sundry about our problems or indeed anyone who will listen we quickly lose our ability to cope as we give our problem gravitas and thus it starts in our mind to becoming a living reality which takes on a mantle of its own as opposed to a passing incident.

 

 

Whatever involves us needs to be remedied, procrastination only increases the stress factor and aggravates the final act of rectification. We are always part of the problem otherwise there wouldn't be a problem, it's how like everything to do with us we deal with it and mentally place it in a pecking order that makes it workable and effective in its execution or long term understanding. If we don't find mental solace it becomes a nightmare of Hollywood proportions which we then have created a scenario that we have to live by and that in itself will have consequences that will ultimately implode and bring us down even further. We must however never ever lose sight of the good things in life, and the conversations that many put out such as "how can I see good things in life when I'm going through this" etc, or words to that effect just goes to show how narrow mindedness of the self can effectively bring one down and form a platform of unhappiness that may be there for ever. Ingrained thoughts are at times the most difficult to shift and people who create them tend to hold on to them as a crux for their entire future life. We are an entity of our own making, like it or not the smile we have on our face may cover up a whole multitude of unsavoury incidents, but those that make the effort to smile regardless do enjoy the best of what life can bring as opposed to the worst others create themselves.

 

 

For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
FREE "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com
RADIO : www.liferadiointernational.com
©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012

(These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others).

THE RELATIVITY OF A BETTER LIFE

Life is how it is, situations are as they are, parameters happen to exist, and yet it's all subject to change, life really does evolve even on a small scale, life can change in an instant from bad to worse or from poor to rich, behind the scenes in life events are happening that we know nothing of. We can leave home one day and never return, nothing is irreplaceable nor indestructible, our molecular structure the commonality of the universe and it's perpetual vibration sees to that. How we see life is exactly how it is, it can't be any other way as we create our own reality, no one else thinks in our minds nor does what we have to do, everything that emanates from us is via our thought process nothing more. The way we talk, smile, interact, laugh is definitive of whom we are, alternatively we can be dull, morose, fearful, glum etc, and that too represents what's going on inside. We live and breathe in our own skin and if we thus decide, and we do decide that life isn't good and acquiesce to those thoughts via our feelings then life will be just that. Whatever we think or feel it comes from within, not from circumstances or anything else even if they are dire, how we react thereafter is down to us. And yes when all goes wrong it is difficult to muster up positive energy but the alternative of wallowing in negative energy is just not worth thinking about either. For some "going with the flow" is all too easy a "cop out" that produces a nothingness in their lives which they then perpetually struggle with.

When we are asked how we are we either generically say "I'm fine or I'm good - thank you" for whether we are or not whoever asked us doesn't want a negative answer nor are they equipped to help us and in reality could be worse off than ourselves. Then we have the options, "could be better" or "could be worse" better than what or worse than what we we never qualify, but it's an understood statement and it's quickly dismissed. When making comparisons of ourselves we predominantly do so against those that are seemingly better off than those who are seemingly worse off, in fact we dismiss those worse off as if it's their own fault for being worse off in the first place. It often isn't and people less fortunate than ourselves can actually have better lives in every area as it's a perception and one that they live within far more comfortably. Most people religious or not like to feel they are "spiritual" but haven't a clue as to what being "spiritual" is, which matters not as if you don't know what something is even if you have a general idea, the bottom line is you don't thus live up to a weak perception of it as it doesn't bear any weight within your mind structure. Our background ideals take residence in our speech but rack up not so well in the reality of our daily living.

Our life is interjected with a whole array of stops and starts and wild thoughts and mundane moments and everything in between, it happens to everyone. Some people have very energetic lives others don't. Those that have energetic lives are always full of excitement and vigour and potential, those that don't always seek tiredness and rest as an ongoing excuse to keep alive. Basically it's the body shutting down from boredom and lack of real initiative and an attitude that's completely lax and thus fires up now and then rather than predominantly all the time. Everything in life is relative, relative to what options exist and where we are placed towards those options being realistic events. Often what we seek isn't seeking us and if we don't come to grips with that thought then we are going to end up on a losing trail. If what we seek isn't there for us then we need to create a product that's acceptable and encompasses what we have to offer, such a move then proves ones own mettle and verve.

If we look at our self as an actor on the stage of life and what we are doing no matter how technically accomplished and creative we are and it doesn't resonate with the audience, it could be that the audience isn't up to our advanced display or maybe just plain thick and stupid, then the writing is on the wall. Repositioning ourselves to target what we do best, and then when we get established change it accordingly, which is what many do works well, as then it's got gravitas and pseudo stamina. Ironically those that once turned you down will then have the confidence to like what you do, such is the fickle nature of life and the relativity of it all. Better exists all around us, we choose not to see it often as our narrow and defined views usually prefer to see better as something more grand than what it is hence so many people are permanently not as happy as they should be.   

For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
FREE "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com
John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012

EVERYONE IS A WINNER

Today it seems that everyone and everything is being forever judged by backseat drivers, those who are "critics" or pass judgement on others and situations. The television is littered with experts on a whole manner of subjects spouting off about what should have been done and what could be done and why it went wrong, as if none of us are experts of hindsight. Yet the vast majority of these so called experts do absolutely sod all in their lives to contribute to positive change, they just comment and nothing more. And whilst it is all supposed to give gravitas to the subject matter it is after a time like watching the same old wallpaper dry, it becomes a pure back drop for organised diatribe to fill a column, fill a few minutes on the news, fill in a documentary and for some supposedly 'intellectual' programmes it's almost a public display of mental masturbation, the same old people wheeled out of hibernation and given a 60 min life yet again.

Everyone today has a part to play even if it's just living your own life to the best ability you have. There are of course those that drop by the wayside and become fodder for those that have ideas and thoughts as to what to do with such people and there are those that actually roll their sleeves up and get down to the job of helping them whilst the intellectuals intellectualise and again do sod all about it, which seems to be becoming more and more prevalent today than ever before. Whilst we live in a big world life is getting smaller, our microcosm of an existence is the first and most important thing for us for if we can't make a go of it no one else can do so for us unless it's something not so savoury that we wish not to contemplate like a prison or such institution.

Everywhere we go someone casts aspersions as to what it is or what has been done as if they are the first and last word on the subject which if the truth be known, if they died overnight no one would miss them as their interjection of knowledge is tertiary and purely cosmetic and like all cosmetics they get washed off for a new application every day.  The media have a cosy relationship with critics but as the paper medium is dying is there no wonder why the acerbic bitchy hollow and shallow critics seem to make a life out of finding fault as if there is a prize for pulling down man's own efforts and those that try and those that invest their time and money in to what they do, whilst critics again do sod all, and in fact have little to offer the world other than perhaps at the end of their lives as bone meal. Do they get some perverse pleasure of covering up their own inabilities by knocking others, even if what others do doesn't come off, and it doesn't come off every time for everyone, but the delight and the brusqueness that they wallow in like pigs in shit outlines what weak people they really are.

Society gets along by degrees of communal acceptance, our dearth of variety is out there because people actually try and many go through almost nightmare situations just to get to the initial stages often wracked in problems that emerge as they do from no fault of their own, and of course insipid bureaucracy that springs up run by even more insipid and dull and lifeless people. It's time that there was a cull of the negatively arrogant little peasants who mascaraed as bastions of knowledge and all of understanding to know that in truth it's not them that are loved at all it's those that try and those that have real humanity and compassion within them.

Families too can be your biggest downfall as can your religion, being judged not for whom you are but from their point of view you don't do what they want? So where is the unconditional love? What happened to it? Your happiness is the prime and pole event in the hole of your life, if someone you know or love is happy what more could you want for them. Whether you agree or like what they do is YOUR take on life, to impose your views is cruel, selfish, evil and wicked and so many religions take this righteous mantle but are not even close to God in their motives. The Middle East is a living prime example.

Never ever let anyone put you down, whether you have made a mistake or life hasn't gone as well as you would have wished. You are entitled to be whom you are regardless and even if your professional presentation especially via the fickle and heartless media isn't on the day that bright, don't worry, life has a really way of bouncing back. Nearly all the greatest inventions people in life have failed and won the day and if you look back at what the critics said it's laughable as they are laughable. Stand your ground no one deliberately goes out of their way to be substandard especially when they have invested so much in what it is they do. Don't ever allow a five minute critic whose life will end up in hell to put you down. You are a winner and enjoy the kudos.

For more www.thelifedoctor.info
Free "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com
©John Rushton / The Life Alchemist 2012

SOLUTIONS TO ALL YOUR PROBLEMS

We often look at life and try and foresee what may happen in the future, sometimes even not wanting to think of what may happen as it's too unpleasant. But "stuff" does happen and we have to make decisions sometimes very unpleasant ones in order to effect a solution even if it's by default, we still have to do it. If one listens to what people say, which many don't today, they prefer to speak rather than listen and give their point of view one can almost instantly get their opinion, their views, how they think, what they are planning to do, their temperament, their traits, their sensitivities, their stubborn points, their narrow views on certain subjects, their failure aspects, their desires, what excites them, their flippant tendencies, and their fears, plus a whole load of nuances that may arise. It's given away in what and how we say anything.We can at times be our own worst enemies, something we don't wont anyone to tell us anything, we can also at times mix fact and fantasy together and try and make some degree of sense out of it all only to get into a worse situation than before. Decisions at times have to be taken, we also have "ideals" as to what we want, how we want it / them, how it looks like, how it fits in with our desired pattern in life, and so on, so when a decision is made it's contrived to hopefully meld in to what we have to do. When that doesn't happen which is quite often and a compromise is not to be made then we have what we call a problem. But it isn't a problem, it's just us not liking what the solution is to be. If we are honest with ourselves we know that as a truth from day one, but often we go a long way down the road to see if at some point we can effect a change that brings it all into line with our thoughts and feelings, it rarely happens. In relationships this is a prime area of conflict rather than compromise and can be sorted easily but rarely is. Silly but there we are.

We see other people making drastic changes to their lives and apart from a few glum looks they seem to be handling it well as if it's all so easy and that they have come to grips or terms with what has had to be done. We then place ourselves into their position hypothetically and see how we would feel and it just doesn't work, we have too many obstacles and personal likes and dislikes in the way and it would mean altering our cosy relationship with the current status quo, which will definitely not do. And so it goes on, we keep looking at life from afar, assessing what we think and feel in relation to others and it rarely works out. Of course we are all different some people are gregarious and accept what's what and get on with it keeping a positive mind as to the future. Others completely the opposite and any opposition to what they think or feel is riddled with the "woe is me" attitude that prevails and almost at times makes them ill or full of ongoing consternation.

There is a solution to every problem although not always as we would like but never the less a solution exists, politicians have to make "overall" choices in what they do "for the best" as there usually isn't a "one size fits all" yet real statesmanship is sadly a thing of the past where PR and personal positioning overrules what is expedient and many such people are weak as are many company leaders today except where personal greed is an option and they'll then fight to the death. Life has to have a purpose, it has to be universal and if you have a partner it has to encompass both elements, although there usually is one element that is more ethereal and selfishly motivated (I like, I want, I don't like, I don't want but none of it having real substance) so some degree of pressurised compromise has to be made, but it usually is made and ultimately it turns out right.

Placing the word problem in your vocabulary or potential problem often creates what one is seeking to avoid, a solution as to seeing around or ways forward existing over and above the dullness of negativity which dwells on lowness and thus misses out of the availability of options. Often solutions will not please everyone who is a part of the solution, but that's alright as we have no contract with life to make others happy nor sort out their problems even if we are a part cause of them albeit by default. It's a degree of maturity that others the recipients of our effected decisions take control and steer their own life back into how they need it to be after all they steer their own ship not you. Provided your decisions are made with clear thought i.e. not malicious then one need not worry about the effects on others even if they selfishly moan and groan, which which many do today. You are number one, without being selfish or self centred, make a decision that suits you, do not compromise yourself in life as it will only compound problems further down the line, respect yourself and don't play the martyr, which is not to say that if minor compromises need to be made via your good will then so be it. But be logical not emotional or you will by your own hand default yourself into a position that you will most likely come to regret and in the long term not have any thanks from those you thought of well at the beginning in making your judgement.

For more www.thelifedoctor.info
Free "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com

©John Rushton / The Life Alchemist 2012