FOR THE LOVE OF IT

What kind of a person are you? How do you look at life and how do you deal with all the ups and downs that one goes through? Are you a person that enjoys the good times but is a mess when it all goes 'belly up'? Are you a sociable and friendly type of person, someone who is approachable and leaves their own thoughts and feelings aside when others "grate on you" and start talking to you? Are you that affable soul that looks cheerful even when racing away with a hundred different things that need to be done? Can you see the 'bigger picture' predominantly in life as opposed to residing in a narrow microcosm of the narrow mindedness and stilted views? Are you an "all round" "Mr.Nice Guy" or are you touchy, snooty, stupid, selfish, picky, opinionated, not very knowledgeable about food or drink and selective to a high degree, stick to staid views, judgemental, etc, because if you are you will not be alone? Are you outgoing, gregarious, adventurous, or are you moody, insular, choosy, and not knowingly boring, even though you think you are the opposite - but if you are you are not alone? Do you have a good general knowledge of what's going on in the world or predominantly only know which celebrities are sleeping with whom and are in rehab because if that's your lot you are not alone? Do you just go through life or do you make a life, do you bring richness into your life or do you wait for richness whatever that is to enter via someone else- because if you do you are not alone? Do you walk your pathway in life or do you follow everyone else marvelling at what they have done but not  much to show of the self, because if you do you are not alone? Do you think you are loving and compassionate and warm and kind and generous and follow that through outside of the family to others - because if you think that then you are not alone? Do you think that you are intelligent, aware, knowledgeable, worldly, understanding, have social graces, etiquette, (whether you have or not or aspire to have) because if you do you are not alone.

What do you do for love in your life outside of your family, or does it just stop there? Do you even consider love to be an important or intricate part of your life or does it never cross your mind or just think that you are a loving sort of person and that's it? Do you feel that you are compassionate and because of that you are cool with that "smug" feeling that you have that trait so it's all all right? Are you open minded or like to think you are if asked yet deep down you are quite rigid in your thoughts and selective perceptions?  Do you think you should be better than you are or further on in life? Has your life a purpose or do you just live it and have private thoughts as to where  it should or might go? Are your aspirations wholesome or idealistically based upon what you would like to see as opposed to those based upon everyone not just your ideals or whims? What makes you happy, and where does your thought train reside when it comes to possession of material effects and acquisitions? Are you self confident yet not smug nor arrogant and do you ever get intimidated by those who seemingly have more than you or do you like to show off with the few bits that you have already to appease that inner self as to satisfaction and establishment of whom you are? Do you lead or follow, and if so are you happy with either or do you prefer to call yourself entrepreneurial as it sounds good, feels good and encompasses areas that you don't like to think about individually?

The love walk in life is all about us, no one else, the more love we have the lighter life is and the greater understanding we have for everything and the less emotionally involved we get with trivia or problems that are way beyond our control. We also more frequently see the "bigger picture" and don't take offence ever if we are called names or shouted at or whatever it may be, as it says more about the other person / others than ourselves. When things are not so hot knowing that it will get better enables us not to automatically take a ride on the "miserable" coach until it does, we are fine just now - regardless.The more we interact with elements, media, stories about what is not of our concern, the more we allow the "Sponge Effect" to take shape, i.e. we keep subliminally absorbing information that we don't or can't use until we become over full then start to weaken our resolve, we become saturated with trivia at the expense of real concern and love about the things we have authority and control over.   

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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
(These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others),

HATE AND PERFECTION

More than ever today the young are put under pressure to conform, all the hollow talk of allowing them to being individuals is rubbish as once they start to differ from the 'norm' they are soon reprimanded because the "parents" or "social class" feels threatened and frightened and have doubts themselves, not to mention are at times totally ignorant about the whole scenario. Parents can be the best thing for any young person or they can be the worse thing ever and cause their children untold stress anxiety and a repressive early life especially the very religiously evil parents that want their children to do what they want and not how they develop naturally themselves. The dichotomy and plurality of many areas within the authoritarian confines of life speak from safe havens expressing individuality yet at the same time want everyone to be the same because you can't control individuality so that side of the the conversation is purely smart talk, the reality of individuality does scares them to bits. Individuality is about to a large extent going against the grain, it's how progress is made, it's how we break through barriers, it's what separates the 'men from the boys' it is what spear heads evolution as opposed to the fuddy duddies who believe they are the stalwarts of society yet are are pure gatekeepers and repressors by default.

From many an "internal" perspective it's always alright for "others" to be different to be "individually creative" but for those in your family or around that self same trait is defined as "weird" or "being confrontational" or "what's matter with them" such is the narrowness of many. It's ignorance and in many cases families that lack education and outward intelligence that fear the most and thus often ridicule those brighter than themselves. It tends to be these areas and educationally lacking that are the stalwarts of racism, sexism, religious zealots, etc, often it's those in the supposedly antagonised groups themselves that can cause more of a problem via their own attitude than those outside observing, as most people just don't care, get on with your life, let me live mine. And of course the old favourite 'attitude' rears its head, bad attitudes ALWAYS create dissent no matter who or what you are.

Hatred and jealousy, ego, arrogance, etc, stem predominantly from those who reside in areas of negativity, it's not that others don't possess such traits but they have other options too like getting a life and not just watching others have one. Everything we do or say is a manifestation of whom we are, we have to be "aware" of whom we are and how society is in order to proficiently go forward. If we have either an "attitude" problem or a bad perception of what life is like we will be that person by default that has little or no self esteem, and many people who have problems with various social groups are usually bad communicators in every way. Not only can they not communicate efficiently, i.e. say clearly what they want in a manner that others find acceptable, but the use of words and bad language automatically puts others off and puts then on a course of uneasiness, and that's failure by default. Bad communication is usually a family trait, not always but often, so if the child has no real drive within they follow suite and pick up all the bad habits, attitudes, feelings, underdog feelings, which is a shame for many only need a small spark of encouragement to excel in areas they had never dreamt off or more to the point dare not dream of.

Perfection doesn't exist but that's not important as most wouldn't recognise it anyway, the 75% rule exists for most where anything above makes a disproportionate difference to the value of the product and greatly increases the cost too. Society gets on well with less than perfection and to some extent substandard and even  shoddy, it finds its levels and we find ours. Costs don''t necessarily define a product as a "designer" dress can cost literally a few pounds or dollars to make yet be sold for thousands, again it finds its market. It's what we do with our lives that gives it value and unfortunately some people are not brought up with any personal value otherwise they would be better than they are in every respect. Our society teaches less of values in education today so that even technically brilliant people become introverted zombies because they live two lives. That of an intellectual (and they can be the biggest nerds on the planet full of idealistic theory and no substance) and then a life of trying to enjoy both whom they are and all that can enhance it, and neither at times works to any advantage.

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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
  (These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others)