STABILITY

The major problems affecting people in the West are those associated with the self, that is not material problems but mental scenarios that are difficult for many to get to grips with or come to terms with.  Ironically within our own reality many material things exist on our 'want list' and that in itself creates further mental unrest as we deem materialism as almost essential to us either moving forward or becoming more 'established' or fulfilling our desire to be whatever it is we desire. It can be such a lonely and narrow pathway we create as we build up an image of how we wish to be and present ourselves to the outside world that we lose the reality of what it is that we do best and our own personality. So many people face the possibility of failure because they take the wrong trajectory or tack in life based upon what they think as opposed to what they know and an almost immediate struggle is self created and it need not be so. The dichotomy of life of how we see it and how others see us at the same time walking together to reach our goals is at times so different that if analysed we would not recognise what is taking place and who is doing what either. Such confusion is getting more common as people tend to relinquish ownership of themselves and base it upon a mixture of hypothetical ideals of others, perceptions, incorrect thoughts and following others who they have little idea as to how they made the grade and what they encountered en-route.

Everywhere one goes we are bombarded with sales, concocted ideals, perceived and created realities all drawn up by a collection of thoughts and sales pitches that are designed to pull those insecure heart strings, those excitable areas of potential and the hope of better things to come but very little chance of it ever reaching a glimmer of success as it's all hollow, shallow and grossly insincere. Time lines are the biggest failure areas that people seem to omit in their thinking, what someone did there, then, at that time, with those circumstances, with their parameters, etc, etc, doesn't exist anymore. And whilst their modus operandi is good and solid the detail surrounding it all doesn't exist anymore either, it was all in the past. Such books that purport to give one the clues or steps to success are really a biography of those that have made it and whilst logic prevails throughout the guarantee of it happening to you are minimal at best. Entrepreneurs just "do it", if you need endless motivational tools then your chances are already reduced and whilst motivation is always good it doesn't carry any backup so failure or gross disappointment or worse 'still can't work' with the new learn-ed knowledge because it doesn't quite compute in the mind leaves many frustrated and resigned to falling back on themselves.

Our stability is essential if we are to think clearly, sleep well and face the future no matter what happens. There are no magic wands out there so we have to be realistic as to where we want to go, what we have to accept (which is hard for many as they think they deserve more) and what is the potential again realistically for the future. Striving for a dream is wasting your time and boring those around you. It doesn't mean negating a goal but placing everything in a reality scenario because unless we actively embark upon something it's never ever going to happen. Stability is to do with US and no one else, we can't apportion him, her, this, that, because, they, or anything else, it's all down to us to sort out and not wait for others to change or circumstance to change to suite us, that's pathetic. Placing the onus on areas that we have no control over isn't smart, we have a lot of clout ourselves and ability to alter many things, laziness is the biggest obstacle and thus the "self" is the biggest problem we will ever have to face.
 
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John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012

BEING DIFFERENT

Let's start from the beginning, we are all different every single one of us on planet earth, even if we appear similar as twins do, we are different. But being different is also a very subjective thing as many people especially the young and vulnerable want to look or emulate someone else or fear that they don't match up.They have a desire to be "the same" for some reason even though they know they can't be ever. There is today a whole culture of "wanting to have" or "needing to have" sections of the public often educationally low, but not always the case, that companies play on to try and secure sales at any cost, and it is at any cost, despite their PR - which is usually a pack of lies. If it's not a pair of costly trainers or perfume / after shave, or a certain brand, then it's an experience from drinking a super alcoholic drink that will not only get you into the mood but elevate life to a level that you can't imagine, which sometimes happens as they ultimately arrive in casualty having their stomachs pumped and lacerations from a fight or a fall. Something which was not on the night outs agenda. And yet at the same time we read in the self same publications that pour out the "must haves" and the "sameness" packages, articles on "individuality" or "dare to be different" and whilst we all understand the commercial nature of such organs one wonders if those that put it all together indulge in eating their own vomit as a way of being different and the same at the same time.

But moving onwards from all of that, for the majority of people individuality and identity only goes so far, they are neither gifted nor blessed with anything wondrous that separates them from anyone else, or if they are they don't do a thing about it which amounts to the same thing. They only veer forward in stages and in controlled moves for fear of "what others will or might say or think" or that they will stand out too much or whatever it is that will identify them over and above everyone else. There's nothing wrong with this stance at all, if it floats your boat fine, if it doesn't but you've ended up there then there is something within you that's held you back. You don't have to be significantly different to be a wonderful mum or dad or a loving person over and above just who you are. A significant number of people actually get frightened by people who are different often wondering what they may or may not do or say or suddenly jump up and enact something that embarrasses them. Then there are the "followers" those that actually like the zaniness of those that are different as it gives them a buzz and feeds into what they lack themselves, often appreciating the zany company and encouraging it for the best of reasons. It takes all sorts to make a world and it takes everyone to do what they have to do and be a part of life's rich pattern and understand same. There's no getting away from the fact that we attract those similar to ourselves or those who we feel comfortable with us even if they are not the same because we appreciate too their inner sincerity.

Whether it's good to be different or not is something else, many in the media literally create "being different" and have a back up flotilla of serfs and hangers on who are paid to inflate whatever they do. But really different people are just that and don't often think themselves as such because they have always been like that, it's just at certain times in life they have the opportunity to "go for it" big time and that enhances and often nourishes their inner being at an opportunity arising. Being different for some can be a nightmare for others it's just par for the course but most people actually like being different even if they are not readily understood or are viewed warily. Communication problems often develop with those deep thinkers and at times are as such viewed as "funny" or a bit eccentric or even a bit of a novelty as there is a loss of mind transference from original thought to the transcended or delivered thought.

Being different often raises points and issues that spring to mind in our current daily lives that others either never see nor feel the need to identify with as the message is either too deep or doesn't have a baring upon how they think in general. Furthermore most people who are "different" to a substantial degree can often see into others thoughts and conversations which can at times unease people as to their minds being read, which is not always the case, but what we say subliminally and don't often realise is that our delivery sets many tones about us and the content of conversation over and above the pure sentence at conversational level. People who are different by nature not by design often can appear slightly "out of it" or "aloof" at times, as if their minds were elsewhere and even appear a little "dippy", which is a relatively common trait, yet totally inoffensive. Being different can also happen as an act of life through injury or illness and similarly ones stance changes as one comes to terms with life from a different perspective and understanding often it actually heightens all previous perspectives and views and levels of compassion. Wherever one resides it makes no difference in that we have to do what we have to do, and that's when we make our mark on life and that's where most people excel, whatever excelling is to each individual.

For more www.thelifedoctor.info
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©John Rushton / The Life Alchemist 2012