THE FUN AND JOY IN LIFE

Everything in life is a matter of balance, it's also a culmination of our take on life too, which incorporates our thoughts, feelings, understanding and those horrible elements negative emotions that include, greed, jealousy, anger, envy, ego, arrogance, you know them all only too well. It's the latter that sets our threshold on how we enjoy life and are able we are to laugh. It's not logic unfortunately that sets the terms even though it should be to a large extent, coupled with a sprinkling of sheer and outright positivity, it's those negative thoughts that wade in and pull us down. We know when we are with friends that we can laugh at almost anything and do, the silliest thing or personal comments about others or whatever it is bodes well for lots of laughter we feel comfortable, ourselves and for a few moments life's stresses and strains fade into insignificance, where they should be. However time goes by and we are soon back on our own pathway and the laughter seems an age away even if only a matter of hours in reality. We come across, financial stresses, work related problems or loss of work, we see outside events that encompass our lives by default, they are not invited but enter anyway, and we see parameters change before our eyes which destabilises us no end.

But over and above all of these things we can laugh, we can enjoy life, we can commune and we can go forward. We are still the masters of our own destiny and if we controlled our thoughts as opposed to letting them control us we would with immediate effect elevate ourselves to a level where life would take on a new meaning and we would see elements and routes and pathways that before eluded us. It's not that all our problems would suddenly vanish but we would be in pole position to life and not a default follower that looks forlorn and withdrawn seeking only highlights to make the bits in between worthwhile. Fun and joy exist every day no matter where you are but if one is to enjoy it all there has to be that conduit to enjoyment that's common to all parties. If someone is not going to laugh at something because they think that the situation that they are in doesn't warrant it then they are forcing unhappiness on themselves. Many people have this pathetic and misplaced thought and ideology that if something is wrong or not going well they can't laugh, or at a funeral they can't smile or indeed laugh even if it's sharing good moments of the past of the deceased, this is a stupid fallacy and self created situation that has neither merit nor logic. And as to the thought "what will others think" whose life are you living yours or theirs? Never bring yourself down or make yourself drab for the sake of others there's no respect or disrespect in that at all it's third world twaddle for low minded people and failures.

The lightness of life the bit that gives us meaning and purpose is akin to being able to see more than one side of anything and that includes any humorous elements or those element within those that work with us. People who can generally laugh are more honest and trustworthy than those that can't or don't, they are more creative and strangely enough more Godly too as they see compassion, love and understanding whereas the morbid zealots see evil and malice as the first point of call. Apart from the devised advertisements where people are made to laugh to try and give credibility, smiling and laughing does give one a better opportunity to connect and be open to connection via others especially strangers who know nothing of or about you. Our "shop window" speaks volumes about us if it's bright and warm then it's attractive to most if it's dull then it attracts the few who are predominantly dull too as the rest take one glance and move onwards. Enjoying the moment is the key to life, if we seek enjoyment via something materialistic which would give us fleeting joy or a situation or happening in the future then we 'postpone happiness' confining ourselves to what we are daily living through as just 'ordinary' and as humans we are anything but, or at least most aren't. Choices abound in life and happiness is a choice (yes it is no muttering here) as is to laugh and smile, it comes from within you and nowhere else, so decide where you want to go and and what you want to be and do it. The way you do it will define where you end up. Now make your choice.    

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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
 (These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others),

PURSUING HAPPINESS or CREATING HAPPINESS

Which category do you fall into - a pursuer or a creator of happiness, or haven't you thought about it. Or are you a dabbler in all of them, do you perceive you are happy then at the same time try to see if you could be happier or want to read the odd article on happiness just in case you think you've missed something? Many people fall into the latter situation in that they are relatively happy yet still are interested in what others have to say as if walking around them are experts on the subject. And in fact many writers on the subject of happiness are far from it themselves, they are so conversed with the theoretical technicalities that their heart is stone cold and they look at everything strategically as opposed to humanely and tabulate rules as if they have found a formula, whereas they haven't at all, it's all mumbo jumbo in their minds. If you pursue happiness then you have not only lost the plot already there is something wrong with how you think, feel and perceive life which will definitely have a bearing upon your life and your interaction with every area within it. Similarly is you see others as enjoying life or even worse the sadness that's around as opposed to the happiness around then you've got a real mind shift that's verging on the negativity of life and again that will affect your judgement and thoughts and perceptions in every thing you do and every area of life in fact you are probably as exciting as dish water in your outlook.

Society for many appears to have lost what is basically inherent within, and when something isn't quite what it should believe that there is somewhere a "Help Line" or a potion at the Pharmacy which will quickly and effectively like a laxative get you going once again, and when they find that there isn't such a thing an almost inner panic sets up as to "now what". Fortunately most people are happy all around the world, something I've seen and experienced first hand, and whilst some cultures are a bit dull and subservient the overall effects of happiness are to be seen. Many single people today predominantly women over 30 but not exclusively seem to find happiness hard, it's not that men of similar circumstances don't it's just that their minds are more logical and thus tend to accept it more and just do what they have to do to get the best out of life, even if it isn't much in reality. (set in your ways syndrome).

Happiness is a state of being, you create it no one can create it for you nor enjoy it for you, your mind is where you live nowhere else so it's your outlook, perception, mind thoughts that produce the outward signs of happiness regardless of circumstances and situations. Everything is you, so blaming everything and anything isn't an answer. You have to live with yourself 24/7 no one else, not even your partner, so if you can't do it for yourself or you allow negative emotions, greed, anger, jealousy, moodiness, selfishness, envy, pride, etc, to take over, then they will, no one can do anything about it but you. If you compare your life or aspects of it to others the you'll always feel down, if you have permanent grand ideas and want then you'll always fail, if you have aspects of jealousy or the "it's not fair" mentality then it won't be fair ever. If you treat life as 'you' and 'everyone else' then that's how it will be, if you make yourself moody and selfish then you will lose everything, if you can't make an effort no one else will help you why should they you are worthless by your own actions. If you can't find "real" friends then it's you not because they don't exist, no excuses as to location of lifestyle it's you firmly and squarely. You are the interface with life no one else, you have happiness built in, like a new car with all the gadgets, if you don't use them so be it, but don't complain they don't work when you can't be bothered to click the buttons.

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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
(These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others)

STABILITY

The major problems affecting people in the West are those associated with the self, that is not material problems but mental scenarios that are difficult for many to get to grips with or come to terms with.  Ironically within our own reality many material things exist on our 'want list' and that in itself creates further mental unrest as we deem materialism as almost essential to us either moving forward or becoming more 'established' or fulfilling our desire to be whatever it is we desire. It can be such a lonely and narrow pathway we create as we build up an image of how we wish to be and present ourselves to the outside world that we lose the reality of what it is that we do best and our own personality. So many people face the possibility of failure because they take the wrong trajectory or tack in life based upon what they think as opposed to what they know and an almost immediate struggle is self created and it need not be so. The dichotomy of life of how we see it and how others see us at the same time walking together to reach our goals is at times so different that if analysed we would not recognise what is taking place and who is doing what either. Such confusion is getting more common as people tend to relinquish ownership of themselves and base it upon a mixture of hypothetical ideals of others, perceptions, incorrect thoughts and following others who they have little idea as to how they made the grade and what they encountered en-route.

Everywhere one goes we are bombarded with sales, concocted ideals, perceived and created realities all drawn up by a collection of thoughts and sales pitches that are designed to pull those insecure heart strings, those excitable areas of potential and the hope of better things to come but very little chance of it ever reaching a glimmer of success as it's all hollow, shallow and grossly insincere. Time lines are the biggest failure areas that people seem to omit in their thinking, what someone did there, then, at that time, with those circumstances, with their parameters, etc, etc, doesn't exist anymore. And whilst their modus operandi is good and solid the detail surrounding it all doesn't exist anymore either, it was all in the past. Such books that purport to give one the clues or steps to success are really a biography of those that have made it and whilst logic prevails throughout the guarantee of it happening to you are minimal at best. Entrepreneurs just "do it", if you need endless motivational tools then your chances are already reduced and whilst motivation is always good it doesn't carry any backup so failure or gross disappointment or worse 'still can't work' with the new learn-ed knowledge because it doesn't quite compute in the mind leaves many frustrated and resigned to falling back on themselves.

Our stability is essential if we are to think clearly, sleep well and face the future no matter what happens. There are no magic wands out there so we have to be realistic as to where we want to go, what we have to accept (which is hard for many as they think they deserve more) and what is the potential again realistically for the future. Striving for a dream is wasting your time and boring those around you. It doesn't mean negating a goal but placing everything in a reality scenario because unless we actively embark upon something it's never ever going to happen. Stability is to do with US and no one else, we can't apportion him, her, this, that, because, they, or anything else, it's all down to us to sort out and not wait for others to change or circumstance to change to suite us, that's pathetic. Placing the onus on areas that we have no control over isn't smart, we have a lot of clout ourselves and ability to alter many things, laziness is the biggest obstacle and thus the "self" is the biggest problem we will ever have to face.
 
For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
FREE "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com
John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012

WHEN IT REALLY DOESN'T MATTER

The saying 'a little learning is a dangerous thing' can be for some almost fatal. Biologically we have almost identical systems but literally how it's wired and how it performs can vary enormously. Like identical computers what we load it with is akin to what we want out of it and how we are to use it. Those that have a quest for knowledge are more aptly devised to process efficiently all the intake of information they receive. Those of a lesser state of development which happens to be the majority of people take in bouts of knowledge and don't efficiently process it, nor do they have the capacity to see the "bigger picture" and thus go off on a tangent of their own making and then wonder why life isn't what it should be or it isn't fair. The media delve into others lives, people's state of affairs, often really dull and boring stuff and it's picked up usually by dull and boring people as they have little else to do in their introverted thought processes.  None of the information having any bearing upon whoever reads it and thus is immaterial to their lives. No one is indispensable, if the Heads of State in  all Europe and the USA died over night, life would still carry on the following day, they would be history within a week as the new incumbents would be the flavour of the day and being live have more to offer than a corpse who has no further use. Respect for the dead is something that doesn't exist, it means nothing, no matter what you felt of them either personally or with regards their imprint on humanity, which few have, it's just a mind thought, admiration can live on respecting the dead is hollow.

The number one person in your life is you, it has to be you, you have to be the centre of your universe and not some alien atom floating around the nucleus of another being or life. It's not being selfish nor self centred, if you can't do something for yourself then no one else can either. Once you are "at one" with yourself then you have the perfect ability to do whatever you want and help others you deem are significant in your life. Your whole "love walk" the co-existing element in humanity thrives on you being able and secure in whom you are, for without either you dither and procrastinate and have little to offer anyone as ones existence become a trudging concept that overrules all the fun, the enjoyment, the grace, the enhancement and creativity that is out there awaiting you. The global state of mental health that Western countries are facing is all bound in others being too nosey into others lives, it's not a healthy caring scenario, it's almost of voyeuristic proportions and linked to the self, which is a self poison which doesn't rest well and produces negativity, stress, anxiety and daub. However, we have choices in what we do and say, whom we look up to and who we possibly despise like despots and the Islamic suicide bombers, who seem to be forever growing such is their religious instability.

To clear the mind of extraneous garbage one must have a self focus and subliminally have a list of importance placed upon each, not a cheap second hand thrill but a real purpose for what one deems are relevant to life for if this is not in evidence then much of the self thought is superfluous and without merit and over burdensome to what one thinks and feels about. Our attitude is paramount to how we live our lives and enjoy life, if we are overruled by negative emotions such as ego, anger, greed, pride, arrogance, etc, then whatever is ahead of us will always be second best no matter what it is. We will not see clearly because of the self created fog thus we cocoon ourselves in a diatribe of high pent up negativity and stress and badness. Where the love walk doesn't exist our minds focus on what others have negating what we can do to improve our lot. Where love meets consciousness on a higher level the resultant is all seeing and all knowing to a degree that one is more secure and easily ready to understand what was previously not understandable, it's a freeing of the mind and soul without any negative feedback nor inner acquiescing to any other state that may be circling around us. 

If we only held on to what is important, whatever that is to each and every one of us how much lighter life would be. Reciting the bad news spewed out by the television and radio does nothing to promote ourselves especially when over 95% of it is beyond our control or ability to change. Being informed is one thing, harbouring such thoughts as a means of trying to be 'smart' or up to date in conversation speaks of a low mentality and one which will suffer the penalty of negativity. Negativity in any guise forms an automatic lowness which eventually permeates every fibre of our system, it has to as if we feed ourselves garbage it has to go somewhere. Good thoughts always uplift, it's no option because goodness is by definition uplifting and where such upliftment occurs so does a calmer and more sedate and understanding mind. If you've tried being a know all stop it and reside on a need to know basis, allow what can't be changed or you have no control over to be as they are or stories about others who you will never meet or see or have any connection with float on by. They are not number one, you are.

For more www.thelifedoctor.info
Free "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com
©John Rushton / The Life Alchemist 2012