OUT OF SORTS WITH LIFE

How we feel about life varies from moment to moment, sometimes we just feel "out of it" for no apparent reason, other times there are a number of issues going through our minds and at other moments we just lose focus on whom we are where we are going and that possibly life isn't offering much in the area of stimulus or excitement. Our reality is what we live in, whatever life is or isn't it's our take on it that makes us think and feel the way we do. Our reality can make our lives or lead us down a road of hard work and toil, it can cloud our judgement, our thoughts, our feelings, our clarity and our overall happiness factor. Whatever we experience we process it via our minds and take whatever course of action we deem appropriate including becoming remorse, miserable and sullen, it's self pity taking over but the bottom line is it's you who has instigated it, no one else. There is no such thing as "well you'd be like this if you had ..... " or "life has made me this way" life has done no such thing, if you want to be selfish and small minded that's a choice you have made, it's not like a virus that you can pick up. Of course mild forms of depression are a different matter, often circumstances and solutions weight heavily and we can't process it all proficiently enough so we go into a dull state of regressive thought, yet here again many induce such a state on to themselves as they actually feel it's a worthy and plausible thing to do which gains a degree of respect, where did that notion ever come from?  Some even think it's smart to say "I'm depressed", "I'm stressed" and throw in the Hollywood drama of responses and toned voice as if it heightens their credibility factor.

There is only one way to deal with life being out of sorts and that is to literally deal with it yourself by not giving in and making yourself feel bad. Everything has a lifespan, both good and bad things come to an end and circumstances change but facing up to adversity is by far the best way to keep your mind, body and soul in pristine condition and enjoy the life ride as opposed to enduring it then harbouring the memories. For those who were seeking an easy option or an answer that's far easier and there are many who perpetually seek the easy way if foolishly, you reap what you sow. For those that "get on" in life and just "do it" the rewards are great as is self confidence, understanding, compassion, drive, happiness and fortitude. If we can't keep a good council then no one else can do it for us no matter how much they want to. What goes on in our heads is ours and only ours and no manner of help, advice or strategies given by others will change how you think unless you want that to happen.

Life is what it is, it doesn't have the ability to make a choice for you or want to make it extra nice because it likes you or wants to "get back" at you because it doesn't, it's not that fragile nor thoughtful. Life is exactly what it is and that's a culmination of endless options and permutations coming together all at once all the time, hence change happens sometimes suddenly other times gradually, but change never the less happens. Life can throw into our pathway a demagogue of  choices all of which are not so savoury, similarly even the good choices have repercussions and strings to them. Our own verve and tenacity pulls us through, bestows a degree of authority, success and knowledge and it goes officially under the banner of experience. Whether we take heed of that experience and decide regardless to enjoy life is down to us, it's not a point of discussion for friends nor anyone else. The more we decide to enjoy and not be a sponge to what's around us the better life will not only become but our whole attitude and the attitude of others around us will improve and before we know it there will be an uplift from where we were to a more positive and refreshing stance in life. If we challenge the good to find credibility with the option of reverting back to bad if it doesn't pan out then you are really pathetic and need to alter your complete ideology about yourself and life. Like attracts like and negativity attracts negativity, positivity attracts positivity, your option, your choice.

For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
FREE "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com
RADIO : www.liferadiointernational.com
©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
 (These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others),

THE FUN AND JOY IN LIFE

Everything in life is a matter of balance, it's also a culmination of our take on life too, which incorporates our thoughts, feelings, understanding and those horrible elements negative emotions that include, greed, jealousy, anger, envy, ego, arrogance, you know them all only too well. It's the latter that sets our threshold on how we enjoy life and are able we are to laugh. It's not logic unfortunately that sets the terms even though it should be to a large extent, coupled with a sprinkling of sheer and outright positivity, it's those negative thoughts that wade in and pull us down. We know when we are with friends that we can laugh at almost anything and do, the silliest thing or personal comments about others or whatever it is bodes well for lots of laughter we feel comfortable, ourselves and for a few moments life's stresses and strains fade into insignificance, where they should be. However time goes by and we are soon back on our own pathway and the laughter seems an age away even if only a matter of hours in reality. We come across, financial stresses, work related problems or loss of work, we see outside events that encompass our lives by default, they are not invited but enter anyway, and we see parameters change before our eyes which destabilises us no end.

But over and above all of these things we can laugh, we can enjoy life, we can commune and we can go forward. We are still the masters of our own destiny and if we controlled our thoughts as opposed to letting them control us we would with immediate effect elevate ourselves to a level where life would take on a new meaning and we would see elements and routes and pathways that before eluded us. It's not that all our problems would suddenly vanish but we would be in pole position to life and not a default follower that looks forlorn and withdrawn seeking only highlights to make the bits in between worthwhile. Fun and joy exist every day no matter where you are but if one is to enjoy it all there has to be that conduit to enjoyment that's common to all parties. If someone is not going to laugh at something because they think that the situation that they are in doesn't warrant it then they are forcing unhappiness on themselves. Many people have this pathetic and misplaced thought and ideology that if something is wrong or not going well they can't laugh, or at a funeral they can't smile or indeed laugh even if it's sharing good moments of the past of the deceased, this is a stupid fallacy and self created situation that has neither merit nor logic. And as to the thought "what will others think" whose life are you living yours or theirs? Never bring yourself down or make yourself drab for the sake of others there's no respect or disrespect in that at all it's third world twaddle for low minded people and failures.

The lightness of life the bit that gives us meaning and purpose is akin to being able to see more than one side of anything and that includes any humorous elements or those element within those that work with us. People who can generally laugh are more honest and trustworthy than those that can't or don't, they are more creative and strangely enough more Godly too as they see compassion, love and understanding whereas the morbid zealots see evil and malice as the first point of call. Apart from the devised advertisements where people are made to laugh to try and give credibility, smiling and laughing does give one a better opportunity to connect and be open to connection via others especially strangers who know nothing of or about you. Our "shop window" speaks volumes about us if it's bright and warm then it's attractive to most if it's dull then it attracts the few who are predominantly dull too as the rest take one glance and move onwards. Enjoying the moment is the key to life, if we seek enjoyment via something materialistic which would give us fleeting joy or a situation or happening in the future then we 'postpone happiness' confining ourselves to what we are daily living through as just 'ordinary' and as humans we are anything but, or at least most aren't. Choices abound in life and happiness is a choice (yes it is no muttering here) as is to laugh and smile, it comes from within you and nowhere else, so decide where you want to go and and what you want to be and do it. The way you do it will define where you end up. Now make your choice.    

For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
FREE "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com
RADIO : www.liferadiointernational.com
©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
 (These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others),

SHARING - THAT FEELING

One of the greatest feelings you can ever have is that of sharing, sharing moments with strangers via a common understanding of whatever has happened or been seen, even without saying a word. Or most deeply heartwarming is that of the sharing of loved ones and friends a part of your life regardless of the incident or situation. Even sharing a moment together of great distress is a moment in reflection of the gratitude of that person being there at that time that helped so much and brought a real presence of what life and humanity is all about. There's nothing better than being able to share your partner, your children, your parents, your very close friends that at times are even closer than relatives. The feeling that you can say and do and confide and be silly (or worse) in their company and laugh it all off because they not only love you but respect you and deep down like to feel that when you share you share, it's not a conditional relationship it's "anything goes" and you both or all lap it all up for what it''s worth. That warm comforting feeling, that almost smug feeling on invincibility that life just can't get better that material values are at those moments just worthless as they are objects without heart or soul.

It's essential to us all that we can share with others for if we don't or can't then it makes us both hard within and forms a mental barrier that hinders our ability to communicate efficiently and with depth. Sharing with pertinent others also allows us to share with those we don't like or don't trust or those who are in effect down right rude to us too, and stops offence being taken as well as getting upset by others saying either deliberately or out of turn things we find distasteful or possibly hurtful. Sharing creates a brighter mind and elevates life shunning out loneliness and selfishness which can be crippling and debilitating for the self and life. Sharing on a humanitarian basis not the sharing which is "all about me" enables productivity, trust, respect, faith, creativity, opportunity, advancement, purpose and an overall feeling of well being regardless of any overall circumstances. People who share are more apt to "read situations" as they are lighter in their minds and can see troubles and others faults far more than those who keep to themselves everything for a whole range of fears about letting go and thus destroying themselves or worse.

But sharing isn't telling everyone everything about you, it's not being that proverbial "open book"  it's allowing others to 'meld' with you, to feel the real truth of life and whatever else transpires needs a high degree of respect and inner value to come forth, which separates those out who are only in life for what they can get themselves, which is usually nothing. Sharing is the bright outlook, a magnet for good things, that almost permanent smile, that look that everything will be OK if you let it and not drag whatever it is around with you seeking pity or worse sympathy (failure). Sharing is that feeling that life contains more than what we see there is a depth to it that fills us with greatness, humility and at times positive direction and uplifting thoughts, it challenges the morbid and opens the flood gates to aspects of life that we never knew existed. But like attracts like and so again the lesser souls of thought get attracted to the lesser souls of thought and continually then wonder why others have the smiles when they perpetually look glum or scornful.

Sharing is not imposing, it's not being a burden, it's not being taken advantage of, it's not being negative, real sharing is a homogeneous aspect of bonding with certain others in life and combining what's naturally inherent, it's that great "oneness" feeling that humans have built within that explodes and causes genuine concern and laughter in the same sentence. That one can speak without premeditated thought and just say it as it comes, it's a real freedom that very little else can qualify the same effect. And for those that make up endless excuses as to why they haven't any friends (and the list is endless) it says more about them than and that sharing is a step too far in their life or indeed vocabulary. If you can't share you can't live life to the full, everything is contrived and excuse ridden and situationally driven as to what value you place on what and if I do this maybe they'll do that, life accounts in life are people who are failures let loose. If it doesn't come from the heart and you have to justify everything or "I did this they did that" attitude then you will always live below what expectation you would wish to enjoy, and the very sad thing is that it's you who has devised that route.  Sharing denotes with a firm presence of love and warmth towards others that's sincere and generous unlike those that have little sharing ability because there is little else within that's of any value or worth.

For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
FREE "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com
RADIO : www.liferadiointernational.com
©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
(These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others)

BEING ADULT ABOUT LIFE

So many arguments are caused by juvenile thoughts and pure selfish feelings. The majority of relationship breakdowns are because of selfishness more than anything else oh, and of course a real lack of true love. We talk about love quite a lot there are films and TV programmes splattered all around us about love stories usually those that go wrong as hysterical drama can be interjected in to it. Happy endings rarely move an audience even if a few tears are shed towards the end. Do we know what real love is all about once the initial infatuation calms down and life starts to wash away the clouds of bliss as the odd storm brews up in the distance? Do we look differently at our partner and think they could be better or do better or that we haven't after all that much in common for the long run?  Of course these are failings in us and our ego and our attitude and our self esteem and the self itself, it's usually about our own self that we let ourselves down terribly with, not someone else, although we don't usually like to admit it. Our temperament can be up and down like a yo-yo and thus we have mood swings that reflect that up and down feeling as we tend to let everyone know for that subliminal cry for attention to try and zest things up again. It rarely works as after a while everyone knows you for who and what you are, which doesn't mean you are a bad person nor anything else, just dull and predictive. We can also be forever analytical which then removes much of what life is all about as we tend then to miss the crux of what it really all means and the nuances that can't easily be categorised.

Alternatively we can can be one of those self created morons that is politically correct, and there is no legislation pertaining to such so it's a self made stance which means you are dancing on dangerous ground as it's all based upon your perception not the reality of others. If you harbour political correctness as a means of moving forward the chances are you won't, as you'll forever be frightened to speak your mind or allow others to do the same so nothing predominantly happens. It's often a failure mentality and depicts one of lesser strength, if others get upset then let them deal with it, it's not for to you offer yourself as some self proclaimed bastion of society that no one wants and in the process holding everyone back. Understanding the bigger picture is always a good thing yet few ever do they never rise to that thought process yet then wonder why they are forever in the doldrums seeing life as an obstacle in itself and not fair and wallowing in the detritus because they can never seem to float to the surface.

Selfishness is a pre-cursor to many problems in life, loneliness, lack of relationships and commitment, mental instability, distrust, unhappiness, warped thoughts, self denial, fear of spending too much time with others - no matter how close they may be. Zealously enhanced distance relationships via email, Facebook, Twitter or other social media platform, quirkiness, fragmented life, etc, it's all to do with an almost pivotless sense of me, me and of course me. We have options and choices so we take the route that we think is applicable to us, rightly or wrongly who knows. Nothing is without consequences good or not so good, and in the overall view it matters not to others as it's our own personal life and we migrate towards those that share our view and personality even if it is from afar and see only small chunks we empathise with. Actually living in close proximity with our distant contacts could lead to everything we like about someone come toppling down in an instant such is our cultivated relationship that even if deeply motivated and concurrent on many topics is never the less fragile in context.

Understanding ourselves and not trying to think another way over the reality of whom we are makes for a greater understanding and a degree of increased happiness as we know why things are as they are and not ponder upon such variables then wonder why, again brushing over on the reality side of events. Our "love walk" should see us through, for where our "love walk" is evident so is that little voice telling us what is right or not so, and yes we do have "override" we can latch on to, but override is just that and it's tantamount to to lying to ourselves, which is the last thing we should do. We can hypothesise until the day we die yet it won't change the truth even if we don't really want to believe there is one. We can try and be another Peter Pan and pretend that we are not getting older and that life in the main is for others, but it isn't, we are part of getting old and life does zoom by even if our Dorian Grey attitude temporarily makes us feel better. At some stage everything comes home to roost and at some stage we look upon life and not see what we have done but where are we now, for that is where we live and breath.

For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
FREE "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com
John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012