FOR THE LOVE OF IT

What kind of a person are you? How do you look at life and how do you deal with all the ups and downs that one goes through? Are you a person that enjoys the good times but is a mess when it all goes 'belly up'? Are you a sociable and friendly type of person, someone who is approachable and leaves their own thoughts and feelings aside when others "grate on you" and start talking to you? Are you that affable soul that looks cheerful even when racing away with a hundred different things that need to be done? Can you see the 'bigger picture' predominantly in life as opposed to residing in a narrow microcosm of the narrow mindedness and stilted views? Are you an "all round" "Mr.Nice Guy" or are you touchy, snooty, stupid, selfish, picky, opinionated, not very knowledgeable about food or drink and selective to a high degree, stick to staid views, judgemental, etc, because if you are you will not be alone? Are you outgoing, gregarious, adventurous, or are you moody, insular, choosy, and not knowingly boring, even though you think you are the opposite - but if you are you are not alone? Do you have a good general knowledge of what's going on in the world or predominantly only know which celebrities are sleeping with whom and are in rehab because if that's your lot you are not alone? Do you just go through life or do you make a life, do you bring richness into your life or do you wait for richness whatever that is to enter via someone else- because if you do you are not alone? Do you walk your pathway in life or do you follow everyone else marvelling at what they have done but not  much to show of the self, because if you do you are not alone? Do you think you are loving and compassionate and warm and kind and generous and follow that through outside of the family to others - because if you think that then you are not alone? Do you think that you are intelligent, aware, knowledgeable, worldly, understanding, have social graces, etiquette, (whether you have or not or aspire to have) because if you do you are not alone.

What do you do for love in your life outside of your family, or does it just stop there? Do you even consider love to be an important or intricate part of your life or does it never cross your mind or just think that you are a loving sort of person and that's it? Do you feel that you are compassionate and because of that you are cool with that "smug" feeling that you have that trait so it's all all right? Are you open minded or like to think you are if asked yet deep down you are quite rigid in your thoughts and selective perceptions?  Do you think you should be better than you are or further on in life? Has your life a purpose or do you just live it and have private thoughts as to where  it should or might go? Are your aspirations wholesome or idealistically based upon what you would like to see as opposed to those based upon everyone not just your ideals or whims? What makes you happy, and where does your thought train reside when it comes to possession of material effects and acquisitions? Are you self confident yet not smug nor arrogant and do you ever get intimidated by those who seemingly have more than you or do you like to show off with the few bits that you have already to appease that inner self as to satisfaction and establishment of whom you are? Do you lead or follow, and if so are you happy with either or do you prefer to call yourself entrepreneurial as it sounds good, feels good and encompasses areas that you don't like to think about individually?

The love walk in life is all about us, no one else, the more love we have the lighter life is and the greater understanding we have for everything and the less emotionally involved we get with trivia or problems that are way beyond our control. We also more frequently see the "bigger picture" and don't take offence ever if we are called names or shouted at or whatever it may be, as it says more about the other person / others than ourselves. When things are not so hot knowing that it will get better enables us not to automatically take a ride on the "miserable" coach until it does, we are fine just now - regardless.The more we interact with elements, media, stories about what is not of our concern, the more we allow the "Sponge Effect" to take shape, i.e. we keep subliminally absorbing information that we don't or can't use until we become over full then start to weaken our resolve, we become saturated with trivia at the expense of real concern and love about the things we have authority and control over.   

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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
(These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others),

WHAT IS YOUR REALITY?

Everyone has a view on life, how we view life depends upon a number of things and a number of internal parameters, some seemingly have already been pre-set whilst others we have acquired or foster acordingly as they resonate with our overall thought mode. Even asking the same question to a number of people on the same topic can produced a myriad of differing responses such is the variety of options that are available to us and thus it's this difference that produces our own reality. The horizon for instance for some is engaging, fascinatingly haunting and produces an inner excitement for further possibilities and potential, whereas for others it's a distance too far, frightening, fearful, unknown, yet these two views can sit side by side and view the same horizon and come up with two totally different perspectives. It's this dichotomy of perspectives that produces all what we think and how we react to life and why some generate their happiness within, for that's where it resides for everyone, and those that perpetually seek happiness because they are negatively dispositioned. However it's our emotions that display how we take life on board such as ego, arrogance, jealousy, greed, envy, it's always the negative emotions for the positive emotions spring from love where nothing can go wrong, negative emotions suspend reason hence there is so much upset and anger between what we think and others possibly think. Politically correct people are also negatively charged via their own make of selfishness hiding under the auspices of 'doing good' for others or society, but in reality they have appointed themselves into a position where they are not wanted and become gatekeepers holding back truth and hiding their own failings and pathetic inabilities.

We subliminally have an idea of what we would like in life or like life to be like, but that is just that an idea, we live solely in the present and that is where we must enjoy life because if we don't we then end up with historical gaps of the past of not being happy and having wasted our time seeking a future that has come and gone and not materialised into anything we have wanted. Even if our ideals come to pass in a respectable time frame they are never the same as we would have envisaged even if they happen to be better. Of course paving the way for a better tomorrow is good and expedient for most people so the journey should be enjoyed not endured for if it isn't resentment starts to creep in and that then clouds our whole thought process which ultimately leads to a negative perspective of life. The media and following rubbish on the TV and in the press have a lot to do with many subliminally absorbing it like a sponge and not processing it accordingly (squeezing it out) but that's more to do with intelligence and personal thought than the media itself who will stop at nothing to peddle their wares, we do have an option however to discern an option that for many is sadly impotent.

No one knows what lies in store for our future but being positive in mind always lightens the load with regards upsets and attracts positive solutions as to getting the best out of what there is and the vast array of options that are 'out there'. We think we have a 'good idea' but in reality that's only what we know of or more accurately 'think of' and not what is out there as we haven't a clue what really exists. This is where narrow mindedness and arrogance and stupidity take a part in our own created downfall, pretending that we know whereas if we had an open mind a whole manner of opportunities would avail themselves to us. One reason why entrepreneurs do well and the so called "open minded" who are anything but fall by the wayside and then wonder why and feel disgruntled in the process too. Our real reality is what it is, who we are where we are and what we have, it doesn't matter what that consists of as there are no rules levels or parameters, they differ enormously from every person on the planet even if some are almost parallel. But perception is something to be understood by everyone and allowing others to have their perceived ideas and allowing our own to change as we become enlightened is a way forward that can enhance our whole being and give us a peace, understanding, love walk, happiness, stability, improved mental health and physical health that we might otherwise have jeopardised because of stilted thoughts.

There isn't an equation in life as to what you need or see as compared to anything else that means it's all OK. Nor are perceptions of what some have or others don't have mean anything except via  materialistic thoughts and self concocted or conjured up ideals which have no bearing upon the life you are living at the moment, even if you are sadly lacking in resources this makes no difference at all. The moment you place ethereal aspects of life upon material aspects of life you have lost the plot, and yes it's nice to have nice things but that's it nothing more. Perceptions are often based upon security and when one becomes more secure attitudes change whatever is security for yourself, financial, job, health, relationship, etc. However once we attain a modicum of what we think is essential to our life we then seek something else, it's bit like the carrot and the donkey scenario, it's always one step ahead of us. But reality is exactly what it is, the comments about "the real world" are rubbish, if you are living and breathing then you are in the real world, regardless of your standing. It's up to you to make the best of it and not place idealistic thoughts and negativities ahead of you or you will never ever be happy or fulfilled or stable.

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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
 (These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others)

SHARING - THAT FEELING

One of the greatest feelings you can ever have is that of sharing, sharing moments with strangers via a common understanding of whatever has happened or been seen, even without saying a word. Or most deeply heartwarming is that of the sharing of loved ones and friends a part of your life regardless of the incident or situation. Even sharing a moment together of great distress is a moment in reflection of the gratitude of that person being there at that time that helped so much and brought a real presence of what life and humanity is all about. There's nothing better than being able to share your partner, your children, your parents, your very close friends that at times are even closer than relatives. The feeling that you can say and do and confide and be silly (or worse) in their company and laugh it all off because they not only love you but respect you and deep down like to feel that when you share you share, it's not a conditional relationship it's "anything goes" and you both or all lap it all up for what it''s worth. That warm comforting feeling, that almost smug feeling on invincibility that life just can't get better that material values are at those moments just worthless as they are objects without heart or soul.

It's essential to us all that we can share with others for if we don't or can't then it makes us both hard within and forms a mental barrier that hinders our ability to communicate efficiently and with depth. Sharing with pertinent others also allows us to share with those we don't like or don't trust or those who are in effect down right rude to us too, and stops offence being taken as well as getting upset by others saying either deliberately or out of turn things we find distasteful or possibly hurtful. Sharing creates a brighter mind and elevates life shunning out loneliness and selfishness which can be crippling and debilitating for the self and life. Sharing on a humanitarian basis not the sharing which is "all about me" enables productivity, trust, respect, faith, creativity, opportunity, advancement, purpose and an overall feeling of well being regardless of any overall circumstances. People who share are more apt to "read situations" as they are lighter in their minds and can see troubles and others faults far more than those who keep to themselves everything for a whole range of fears about letting go and thus destroying themselves or worse.

But sharing isn't telling everyone everything about you, it's not being that proverbial "open book"  it's allowing others to 'meld' with you, to feel the real truth of life and whatever else transpires needs a high degree of respect and inner value to come forth, which separates those out who are only in life for what they can get themselves, which is usually nothing. Sharing is the bright outlook, a magnet for good things, that almost permanent smile, that look that everything will be OK if you let it and not drag whatever it is around with you seeking pity or worse sympathy (failure). Sharing is that feeling that life contains more than what we see there is a depth to it that fills us with greatness, humility and at times positive direction and uplifting thoughts, it challenges the morbid and opens the flood gates to aspects of life that we never knew existed. But like attracts like and so again the lesser souls of thought get attracted to the lesser souls of thought and continually then wonder why others have the smiles when they perpetually look glum or scornful.

Sharing is not imposing, it's not being a burden, it's not being taken advantage of, it's not being negative, real sharing is a homogeneous aspect of bonding with certain others in life and combining what's naturally inherent, it's that great "oneness" feeling that humans have built within that explodes and causes genuine concern and laughter in the same sentence. That one can speak without premeditated thought and just say it as it comes, it's a real freedom that very little else can qualify the same effect. And for those that make up endless excuses as to why they haven't any friends (and the list is endless) it says more about them than and that sharing is a step too far in their life or indeed vocabulary. If you can't share you can't live life to the full, everything is contrived and excuse ridden and situationally driven as to what value you place on what and if I do this maybe they'll do that, life accounts in life are people who are failures let loose. If it doesn't come from the heart and you have to justify everything or "I did this they did that" attitude then you will always live below what expectation you would wish to enjoy, and the very sad thing is that it's you who has devised that route.  Sharing denotes with a firm presence of love and warmth towards others that's sincere and generous unlike those that have little sharing ability because there is little else within that's of any value or worth.

For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
(These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others)

FAILURE

Failure is a word that many people shy away from, it's not nice to be classed as a failure, or to have something not go the way it should have thus it's a failure. But failure has been given a bad name by inept people who basically do nothing themselves and these are the real failures. Without failure there would be no success whatsoever, and indeed is failure as designated by the onlookers really failure because many a time when things go wrong it's not failure it's vast experience and understanding of why things didn't quite go right and thus we are now the better and more wiser to both deal with and tackle life and the problems ahead of us. It's just so easy for the armchair experts to exert their dull formulaic logic on to those who have earnestly and dejectedly tried to forge a designed result and not to have met with those expectations. It's thanks to failures that many of us are still alive and kicking today even the critics of those who once seemingly failed yet in that plight sought the real truth and knowledge and ways to overcome and succeed way beyond expectations and often with heightened success at that.

Scientists, pharmacists, engineers often fail almost daily in their lives for years on end trying to find solutions, cures, technological advances, yet persevere they do until that 'ureka' moment comes along and mankind is better all around for that result. Many a business mogul can relate to failure more than once sometimes through no fault or bad judgement of their own, just circumstantial aspects have overtaken all their planning and pushed parameters beyond the potential buffering to withstand it all. So many small business men and women struggle beyond belief in getting their own businesses up and running making at times great sacrifices in order to keep the wheels turning, but like everything else perseverance pays off even if the route at times is more like a ride on the big dipper. The media and the backseat drivers judge the value and worth of those by what they perceive and can see, and fine let them, because the real successes are those who just "go for it" fighting at times against the odds and negative conditions. But as soon as it all changes then what a turnaround, but then your hard earned work pays off as you literally have life in your grasp and not that of those who judge without cause other than to make themselves feel better.

If you've ever hit the buffers running, turned down endless 'dead ends' being pushed by those who know more, looked down upon by the arrogant and egotists, being scorned by your family for not doing what they think, brushed aside by those that haven't a clue what you are doing nor want to know, rest assured that the knowledge you have is just fabulous, in that you have it all over and above everyone else. Even if at times you feel like you are walking in deep mud or swimming against the tide take heart that aircraft always fly against the wind and what a success they are, salmon swim against the currents and survive because of it. You don't have to follow the herd as there are no rules in life everything has its place. Failure isn't an option, it's just a generic term spewed out by those who can't justify an explanation, you know better and that smile that hides the inner tears and struggle is the first sign of overwhelming success, even if you think it's nowhere to be seen. So many people whether in a recession or not are at that 'tipping point' and like seeds in the ground nothing happenes for ages until one day those little green shoots start poking through.

There are no runways in life nor vertical takeoffs either, and whilst it may seem like that for some everyone has to put up with conditions that they never expected and at times some have to start again from scratch. Whatever your dream, goal, endeavour, it's you who are both the backbone and success, and not achieving your goal isn't failure, often what amounts to the end result has so much been modified because of new understandings, opportunities, technology, circumstances, etc, that whatever the result you're a success and failure as it were en-route has made you the ebullient lord of your domain, no one else. Never be put off by others negativity or not reaching what you set out to do, there isn't a company that hasn't had to change tack en-route to survive and accommodate updated circumstances and opportunities. Let nothing put you off the route to where your heart lies, and if one sees in history those that were told that they would never amount to anything, were told by those who had no vision themselves, and one such person told that ended up one President of America.

For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
(These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others)

STABILITY

The major problems affecting people in the West are those associated with the self, that is not material problems but mental scenarios that are difficult for many to get to grips with or come to terms with.  Ironically within our own reality many material things exist on our 'want list' and that in itself creates further mental unrest as we deem materialism as almost essential to us either moving forward or becoming more 'established' or fulfilling our desire to be whatever it is we desire. It can be such a lonely and narrow pathway we create as we build up an image of how we wish to be and present ourselves to the outside world that we lose the reality of what it is that we do best and our own personality. So many people face the possibility of failure because they take the wrong trajectory or tack in life based upon what they think as opposed to what they know and an almost immediate struggle is self created and it need not be so. The dichotomy of life of how we see it and how others see us at the same time walking together to reach our goals is at times so different that if analysed we would not recognise what is taking place and who is doing what either. Such confusion is getting more common as people tend to relinquish ownership of themselves and base it upon a mixture of hypothetical ideals of others, perceptions, incorrect thoughts and following others who they have little idea as to how they made the grade and what they encountered en-route.

Everywhere one goes we are bombarded with sales, concocted ideals, perceived and created realities all drawn up by a collection of thoughts and sales pitches that are designed to pull those insecure heart strings, those excitable areas of potential and the hope of better things to come but very little chance of it ever reaching a glimmer of success as it's all hollow, shallow and grossly insincere. Time lines are the biggest failure areas that people seem to omit in their thinking, what someone did there, then, at that time, with those circumstances, with their parameters, etc, etc, doesn't exist anymore. And whilst their modus operandi is good and solid the detail surrounding it all doesn't exist anymore either, it was all in the past. Such books that purport to give one the clues or steps to success are really a biography of those that have made it and whilst logic prevails throughout the guarantee of it happening to you are minimal at best. Entrepreneurs just "do it", if you need endless motivational tools then your chances are already reduced and whilst motivation is always good it doesn't carry any backup so failure or gross disappointment or worse 'still can't work' with the new learn-ed knowledge because it doesn't quite compute in the mind leaves many frustrated and resigned to falling back on themselves.

Our stability is essential if we are to think clearly, sleep well and face the future no matter what happens. There are no magic wands out there so we have to be realistic as to where we want to go, what we have to accept (which is hard for many as they think they deserve more) and what is the potential again realistically for the future. Striving for a dream is wasting your time and boring those around you. It doesn't mean negating a goal but placing everything in a reality scenario because unless we actively embark upon something it's never ever going to happen. Stability is to do with US and no one else, we can't apportion him, her, this, that, because, they, or anything else, it's all down to us to sort out and not wait for others to change or circumstance to change to suite us, that's pathetic. Placing the onus on areas that we have no control over isn't smart, we have a lot of clout ourselves and ability to alter many things, laziness is the biggest obstacle and thus the "self" is the biggest problem we will ever have to face.
 
For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
FREE "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com
John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012

BEING ADULT ABOUT LIFE

So many arguments are caused by juvenile thoughts and pure selfish feelings. The majority of relationship breakdowns are because of selfishness more than anything else oh, and of course a real lack of true love. We talk about love quite a lot there are films and TV programmes splattered all around us about love stories usually those that go wrong as hysterical drama can be interjected in to it. Happy endings rarely move an audience even if a few tears are shed towards the end. Do we know what real love is all about once the initial infatuation calms down and life starts to wash away the clouds of bliss as the odd storm brews up in the distance? Do we look differently at our partner and think they could be better or do better or that we haven't after all that much in common for the long run?  Of course these are failings in us and our ego and our attitude and our self esteem and the self itself, it's usually about our own self that we let ourselves down terribly with, not someone else, although we don't usually like to admit it. Our temperament can be up and down like a yo-yo and thus we have mood swings that reflect that up and down feeling as we tend to let everyone know for that subliminal cry for attention to try and zest things up again. It rarely works as after a while everyone knows you for who and what you are, which doesn't mean you are a bad person nor anything else, just dull and predictive. We can also be forever analytical which then removes much of what life is all about as we tend then to miss the crux of what it really all means and the nuances that can't easily be categorised.

Alternatively we can can be one of those self created morons that is politically correct, and there is no legislation pertaining to such so it's a self made stance which means you are dancing on dangerous ground as it's all based upon your perception not the reality of others. If you harbour political correctness as a means of moving forward the chances are you won't, as you'll forever be frightened to speak your mind or allow others to do the same so nothing predominantly happens. It's often a failure mentality and depicts one of lesser strength, if others get upset then let them deal with it, it's not for to you offer yourself as some self proclaimed bastion of society that no one wants and in the process holding everyone back. Understanding the bigger picture is always a good thing yet few ever do they never rise to that thought process yet then wonder why they are forever in the doldrums seeing life as an obstacle in itself and not fair and wallowing in the detritus because they can never seem to float to the surface.

Selfishness is a pre-cursor to many problems in life, loneliness, lack of relationships and commitment, mental instability, distrust, unhappiness, warped thoughts, self denial, fear of spending too much time with others - no matter how close they may be. Zealously enhanced distance relationships via email, Facebook, Twitter or other social media platform, quirkiness, fragmented life, etc, it's all to do with an almost pivotless sense of me, me and of course me. We have options and choices so we take the route that we think is applicable to us, rightly or wrongly who knows. Nothing is without consequences good or not so good, and in the overall view it matters not to others as it's our own personal life and we migrate towards those that share our view and personality even if it is from afar and see only small chunks we empathise with. Actually living in close proximity with our distant contacts could lead to everything we like about someone come toppling down in an instant such is our cultivated relationship that even if deeply motivated and concurrent on many topics is never the less fragile in context.

Understanding ourselves and not trying to think another way over the reality of whom we are makes for a greater understanding and a degree of increased happiness as we know why things are as they are and not ponder upon such variables then wonder why, again brushing over on the reality side of events. Our "love walk" should see us through, for where our "love walk" is evident so is that little voice telling us what is right or not so, and yes we do have "override" we can latch on to, but override is just that and it's tantamount to to lying to ourselves, which is the last thing we should do. We can hypothesise until the day we die yet it won't change the truth even if we don't really want to believe there is one. We can try and be another Peter Pan and pretend that we are not getting older and that life in the main is for others, but it isn't, we are part of getting old and life does zoom by even if our Dorian Grey attitude temporarily makes us feel better. At some stage everything comes home to roost and at some stage we look upon life and not see what we have done but where are we now, for that is where we live and breath.

For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
FREE "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com
John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012

BALANCE & POLARITY

Every day we need some degree of focus in our lives otherwise we end up doing very little that assists us, just playing for time and not getting to grips with what we could do. In the same vein we need balance too for without balance we veer off into a tangent that's at times steeped in bias and we can then get bogged down and come to a stand still. Every day we have to take on its merit, some days we are full of inspiration and get up and go, others we just seem to be treading water even though there is perhaps lots to do or be getting on with. Life is like that, it's not plain sailing, and steering our ship means we have to accommodate and navigate what is ahead of us, from a calm sea a storm can brew in minutes and we need to be mindful of it. We also need to be mindful that our inner self wants to do something and we just don't have that motivation to do it, at least at a certain time, writers have "writers block" where they just can't think the story line anymore, but it comes and goes and all is well again. Getting upset or remorseful isn't an answer which needs to be entertained because if we dwell on these events we can severely damage our intent by thwarting our inner self to bounce back quicker than it could do.

Every action we make has a reflex action, sometimes it's barely recognisable other times it can have profound repercussions not only on the self but on others and situations around us. That's not to say that we should never make such actions that have wide ranging repercussions because progress is primarily held back by the 'stick in the muds' and those that can't stand change, so we need to state our case and go for it, if we can't do that for ourselves no one else can. We are not by and large responsible for others actions nor others getting upset or in today's parlance "offended", which seems all too easy. And that not everything we do is going to please everybody nor be conducive to their circumstances and that change may have to be effected, but then so be it, it's just others looking after themselves or the selfish making a noise which they always do every day they don't get their way.  Life is a series of options some have to be taken into account and a decision made others are optional and just give us a latitude in what is available for us. Whatever there is available there are consequences even if some seem of little or no value, but what is of no value to one person could be of great importance to another for their own reasons, keeping an open mind helps one along on their way in life without encompassing needless unrest from others.

Balance is a prime factor in everything, we know only too well that eating our favourite foods to excess causes us to get fat, drinking too much gives us a hangover, lounging around chilling out stops us getting essential exercise and we become sluggish both physically and mentally, and so on. Balance keeps things fresh in excess we get fed up after a while if not indeed go off whatever it was, so a healthy balance in our work and social life promotes a degree of alertness that's essential to us living a good and happier life. When life gets us down our ability to see clearly and correctly comes under pressure which does us no good at all we need a good and balanced view in order to see the pros and cons of each aspect of our thoughts and a degree of polarity so that we know why we are making the decisions we are. Without polarity we become aimless and that has negative aspects in itself which we ultimately will suffer from. Regardless of how something grabs you, whether it sounds fine or it's discordant, don't let your emotions step in before you've had chance to think about it otherwise on the spot reactions can turn out to be remorseful and one can easily say the wrong thing.

For more www.thelifedoctor.info
Free "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com
©John Rushton / The Life Alchemist 2012