THE FUN AND JOY IN LIFE

Everything in life is a matter of balance, it's also a culmination of our take on life too, which incorporates our thoughts, feelings, understanding and those horrible elements negative emotions that include, greed, jealousy, anger, envy, ego, arrogance, you know them all only too well. It's the latter that sets our threshold on how we enjoy life and are able we are to laugh. It's not logic unfortunately that sets the terms even though it should be to a large extent, coupled with a sprinkling of sheer and outright positivity, it's those negative thoughts that wade in and pull us down. We know when we are with friends that we can laugh at almost anything and do, the silliest thing or personal comments about others or whatever it is bodes well for lots of laughter we feel comfortable, ourselves and for a few moments life's stresses and strains fade into insignificance, where they should be. However time goes by and we are soon back on our own pathway and the laughter seems an age away even if only a matter of hours in reality. We come across, financial stresses, work related problems or loss of work, we see outside events that encompass our lives by default, they are not invited but enter anyway, and we see parameters change before our eyes which destabilises us no end.

But over and above all of these things we can laugh, we can enjoy life, we can commune and we can go forward. We are still the masters of our own destiny and if we controlled our thoughts as opposed to letting them control us we would with immediate effect elevate ourselves to a level where life would take on a new meaning and we would see elements and routes and pathways that before eluded us. It's not that all our problems would suddenly vanish but we would be in pole position to life and not a default follower that looks forlorn and withdrawn seeking only highlights to make the bits in between worthwhile. Fun and joy exist every day no matter where you are but if one is to enjoy it all there has to be that conduit to enjoyment that's common to all parties. If someone is not going to laugh at something because they think that the situation that they are in doesn't warrant it then they are forcing unhappiness on themselves. Many people have this pathetic and misplaced thought and ideology that if something is wrong or not going well they can't laugh, or at a funeral they can't smile or indeed laugh even if it's sharing good moments of the past of the deceased, this is a stupid fallacy and self created situation that has neither merit nor logic. And as to the thought "what will others think" whose life are you living yours or theirs? Never bring yourself down or make yourself drab for the sake of others there's no respect or disrespect in that at all it's third world twaddle for low minded people and failures.

The lightness of life the bit that gives us meaning and purpose is akin to being able to see more than one side of anything and that includes any humorous elements or those element within those that work with us. People who can generally laugh are more honest and trustworthy than those that can't or don't, they are more creative and strangely enough more Godly too as they see compassion, love and understanding whereas the morbid zealots see evil and malice as the first point of call. Apart from the devised advertisements where people are made to laugh to try and give credibility, smiling and laughing does give one a better opportunity to connect and be open to connection via others especially strangers who know nothing of or about you. Our "shop window" speaks volumes about us if it's bright and warm then it's attractive to most if it's dull then it attracts the few who are predominantly dull too as the rest take one glance and move onwards. Enjoying the moment is the key to life, if we seek enjoyment via something materialistic which would give us fleeting joy or a situation or happening in the future then we 'postpone happiness' confining ourselves to what we are daily living through as just 'ordinary' and as humans we are anything but, or at least most aren't. Choices abound in life and happiness is a choice (yes it is no muttering here) as is to laugh and smile, it comes from within you and nowhere else, so decide where you want to go and and what you want to be and do it. The way you do it will define where you end up. Now make your choice.    

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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
 (These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others),

LOST THAT LOVING FEELING

Love is an intrinsic part of us as individuals, even for the bad guys it's still a part of them too. It's also true all over the globe including the modern day despots and ever growing religious fanatics who seem to have more of a mental condition than anything else. Love is what makes life bearable and what has sustained mankind throughout time. Man has looked after himself and has grown to where he is today even though there are still primitive tribes thriving in both African, South American and Far Eastern forests. On the whole people like doing things for other people, helping them if lost, caring for them in specialised units, in fact for many helping is a vocation, unlike the finance industry which is heartless and cold. Of course there are exceptions there are those whose mental stance on life has overruled love for the self, gain at all cost, burglary, muggings, sexual offences, greed, selfishness, isolation of humanity and living without thought for others, and so it goes on, and other than mental conditions it's all self contrived. Unsocial behaviour is seen daily in all walks of life including public transport, shopping malls and even on Facebook and other social media sites. It's an act of the self over and above others brought about by unhappiness - and unhappiness manifests itself via many forms.
          
Life affects everyone differently and we go through various stages as time goes by, we encounter problems, situations, events, and our perception of it based upon how we are faring and feeling at any one time. It's good to be loved, it's good to be wanted, to be needed, it's good to love and it's good to care for others that significantly mean something to you other than your partner, such as best friends and very close people who resonate well deep inside of you. Without any of these feelings one is almost alone, and indeed it's often how loneliness is caused by the self, rather than by circumstances. In order to love one has to give, if you can't give you can't receive as it's the same conduit, so if you block it up with self created thoughts then you will by default alienate yourself from love. You'll see and know it's there but you won't be able to either access it or to allow it to touch you and give you that warm feeling which keeps that void deep within at arms length.

There are those who are desperate for love and those that almost have a vocation spending time on "Love and Dating Sites" much of which results in zilch and verges on correspondence between the deceitful and and the fanciful, all matching false identities and building hopes on clouds that pass and are never seen again.  The con artists, the frivolous, the game chasers, those that use the site for pure entertainment, and those who use it to pass the time way. Love is something that never runs out, so the more you give the more it's replenished and thus the more you are a contented bunny, feeling elevated rather than deflated even when life takes a slight tumble. Those that forever extol love as something special that they are saving for the "right" person are to be avoided at all costs as they harbour a high degree of self created selfishness. Love is special but it's also universal and if we adhere to television, the press and other negative outlets then we can generate a degree of paranoia which will eradicate our ability to love.

If life feels low for no real reason or that circumstances are not as they should be or you have isolated yourself and ponder endlessly about it but do nothing then it's a mind stance. It's not that you haven't love within or that love isn't evident it's more to do with accessing situations over and above your love walk, where the mind is set to identifying life bit by bit and love is an adjunct that holds little value in it all. Loneliness is where communing with others has left the individual bereft of that exchange hence many people have pets as they give unconditional love something that few humans can do. There is a definite increase in people feeling lost and almost in a vacuum of nothingness which they can't pin point or put their finger on, yet at the same time one only has to listen to just a few lines of their conversation to understand this mental stand off position. Don't allow the emotions of negativity ever to get the better of you or you will unfortunately suffer by default a degree of lowness and feel that that "Loving Feeling" has left, it hasn't it's just that you've inadvertently side stepped it.

For more www.thelifedoctor.info
Free "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com
©John Rushton / The Life Alchemist 2012