THE END OF THE ROAD

There comes a point in all of our lives when something finishes and something else starts. Sometimes it's a very pleasant thing other times it's quite the opposite. Whatever it is we have to do one thing and that's keep on going, it's what life is all about. It may be a hard truth to bear especially when that end involves a loved one, but life from day one has a cycle and that is birth and death, what we make in between is entirely up to us. We are all different and take things differently, indeed we all look upon things differently too, never the less the commonality in life is that whilst we are alive we have to do the best we can and that all springs from our mind, nowhere else. Our attitude is paramount to living a life full of laughter and mirth and as much camaraderie as possible for without that we are nothing but isolated people living for the sake of it. "Love" is the actual corner stone of life it is what makes us whom we are it's what makes us and our race the one that has lasted the longest and the one that has developed beyond measure to arrive at where it is today. It may indeed not be perfect, yet it has come a long way in development, even though many parts of planet earth still have very backward societies that are parasitic in nature from those that have made the effort and enjoyed the freedom to do so. The religiously controlled societies slowly eating away at themselves offering nothing to society other than unrest and mayhem such is the 'evilness' inbuilt into their belief.

Life and society are permanently evolving, no more so than today where great changes are overtaking the structures that have for so long been the benchmarks for what we do now. An eclipse of time is making our whole rationale look upon where we are and who we are from different perspectives and ironically it's governments that are the slowest to react to this as they see 'vested interests' more important that physically making a difference or introducing a quantum leap in how their strategies are evoked. The "commercial self" is by far a prime contender the actual job is secondary even if at times both appear neck and neck. Unrest and unwarranted dissociation by the state and governments will only add to the already confused electorate as verbalised rhetoric is spewed out manufactured by backroom mandarins colluding and devising hypothetical realities that bear no resemblance to the ability of it being carried out. More unrest will be followed by more unrest until eventually a real statesman will enter the affray and this will happen in many countries as they regain and find their level. Open thinkers also will eventually rule the roost as opposed to intellectual thinkers who do just that intellectualise but little more.

Intelligence and common sense have little in common although it's not beyond reason that many possess both, and occasionally especially in politics it seems it's the few who possess both and their lies always the major problem. The "heart" of any country must be captured by the government and that means like minded souls "thinking alike" and having the ability to "understand" the national feeling as it is and not as some pathetic consultancy has put forward at vast expense and gotten wrong. With feelings and temperaments elevated, as they will constantly be raised as we go forward in the century it's essential that governments and individuals feel that there is a "home turf" that they can emotionally rest upon and not see governments condescending to foreigners and outsiders as if they are a charity and neglecting all else.








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YOU AREN'T ALONE

There's a big difference between being alone and feeling lonely, the former is just that - you are alone, with few or no one around you, the latter is a feeling of isolation even in the midst of friends and loved ones where your inner thoughts are cocooned in a dialogue of their own usually linked to a mind condition or a feeling that things aren't going so well. It could however be that you have "moved on" in life and those around you whilst good people don't offer anymore the support you need and the type of camaraderie you require to enjoy life. It's very easy to be judgmental here but "Feeling Alone" is a very personal thing and it's purely down to the individual as to how they perceive life. Sometimes it's the little things in life that can trip us up the most, like the little stones in our shoes, as small as they are they produce great discomfort and we have to literally stop to remove same. Even when everything appears to be going well, we can feel totally "out of it" to the extent that we go through the motions of life and robotically laugh, join in make arrangements etc, whilst at the same time our minds are literally elsewhere, and our thoughts are churning around discussing life and how we best fit in with it all and that 'elusive' goal of satisfaction and completeness or lack of it.

How we perceive life is down to us, this stays with us throughout the whole of our lives so it's vitally important that we get some semblance of understanding as to who we are, where we are and all that surrounds us. If we have a belief then we already know that God is at hand, for those that don't believe or believe in some weird evil religion then you just winge and moan and still nothing happens. The fact that when we go through an ordeal we do feel alone even if at times we come across others who have or are going through the same thing, there's always a 'let out' clause for them but never yourself, it's this 'self' that holds us back. Very few if any at all are experiencing something unique, even if it's unique to ourselves, it's our 'mind-set' and that mind set can be pivotal as to how we pull through, come through or deal with life and enjoy it all at the other end. Nothing lasts for ever be it good or bad, having said that the median in between can give a rewarding life that's fun and productive and sharing amongst fellow man. Even if we go to the doctors and receive some tablets etc, we receive tablets because somewhere there are 1000's of others needing the same remedial drug for the same problem.

There are various "chat lines" and "blogs" and suchlike that are user friendly and directed towards specific topics where people can openly under a pseudonym pour out their problems to like minded souls and receive correspondence of encouragement and help and advice, and at times this can be the best help around. Often knowing that you are not alone can be so elevating that the severity of the problem can be almost halved in a split second. Whether we have a secret fetish, secret desires or feelings which to us are "all out of the ordinary" finding that "other" person or persons can make a world of difference and if we seek we will find, although those others we seek will be hiding in the background so diligence is par for the course. We can be our biggest problem, and we are experts at making up excuses for ourselves and why it's always easier for someone else but in "my" case, it's just not possible or too difficult, and so the pathetic trail of excuses goes on and on and on, and nothing gets resolved. One main element of freeing up the self is to detach oneself literally from the public gaze in as much as you neither want nor need comments or opinions of others who know nothing of your plight even if they know you personally, there's always that little something they don't know and everyone should understand that about everyone else.  

Liberating the self is essential, it doesn't mean making public your feelings nor anything else it just means taking charge of whom you are and walking with it, without explanation to others, which at times others who can actually semi-demand to know what you have been up to and if you don't let on they get upset, so let them, boundaries always need to be respected and if their assessment of you changes then so be it, for at times if you acquiesce to their demand you not only lower your own self esteem they may just not understand and walk away anyway, you have to judge this yourself. On the other side of the fence you may be in a precarious position whereby you need friends just for emotional support but it's essential that you have the right friends and the right quantity and quality of support for if it's too much either way it can become burdensome and topple all you seek as support. Even in times of dire need when the world looms large and you feel so inconsequential you are not by yourself, there are solutions, ways out and as difficult as it is in such a state making a move is a 100% better than doing nothing. The journey of a hundred miles takes one first step, take that step for yourself in nothing else.

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STABILITY

The major problems affecting people in the West are those associated with the self, that is not material problems but mental scenarios that are difficult for many to get to grips with or come to terms with.  Ironically within our own reality many material things exist on our 'want list' and that in itself creates further mental unrest as we deem materialism as almost essential to us either moving forward or becoming more 'established' or fulfilling our desire to be whatever it is we desire. It can be such a lonely and narrow pathway we create as we build up an image of how we wish to be and present ourselves to the outside world that we lose the reality of what it is that we do best and our own personality. So many people face the possibility of failure because they take the wrong trajectory or tack in life based upon what they think as opposed to what they know and an almost immediate struggle is self created and it need not be so. The dichotomy of life of how we see it and how others see us at the same time walking together to reach our goals is at times so different that if analysed we would not recognise what is taking place and who is doing what either. Such confusion is getting more common as people tend to relinquish ownership of themselves and base it upon a mixture of hypothetical ideals of others, perceptions, incorrect thoughts and following others who they have little idea as to how they made the grade and what they encountered en-route.

Everywhere one goes we are bombarded with sales, concocted ideals, perceived and created realities all drawn up by a collection of thoughts and sales pitches that are designed to pull those insecure heart strings, those excitable areas of potential and the hope of better things to come but very little chance of it ever reaching a glimmer of success as it's all hollow, shallow and grossly insincere. Time lines are the biggest failure areas that people seem to omit in their thinking, what someone did there, then, at that time, with those circumstances, with their parameters, etc, etc, doesn't exist anymore. And whilst their modus operandi is good and solid the detail surrounding it all doesn't exist anymore either, it was all in the past. Such books that purport to give one the clues or steps to success are really a biography of those that have made it and whilst logic prevails throughout the guarantee of it happening to you are minimal at best. Entrepreneurs just "do it", if you need endless motivational tools then your chances are already reduced and whilst motivation is always good it doesn't carry any backup so failure or gross disappointment or worse 'still can't work' with the new learn-ed knowledge because it doesn't quite compute in the mind leaves many frustrated and resigned to falling back on themselves.

Our stability is essential if we are to think clearly, sleep well and face the future no matter what happens. There are no magic wands out there so we have to be realistic as to where we want to go, what we have to accept (which is hard for many as they think they deserve more) and what is the potential again realistically for the future. Striving for a dream is wasting your time and boring those around you. It doesn't mean negating a goal but placing everything in a reality scenario because unless we actively embark upon something it's never ever going to happen. Stability is to do with US and no one else, we can't apportion him, her, this, that, because, they, or anything else, it's all down to us to sort out and not wait for others to change or circumstance to change to suite us, that's pathetic. Placing the onus on areas that we have no control over isn't smart, we have a lot of clout ourselves and ability to alter many things, laziness is the biggest obstacle and thus the "self" is the biggest problem we will ever have to face.
 
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John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012

THE RELATIVITY OF A BETTER LIFE

Life is how it is, situations are as they are, parameters happen to exist, and yet it's all subject to change, life really does evolve even on a small scale, life can change in an instant from bad to worse or from poor to rich, behind the scenes in life events are happening that we know nothing of. We can leave home one day and never return, nothing is irreplaceable nor indestructible, our molecular structure the commonality of the universe and it's perpetual vibration sees to that. How we see life is exactly how it is, it can't be any other way as we create our own reality, no one else thinks in our minds nor does what we have to do, everything that emanates from us is via our thought process nothing more. The way we talk, smile, interact, laugh is definitive of whom we are, alternatively we can be dull, morose, fearful, glum etc, and that too represents what's going on inside. We live and breathe in our own skin and if we thus decide, and we do decide that life isn't good and acquiesce to those thoughts via our feelings then life will be just that. Whatever we think or feel it comes from within, not from circumstances or anything else even if they are dire, how we react thereafter is down to us. And yes when all goes wrong it is difficult to muster up positive energy but the alternative of wallowing in negative energy is just not worth thinking about either. For some "going with the flow" is all too easy a "cop out" that produces a nothingness in their lives which they then perpetually struggle with.

When we are asked how we are we either generically say "I'm fine or I'm good - thank you" for whether we are or not whoever asked us doesn't want a negative answer nor are they equipped to help us and in reality could be worse off than ourselves. Then we have the options, "could be better" or "could be worse" better than what or worse than what we we never qualify, but it's an understood statement and it's quickly dismissed. When making comparisons of ourselves we predominantly do so against those that are seemingly better off than those who are seemingly worse off, in fact we dismiss those worse off as if it's their own fault for being worse off in the first place. It often isn't and people less fortunate than ourselves can actually have better lives in every area as it's a perception and one that they live within far more comfortably. Most people religious or not like to feel they are "spiritual" but haven't a clue as to what being "spiritual" is, which matters not as if you don't know what something is even if you have a general idea, the bottom line is you don't thus live up to a weak perception of it as it doesn't bear any weight within your mind structure. Our background ideals take residence in our speech but rack up not so well in the reality of our daily living.

Our life is interjected with a whole array of stops and starts and wild thoughts and mundane moments and everything in between, it happens to everyone. Some people have very energetic lives others don't. Those that have energetic lives are always full of excitement and vigour and potential, those that don't always seek tiredness and rest as an ongoing excuse to keep alive. Basically it's the body shutting down from boredom and lack of real initiative and an attitude that's completely lax and thus fires up now and then rather than predominantly all the time. Everything in life is relative, relative to what options exist and where we are placed towards those options being realistic events. Often what we seek isn't seeking us and if we don't come to grips with that thought then we are going to end up on a losing trail. If what we seek isn't there for us then we need to create a product that's acceptable and encompasses what we have to offer, such a move then proves ones own mettle and verve.

If we look at our self as an actor on the stage of life and what we are doing no matter how technically accomplished and creative we are and it doesn't resonate with the audience, it could be that the audience isn't up to our advanced display or maybe just plain thick and stupid, then the writing is on the wall. Repositioning ourselves to target what we do best, and then when we get established change it accordingly, which is what many do works well, as then it's got gravitas and pseudo stamina. Ironically those that once turned you down will then have the confidence to like what you do, such is the fickle nature of life and the relativity of it all. Better exists all around us, we choose not to see it often as our narrow and defined views usually prefer to see better as something more grand than what it is hence so many people are permanently not as happy as they should be.   

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John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012