PERMANENTLY SEEKING EMPATHTY

It's a nice feeling to be understood especially if what you are recognised for is part of your personal make up, it's more than being recognised as a person - which is also very nice, but something more specific. We all have within us unique features that make us who we are, that sets us out from the rest, sometimes such features are very similar to others and sometimes they are completely way beyond the majority, which means we think on two different plains. Quite often those in the arts, sciences, strategic thinkers and those who see life differently, i.e. have a mind of their own, (not just opinions on life) fall into categories which at times alienate their thoughts from those of others. Sometimes their thoughts and concepts are so advanced that the every day pedestrian looks at them as weird or cranky or whatever it is they see themselves, often it's a negative reflection of their own lack of understanding. So called "out of the box" thinking can at times be disturbing or even frightening in that the brain cells fire together at multi-levels and come out with concepts and thoughts that exceed those of the average 'common punter'. Even many a large multi-national company falls fowl of it's own "gatekeeper mentality" and rejects exactly what they are looking for or what would greatly be beneficial to them. Different thinking is even beyond that of "Super computers" as their creativity is enhanced extrapolation very little else and at times it needs but one small lateral difference to produce drastic changes to both life itself and perceptions based upon same for the future. Many people like to think they are individuals and some get upset at the thought that others think they aren't!

Being different for some is a way of life and it can be both comfortable and exciting as well as lonely as one may come across those who understand but can't join in, which is the more common approach people find. For some there can be a craving to seek out "like minded souls" just to be able to talk to them and discuss life, the universe and points beyond, leaving mundanity way behind for a brief spell. And for some like the New Age mob who permanently seek the answers to why they can't be happy, healthy, understood and why others think they are weird, and, well - that says it all. And then there are the purely inquisitive who are seeking information but for personal enhancement more than anything else, they just like to know and feel rewarded at times by absorbing great amounts of knowledge based information and using that as a platform to move further onwards. Within the confines of understanding there are those that not only seek others of a similar ilk, they also seek validation a step which often indicates either a lack of self esteem or that they are on the right footing with their thoughts and perceptions but not quite sure, both are different and come from a different place.

We do not need validation or authorisation to be who we are although governments seem to think we do, it helps them control and understand better, but it also erodes freedom and once that is jeopardised you're finished. All today's advances come from free societies not the religiously controlled regimes nor the dictatorial countries which are often both the same. We do not need to be liked by everyone nor loved by everyone basically because we can't cope nor comprehend the statistics that make up the enormous numbers. We do however need to be liked and loved by a chosen few and if others admire us too so much the better but not essential. Our self respect, dignity, self esteem, self value and self worth should be paramount, we are entitled to it, what others think is for them we should never outsource like politicians do our own being for the sake of collecting kudos or we turn into liers as we can't be right to everyone all the time. We may be different, we may be very similar to everyone else, but who we are is us and that's is what makes us marvellous people and not 'designer driven' concepts that will ultimately drive our stability and metal health into a permanent nose dive. What our parents want us to be or anyone else regardless of their 'best intentions' can be counter productive. If there is a real love for anyone then the most you can possible ask is that they are happy regardless, anything more doesn't exist and reverts to selfishness of the self which is not about anyone else but the self.
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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
 (These blogs are read in over 137 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others),

THE RELATIVITY OF A BETTER LIFE

Life is how it is, situations are as they are, parameters happen to exist, and yet it's all subject to change, life really does evolve even on a small scale, life can change in an instant from bad to worse or from poor to rich, behind the scenes in life events are happening that we know nothing of. We can leave home one day and never return, nothing is irreplaceable nor indestructible, our molecular structure the commonality of the universe and it's perpetual vibration sees to that. How we see life is exactly how it is, it can't be any other way as we create our own reality, no one else thinks in our minds nor does what we have to do, everything that emanates from us is via our thought process nothing more. The way we talk, smile, interact, laugh is definitive of whom we are, alternatively we can be dull, morose, fearful, glum etc, and that too represents what's going on inside. We live and breathe in our own skin and if we thus decide, and we do decide that life isn't good and acquiesce to those thoughts via our feelings then life will be just that. Whatever we think or feel it comes from within, not from circumstances or anything else even if they are dire, how we react thereafter is down to us. And yes when all goes wrong it is difficult to muster up positive energy but the alternative of wallowing in negative energy is just not worth thinking about either. For some "going with the flow" is all too easy a "cop out" that produces a nothingness in their lives which they then perpetually struggle with.

When we are asked how we are we either generically say "I'm fine or I'm good - thank you" for whether we are or not whoever asked us doesn't want a negative answer nor are they equipped to help us and in reality could be worse off than ourselves. Then we have the options, "could be better" or "could be worse" better than what or worse than what we we never qualify, but it's an understood statement and it's quickly dismissed. When making comparisons of ourselves we predominantly do so against those that are seemingly better off than those who are seemingly worse off, in fact we dismiss those worse off as if it's their own fault for being worse off in the first place. It often isn't and people less fortunate than ourselves can actually have better lives in every area as it's a perception and one that they live within far more comfortably. Most people religious or not like to feel they are "spiritual" but haven't a clue as to what being "spiritual" is, which matters not as if you don't know what something is even if you have a general idea, the bottom line is you don't thus live up to a weak perception of it as it doesn't bear any weight within your mind structure. Our background ideals take residence in our speech but rack up not so well in the reality of our daily living.

Our life is interjected with a whole array of stops and starts and wild thoughts and mundane moments and everything in between, it happens to everyone. Some people have very energetic lives others don't. Those that have energetic lives are always full of excitement and vigour and potential, those that don't always seek tiredness and rest as an ongoing excuse to keep alive. Basically it's the body shutting down from boredom and lack of real initiative and an attitude that's completely lax and thus fires up now and then rather than predominantly all the time. Everything in life is relative, relative to what options exist and where we are placed towards those options being realistic events. Often what we seek isn't seeking us and if we don't come to grips with that thought then we are going to end up on a losing trail. If what we seek isn't there for us then we need to create a product that's acceptable and encompasses what we have to offer, such a move then proves ones own mettle and verve.

If we look at our self as an actor on the stage of life and what we are doing no matter how technically accomplished and creative we are and it doesn't resonate with the audience, it could be that the audience isn't up to our advanced display or maybe just plain thick and stupid, then the writing is on the wall. Repositioning ourselves to target what we do best, and then when we get established change it accordingly, which is what many do works well, as then it's got gravitas and pseudo stamina. Ironically those that once turned you down will then have the confidence to like what you do, such is the fickle nature of life and the relativity of it all. Better exists all around us, we choose not to see it often as our narrow and defined views usually prefer to see better as something more grand than what it is hence so many people are permanently not as happy as they should be.   

For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
FREE "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com
John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012