GETTING IT RIGHT

There's one thing that really does 'rattle our cage' and that's when stuff goes wrong. It's so gratifying when our plans or circumstances fall into place it not only makes us feel good we even have a different perspective on life and the world. It's a mixture of compassion, elevation and greater understanding of all that's around us, but boy does it vanish when it all collides and goes awry. In reality it's only our mind that makes us think that way because things are as they are whatever happens the good, the bad and the indifferent, it's all processed by the self same computer - our mind. When we try to get it right it's because we have taken care and hopefully paid attention to what we are doing, so if it goes wrong we should have some idea as to how best to rectify it or pull it all together even if that is not really a very palatable idea. Overcoming disappointment is what most people tend to fall down upon, allowing the negativity of the situation to swirl around in the mind and then feeling sorry and wanting a degree of self compassion makes it even worse. The feeling that one gets in the pit of the stomach adds to the drama of it all, the mind searching for those seemingly illusive elements that we hopefully can latch upon to bring it all around again and make us feel as if nothing has happened, but it has.

It's so important to live your life with a feeling of contentment within and a feeling that you can also 'let go' when necessary too. It doesn't mean that life has to be fabulous and full of the riches that one feels that one deserves, but whatever you have and wherever you are and whatever you are going through an acceptance makes the negative values disappear. Mentally struggling takes up thought volume and in turn that narrows the space needed to process creativity, which in turn retards our thoughts, values and perspectives on life which in turn lowers our awareness and that in turn stops us enjoying the best of what's out there. It's a negative vicious circle each element feeding upon each other going round and round at the expense of our happiness, well being, health, all of which is called 'life'. It's important that whatever we do we do our best at for even at times that doesn't even go according to plan, never the less we get full marks for trying, we get nothing for doing nothing and even little more for doing things half heartedly. It's how we process our thoughts that makes a world of difference and it has amazing change properties within us when we are in alignment with ourselves and follow a purpose and direction whatever that it.

Getting it right is the number one aspect of having a correct 'Attitude', for without a correct attitude we not only don't get on well with life but are often ostracised by those around because they see us as not quite responsive or interested in anything but ourselves and our personal / internal thoughts on life and that 'woe is me' attitude then prevails. We need to respect who we are and at the same time not disrespect others which often goes 'hand in hand' , it's this dichotomy that lowers many people's resistance to moving on as they hold on to it and that's needless baggage. A hot air balloon rises when the ballast (the weights) are dropped and thus allows it to move upwards. Similarly life is very much the same in that if we are full of ballast then we will not only not move up we will stagnate and that will cause problems of its own. Moving on is the only way forward as life evolves whether we move in harmony with it or not we will subliminally be dragged along, so e need to end up where approximately we want o be and not just dumped somewhere because we didn't take any ownership of our existence.   


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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012

These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others),

CULTURE AND FAILURE

It's getting more difficult all the time for people to try and relate to something tangible in their lives, it doesn't matter what it is all but without this relationship it's difficult to live an enjoyable life. The number of so called "lost" people is increasing, people who no matter what they do just can't seem to find a niche or position to get themselves into a state of 'happiness'. On the other side of the fence are those who in theory anyway have that niche and it's often their their culture, unfortunately it's a second hand culture and one that's been handed own by parents or grand parents and no longer exists where they currently reside. Whoever you are, wherever you come from one thing is perfectly clear, your culture is where you are right here right now. No matter what your roots or past history if you are born in London or New York or wherever then that is where your culture starts not some idealistic stuff that your parents want you to know about. There is nothing wrong with knowing where your ancestry came from nor any details of that, but you have never experienced it at all and this "in my culture we do this" is not only rubbish it's unpatriotic as to the country in which you live and by default you actually isolate yourself in the process. Don't ever be dragged into someone else's reality no matter how it is. It's similar to the overzealous expectation of children by the parents who say "I only want the best for them" but take no account of what their children want.

We are all different, some people have in their past a string of destinations in which they lived, that too is part of their culture, where you live is the default base even if it's concurrent with others around you so be it.  We need to be at the top of our game no one else's so it's imperative that we are comfortable and have no pressures to conform to abstract areas of life regardless of how nice they may be. Cultures are seen in today's world as an adjunct to identity but only by those who are in the culture loop, for everyone else it doesn't matter, and for all intense and purposes in life it doesn't matter either. Rituals of the past have a habit of causing consternation, dismay, unrest, disharmony, and also family conflicts which is the last thing that should happen, particularly endemic in Asian societies, where status overtakes real family love. It's when selfish parents place their priorities for themselves over the lives of others. Culture often goes hand in hand with "Duty", duty as such can actually cause misplaced loyalties and go against the law or be morally incorrect, especially when enacted in a new or different environment.

We see when we go on holiday or on television travelogues about wonderfully colourful displays of people and their cultures why they do what they do, yet it has nothing to do with the  'now' nor can others be dragged into the scenario. Wrong signals, wrong messages, wrong understanding, wrong everything can ensue if cultures are not kept to the self as something of a choice and not as a duty, etc. Our need to go forward needs some real background substance otherwise we find we are somewhat 'light' as to establishing ourselves. Although many people move to other countries and settle down right away without any troubles what so ever and get on well. The culture of where you are may be alien and it also maybe that you have previously lived in an advanced society that has not been wrapped up or consigned to the dogma of an earlier age, never the less the cultural understanding does have a part to play in your overall perceptions of life and with a better perspective help you overcome or play the games to get what you want.  

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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
(These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others),

SEPARATING OURSELVES FROM CIRCUMSTANCES

We all fall victim at times to circumstances as they temporarily take over our own will and we thus become an alien to oureselves, this can happen when we have a death in the family, made redundant, diagnosed with a serious condition, have financial problems, etc, they affect directly our way of life and hit hard on our emotional stability. Of course we are not all the same and some people seem to worry about everything whereas others seemingly worry about very little and take whatever comes as it is and deal with it accordingly. There's no right or wrong we are who we are and administer areas of our lives the best we can. Sometimes things stagnate or get worse because we are ignorant and fail to seek help or assistance or advice which is what many do to their detriment. Ego, pride, self smugness etc, tends to creep in and we scorn knowledge that others may have built upon in similar circumatances of others and the possibilities that exist to ease the burden or relieve the mental stress that one has swimming around in their heads. Too many people walk around with the "I know best" attitude not knowing that the options thay have have just been negated because of the lack of clarity and forsight of the self. Carrying problems around in one's mind is not smart, it's not respectable, it's not a pennance for anything of the past, it's not necessary, it doesn't change anything, it doesn't promote anything, it doesn't justify anything, it doesn't preserve your identity and deeds, it doesn't help with the future, it doesn't contribute to your friends and family, it doesn't gain sympathy it grates on others as they look upon you as pityful, it's not a prelude to better things in the future, in short despite the severity of whatever it is you harbour it doesn't lead anywhere positive.
Our attitude towards life is paramount to how we live it, it's the base of all of our thoughts and feelings coming together to present whom we are to the world, our "Shop window", and whilst what lies behind that "Shop window" can vary enormously if the shop window looks and is shoddy, you know yourself you'll walk right on by. Whether it's raining, sunny, cold, snowy, etc, we can choose to be happy and bright, if we once start off the day with "Ohhhhh it's raining" then that's predominantly how the day will be and any other aspect related condition we have chosen will allow our feelings to match it. Those that look at the weather, see its raining and accordingly go forward determined to enjoy the day despite those obnoxious people they dislike at work, and missing the bus, and having to put up with the temporary office bercause of refurbishment, and things not being where they should be, and the party they are going to that evening that they are not too excited about, etc, the day is good and bright and yes they can smile and be civil to anyone regardless of how they are to them.

Failure, fear, loneliness, depression, etc, stem from taking hold of the circumstances around us and absorbing them like a sponge, we internalise them not seeing beyond the now and cogitating upon circumstantial aspects of life that could change or alter in a flash or offer solutuions and alternatives that because we don't know of we revert inwardly with a melancholic feeling. Habits and family traits are often a basic cause of this, the tendencies are if our families are negative then we have a chance to be negative too, and the opposite if our families are positive towards life in general then so are we. However, we all have choices and can directly change towards a positive mode should we really want to. Like "Soap TV" everything revolves around trivia or someone else's problems and smallmindedness, for without smallmindedness there wouldn't be a plot. It's one thing to watch such on television but many live in a smallminded arena in life and their lies their downfall and lack of real potential. It's almost failure in the making, with you feeding the ingredients towards it.    

For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
(These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others),

DO OR DIE

You have two choices in life you do or you don't, that accounts for our almost binary coding for decision making, do we or don't we, either way has repercussions and sometimes the 'ripple effect' takes over from such decisions, other times the backlash is minimal and fades into insignificance. Procrastinating veers on the side of NO we don't but it's a bit of a cowardly way out allowing circumstances to take control and then blaming everything and everyone that things aren't as they should be. Today our whole lives and what is around us is changing like never before, well it couldn't change before like it is now because we have never had technology developed to this extent and in ten years time what we have now will literally pale into insignificance. But what is changing and has nothing to do with technology to a large extent it is the human stance in life, and that has market repercussions. There is more corporate greed, dishonesty, subterfuge, deceit than ever before and this is across all sectors, aviation, banking, food stuffs, hardware, local authorities, you name it. And it doesn't stop there the deceit ravages politicians and on a global scale too, plus the underhanded deals and insider information and the proliferation of the rest. All this is not new to Africa and the Middle East where deceit and greed are part of the "rulers" way of life literally, why, because they can do it and get away with it, so it's almost cultural, and where life outside of this is viewed as cheap.

It won't be long now before we have real oil shortages, already there is a physical decline in output because the current massive reserves are past their peak and the development of alternative supplies of fuel are coming on stream faster than anticipated which is due to the hike in oil prices makes now alternatives competitive which not long ago there were not. Once the real dependence on oil starts to wane then the fun begins and the disruption to the Middle East and some African countries will bring home the fact that outside of this commodity which just happens to be there, it's not a technical creation of their own doing, they have absolutely nothing left to offer nor to support themselves. Public unrest world wide is the highest it has ever been and much of this has been caused by whichever party is governing not taking "real" notice of the low ebb reverberation throbbing all around them, so used are they to the old and traditional ways of governing, i.e. "what we say goes" but now finding it not happening. Unrest and mayhem will be something that is more common, not so much strikes but demonstrations pertaining to humanity and how people live and the aloof and pathetic governance of what makes people 'happy' or 'unhappy' as a nation.

Politicians talk the talk only based upon what consultants have fed them and what brief they have read, outside of that many are clueless and staid in their outlook and literally how people commune, work, mingle and access each other via the various strata's in which they live. Statesmen are nearly a thing of the past and global sparring and bickering is bland and dull and does very little for those on home turf. Giving away funds to look good on the international platform for health and education then charging your own people vastly increased tuition fees and giving reduced medical services isn't smart and goes towards the "unhappiness" of a nation greatly, lost in respect and is a part of the mayhem to follow.You wouldn't do this at home so why  do it elsewhere. Like a volcano public pressure builds up until it's released, then the politicians make out they were going to change all along and the opposition say similar stuff but all tell lies to cover their ineptitude, smugness, stupidity and ideas in a world that only they live within. Where National security whilst important has turned into an industry of the paranoid, where once proud nations are frightened of their own shadows. Our choices for a better life are ours via our votes, our actions, our deeds, our works, etc, sitting back is not a positive decision.

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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012



 (These blogs are read in over 137 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others),

ONE SCENE - THREE VIEWS

What truth there is today in what we read or hear varies enormously and how the facts are defined are usually more about who is saying what than the physicality of it as it is all so biased. There are predominantly three types of reporting or stating the facts all carefully designed to reflect the views of who is saying what and how they would like you to think of them. There is the political reporting from a politician, then there is the media reporting and then there is the personal reporting which can also vary enormously depending upon your degree of understanding or how hysterically defined you are yourself. The political view point say to the war in Afghanistan as a point in question is "We are going to overcome Al Queda restore Democracy and give power back to the people allow them to manage their own affairs" etc, which is rubbish as it won't happen in this century in Afghanistan, but that's political rhetoric (even if well meant) living in cookoo land. Then there is the media version on Afghanistan, "To date thousands have died people are without water and electricity is erratic in that the power supplies cannot cope with demand. Life is full of daily suicide bombers causing untold grief and anxiety etc", and so it goes on outlining all that's bad and inhuman which in an Islamic state is not difficult. Then there is the personal delivery and that you make up for yourselves as it can vary and you are a part of that variance and hold opinions yourself even if they are wrong from a total lack of defined knowledge. Most people think they are right based upon very little real understanding, but that's OK we all know that and as you have to live with your opinions that's OK too.

But where does it leave us all, getting so much confused information none of it totally inaccurate but all very biased and contrived. How do we assimilate it all and how far does it go to getting a decent picture of what is really happening, because political statements will veer well away from any negativity, media statements will highlight it, neither will meet in the middle, and the public will say what they want depending upon their pre-formed bias anyway. Life goes on and we have to do what we have to do but the very worst thing that can happen is that we become "armchair experts" like the political marionettes in the television debate programmes, all seemingly holding accredited positions and all constantly not daring to be totally honest for "fear of reprisals" and all getting it consistently wrong. It comes under entertainment so that's what it is. But as individuals we need to understand a degree of real truth, not a truth that harbours elements that is "not spoken about" but a truth that's less biased and covers a cross section of information not a heavily weighted section that is more likely to gain attention, even though like any news today it's all so hyped adding to the drama via their over stated failed Hollywood pros that it is all akin to a fashion of wallpaper rather than what it's meant to be. Where others suffer grief its fodder for the media, it's the basis of a news programme nothing more and one atrocity is moved on to another and then another, without them there wouldn't be any news at all, or it would be good news and that's the last thing stations want.

We can't help but pick up from the ambient wallpaper of the backdrop of life, we are observant to a degree and we have to meld that in with our own life and how if at all it affects us and where we are likely to go. After all we are the masters of our own ship and we have to steer it through a whole range of different tides, weathers and obstacles that are in our lives ahead of us, so it's only expedient that we want as much peace as possible in every area of our lives. And as war costs a load of money it makes the economy less vibrant and produces as a degree of melancholy too as death is almost an inevitable side effect. Our understanding in life is what makes a country what it is, hence Africa and the Middle East are incredibly biased towards a negative life that they bring on much of their own demise especially if it's religiously intertwined, almost the kiss of death itself. The happiness of a nation is reflected in the people, the people reflect their lives and what they know, if what they know is wrong they will in turn give out wrong signals and eventually the gap between right and wrong will cause a disruption that will bring on disharmony. When talking make sure what you say has truth in it an not just an opinion on it as the more you say something the more you will become attached to it and if the subject moves on you won't. Bias is a part of life, make sure that you are not taken in even with what resonates well within you or suites your way of thinking otherwise you'll end up out on a limb and the happiness factor will cease to flow.

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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
 (These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others),

THE WEREWOLF EXPERIENCE

Doesn't it appear today that nothing is exactly what it seems, that adverts selling things tell you how cheap they are then the small print ties you into subscription in order to be able to take advantage of such things. Telecoms companies are like that, disingenuous, greedy and deceitful. Cable companies woo you into what they have to offer yet to really enjoy it you have to almost pay a third or more to get what reaches the satisfactory level of comfort and possible usage. Every commercial company is at it, advertise cheap fares yet unless you can book 20 years in advance and take the first morning trip and come home on the last you are no better off at all. It's all small print and exclusions and omissions and not valid and exceptions and whatever else marketing can find to rip you off and try and call premium packaging to make you believe it's all worth while. Food manufacturers show large pictures of food on boxes and increase the size of their packaging to make you believe you are getting more whereas it's often less so that more profit can be made via the fickle punter. It's becoming dog eat dog in the world markets with the banking system still ploughing their way through customers bank accounts to gain more money for doing less, charging for premium account fees and offering products that are worthless and hardly usable. And all the watch dogs and regulators come up with is the same dull boring hype that means they are spineless and wimpish, fearful and cowardly, despite what they will tell you what they have done to date.

A Werewolf is a wolf but with human thought, it's deceptive and evil. No one likes to get less than they thought or to have bought an airline ticked to find at check-in they have to pay a whole shopping list of fees to move onwards. Whatever we pay for whether it's something cheap and silly or prestigious and expensive we do it for a reason and expect those behind the object or service of our desire to be honest and upright with what they are offering, it has to be "fit for use" and that doesn't include last minute essential costly upgrades nor anything more. We don't want hyped or disingenuous facades that have been processed by immoral people in marketing or those in PR who lie to distort what they have been hired for to make the bad news sound more palatable. It all comes out in the end, and whilst people are at times unfairly judged by their personal deeds as opposed to what fabulous things they did professionally, coming clean at least gains one respect, something that's almost unheard of today.

Having said all of that how do we as individuals fair up in the 'fair up' stakes? Are we whiter than white, blemish free, no faults, exemplary bastions of society, honest to a fault, etc. Because it makes a real difference as to how we move forward and how we both enjoy life and how life treats us. Of course we are humanoid and therefore we do have faults built in already, however we also have self restraint, morality, thoughtfulness, compassion, truth, understanding, love, humanitarian instincts for fellow man, etc, and fortunately most people abide by and large by these facets, not all some professions veer towards others dark areas in their versions of truth, as do some if not most religions. If we are not satisfied we must complain, not as a matter of course or to see what we can possibly 'get out of it' but genuinely and say why and say that you think you have either been "oversold" or "deceived" or what was on offer is beyond what is given, which is common with banks and airlines. (The advertising is ahead of the product). You can make a difference, you have no allegiance to any company despite the fact that thy run customer/consumer programmes, you are a number on a database with statistics no more than that. Human interface between such is rare although it does exist in some companies still. It's all about how you respect yourself, don't go around being aggrieved by being let down, state your case, then move on, it really does work, especially if you contact the media about shoddy service / products.

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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
 (These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others)

LEAVING OLD WAYS BEHIND

Does the past ever come back to haunt you or do you frequently recall events or incidents of the past, or indeed have you got a story of the past that you use frequently to bolster your excuses about life and bore people silly with. Are past and possibly present failures haunting you and causing you to believe that things won't ever get better for you or that what you went through could happen again or for some is still going on? Does at times the future look like the present but just projected towards tomorrow almost a deja vu scenario living today in tomorrows space with nothing more happening other than thoughts, wishes and dreams, because this is common to many, in all areas of life. How we view and perceive life is how life will be, even if deep down our wishes and aspirations and possibly desperate thoughts lean towards a greatness that gets us out of where we are now to somewhere better, but still seems to be spring loaded to keep us firmly entrenched into now. Life is not linear and it's not something confined to paper or text books or anything else, what you are living is not only unique but it will not be repeated ever again by anyone else no matter how  similar it may appear. Your destiny is what it is and you are pivotal to how that unfolds. You are the actor, producer and director of your whole life production and also your worst critic too. You are the chief earner (no matter where your stipend comes from), your own accountant, adviser, social observer and you are your own host, whoever you meet befriend, marry, shack up with you are the one and only one to make those decisions. Even if you choose to follow someone else and it all goes terribly wrong, you did it, you must accept the blame or that responsibility, no answering back you did it! (and no mumbling to yourself either)....

Good things in life come to us all, some know it only too well, and others seemingly feel that they are left out of the loop and when things of a goodly nature do surface as they are so overwhelmed by the 'not so good things' that a feeling of exasperation ensues as opposed to gratitude. But the real crux of all of this is if you want good things to happen you have to create them they just don't arrive on their own. You have to be in it to win it, winning the lottery maybe at great odds against but never buying a ticket ensures one thing - you'll never never win not even the smallest prize. Successful people create an environment to succeed against the odds in many cases many a "nice" person just sits back and complains that they tried a few things and they didn't work and give in at that, big difference in both mentality and ability, and also in forward perceptions too. But what has this got to do with leaving old ways behind, everything, because the old thoughts and ways are rarely updated and not in sufficient quantities to make life different and more optimistic. Resting on your laurels is the worst mistake most people make and thus almost subliminally resign themselves to where they are and although they think they make the odd move forward they don't do anything in the real stakes that's going to make any difference unless by pure chance.

The actuality of life the positive or negative moves are controlled from within, "stuff happens" situations and circumstances change purely because everything has a shelf life and whilst some are short some can be lengthy. In the middle of this we are placed and have available to us a whole wealth of things we can do that will elevate ourselves and almost advertise who we are and where we are for without any degree of self elevation there is no platform to work upon. When there is no platform to work upon the default situation is looking back at the past as it's tangible even though it died a death in the annals of our history. What didn't work then can now, what never transpired then might now, it's what we push for that makes the tumblers turn and the countdown get closer to what we either want or find something even better available that was out of our scope of knowledge or understanding.

Cultures and old traditions may seem cute and colourful and edifying, but many are so out of touch with today's age that they cause real harm and damage and can be even evil in intent as such things were outlawed when time moved on and they didn't. Reminiscing about the past, recalling memories, admiring those that did their best for us in the past to give us what we have now is all admirable stuff. But memories don't build futures, and both should be kept separately in their respective places. Trying to use tradition as a way forward is like regurgitating the past and has not only dire consequences but smacks of narrow minds and real problems ahead, often making them insurmountable because today is where you live not yesterday. It's hard for some to leave the past as it can give comfort yet it's a pure false and hollow scenario as it offers nothing in return and often alienates one from not only their surroundings but the reality of life itself.

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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
(These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others)

THE TIME LINES

Most people regardless of aspirations or desires for their future want to increase their worth as to having things that they would like to have available as opposed to placing them on a "wish list". We are surrounded by a plethora of media and published works depicting how we can achieve anything in life by the purchase of a book or attending a lecture or seminar for a fee. But ah if only it were so easy and so true. If only we had to attend "that" lecture or read "that" book and all would be well, but sadly whilst "that" lecture may be stimulating and "that" book may be gripping reading it very rarely transposes to the attendee or reader. It's not that what was said or confined to paper or our "E" reader isn't true it's just that there is something that is between us and the achievements of those that originated their stance, and it's called a "Time Line".

Life is full of a series of "Time Lines" and in our continuum we face many obstacles that although may be concurrent or parallel in nature to those we seek knowledge from it still has that "Time Line" running between them. How To Make a Million Overnight, Laws of Positive Attraction, How To Bring Success To You, The Laws of Spirituality (whatever those are) the list is endless as are the people who write such things and those that think there is a solution and a "quick fix" out there if only they could just find it. It's often this latter thought process or ideology that "I'm Just Missing Something" that drives people in their hoards to find those saged secrets that have all the answers and from there onwards success is just a matter of time. What is easy for some is just so difficult for others, what comes naturally to some is almost alien to others too, and so it goes on, there isn't a "one size fits all" otherwise such books or lectures would be part of the national curriculum and everybody would be grossly successful.

It may be interesting and indeed informative and to some extent comforting to know what someone had gone through to achieve their success, but that was then, in another time phase, with different circumstances, different people, with different parameters, with different circumstances, with different knowledge, with different thoughts, with different everything even if what you are doing appears almost identical, you are not in that persons shoes in that time. You are right here right now and what was available then isn't of the same order now, it just can't be, although possibly it could even be better now, but it never the less isn't the same and never will be. The bottom line in everyone's success regime is that you have to do it yourself no matter what help you get or advice you get and its got to resonate deep within because if what you are doing isn't inherent then it will be an uphill struggle every day even if what you are doing is you hearts desire.

For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
(These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others)

HAVING AN AFFAIR

The last time I wrote something on the topic "Affairs" I had the highest number of blog hits ever and still it's getting read and still I get correspondence from it. The many years I've been travelling around the world in my professional capacity I have been got at / approached / boldly faced / cornered / set up / asked out to dinner /enticed to pool parties / weekend homes / enticed into situations or just a corner where people have to tell me about the affair they have had or the "fling" that they have had. It weights so heavily that they go to great lengths to want to tell all and at times it's all on for them to stop them telling me the whole gory details, and yes some actually have DVD's of the whole thing too. It was almost a "Father Confessor" role by default which one shudders at. And with modern technology imagination is left uncompromised it's there in all its glory, although it's something I don't need to see to be conversant with what's just happened or indeed still going on. The trails on mobile devises are the foods Divorce Lawyers or newspapers feed upon.  Many people are quite reticent about discussing their story and details but feel that for their sake they just must tell someone otherwise it's too much to bear to live with for the rest of their lives. The bottom line is that over 90% of people who have had an affair have deeply regretted it, and still years after have within them guilt that they either can't shift or just frightened that they will blurt out something pertaining to it and ruin what they have got. I still have thoughts to this day from certain prominent people that "I wish they hadn't told me that", but they did such is their desire to 'cleanse' themselves of the endless thoughts about it all.

There are cultures and ethnic groups that are known for having affairs but then it tells on their culture that it never actually gets very far because of it. Society has "moral values" and regardless of what ones personal opinions are on that subject, it generally makes a great deal of difference when it comes to family life, trust, respect, education, perception by other people and the future generations that have little self esteem as there was none or little in the home life. When that breaks down crime rises in all areas. The biggest trust bond that people ever make as a rule is that when they have a committed relationship, not the one where you just shack up together because you like each other, the sex is great and it's convenient - for a while. It's the committed relationship whereby you love your partner so much you want to spend the rest of your life with him / her regardless of your job or current circumstances. Anything less always leads to less hence many people in the media are born failures where relationships are concerned.

Most affairs start because they can, we are always going to meet someone somewhere at some point in some situation in our lives that's going to raise a sparkle and renew who we were or bring out what was either dormant or possibly thought lost. The heart starts to beat like no tomorrow and the adrenalin and everything else just elevates the whole sensual system in the body including the mind that ones outlook is taken beyond the present to something more palatable even if it's all transient and ends up quite the opposite. Affairs are not just the confines of sluts, lonely people of a certain age or loose morals, they can happen to anyone anytime, even the most sedate person has feelings and at times our whole mind structure is in need of 'something' to enhance from what is to what should be as the self seems almost oblivious of how to affect such a change. Affairs are deceitful there's no getting away from it, it's often not pre-meditated nor is it engineered other than locating a base for the liaison and at times it's not even the sexual conclusion that's the bit that causes the excitement it's actually meeting someone in an almost clandestine way and being able to communicate and importantly laugh which is just so therapeutic. Most affairs start when laughter is no longer an aspect of life, it doesn't mean that love has flown out of the window but real laughter and a sharing of each other has become robotic and that's when those inner stirrings start to rise often subliminally. However you may be the actual cause yourself of your own affair and as to why this situation has arisen so don't jump to conclusions and immediately blame your partner.

We all know the consequences of what an affair can do even if we have never entertained that aspect of life ourselves. Some get over it, some never get over it and some just go on endlessly like headless chickens wandering aimlessly thinking about that 'other' person out there who is better than the current one. Completely selfishly orientated and never able to give of them selves, always holding back for something better which never materialises. But in our world of "all about me" there is no such thing as "they / he / she made me do it", you did it via your own thought process, and there is no back up to justify it whatsoever (if you don't like the relationship get out of it). There are no counsellors, coaches, shrinks or whatever that will properly justify your action to make you feel better. Whatever you have done you have done on your own, the first touch, the first kiss the first moment of sex it was you who did it no one else did it on your behalf. Unless you make a habit of gross infidelity - and some do - then if you don't face up to it you will forever reap the rearing of unsavoury after effects by always being on your guard and it will show when you are nervous or with other people. Your life is in your hands, your partner failures are your judgement not theirs, if you have endless failures YOU are the common denominator in every one no one else. Always looking for something better will guarantee that you'll always be on the edge in life and as soon as the shine starts to dull, that will be your Achilles heal.
(Part 2 to follow - soon)....

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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
(These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others)

FAILURE

Failure is a word that many people shy away from, it's not nice to be classed as a failure, or to have something not go the way it should have thus it's a failure. But failure has been given a bad name by inept people who basically do nothing themselves and these are the real failures. Without failure there would be no success whatsoever, and indeed is failure as designated by the onlookers really failure because many a time when things go wrong it's not failure it's vast experience and understanding of why things didn't quite go right and thus we are now the better and more wiser to both deal with and tackle life and the problems ahead of us. It's just so easy for the armchair experts to exert their dull formulaic logic on to those who have earnestly and dejectedly tried to forge a designed result and not to have met with those expectations. It's thanks to failures that many of us are still alive and kicking today even the critics of those who once seemingly failed yet in that plight sought the real truth and knowledge and ways to overcome and succeed way beyond expectations and often with heightened success at that.

Scientists, pharmacists, engineers often fail almost daily in their lives for years on end trying to find solutions, cures, technological advances, yet persevere they do until that 'ureka' moment comes along and mankind is better all around for that result. Many a business mogul can relate to failure more than once sometimes through no fault or bad judgement of their own, just circumstantial aspects have overtaken all their planning and pushed parameters beyond the potential buffering to withstand it all. So many small business men and women struggle beyond belief in getting their own businesses up and running making at times great sacrifices in order to keep the wheels turning, but like everything else perseverance pays off even if the route at times is more like a ride on the big dipper. The media and the backseat drivers judge the value and worth of those by what they perceive and can see, and fine let them, because the real successes are those who just "go for it" fighting at times against the odds and negative conditions. But as soon as it all changes then what a turnaround, but then your hard earned work pays off as you literally have life in your grasp and not that of those who judge without cause other than to make themselves feel better.

If you've ever hit the buffers running, turned down endless 'dead ends' being pushed by those who know more, looked down upon by the arrogant and egotists, being scorned by your family for not doing what they think, brushed aside by those that haven't a clue what you are doing nor want to know, rest assured that the knowledge you have is just fabulous, in that you have it all over and above everyone else. Even if at times you feel like you are walking in deep mud or swimming against the tide take heart that aircraft always fly against the wind and what a success they are, salmon swim against the currents and survive because of it. You don't have to follow the herd as there are no rules in life everything has its place. Failure isn't an option, it's just a generic term spewed out by those who can't justify an explanation, you know better and that smile that hides the inner tears and struggle is the first sign of overwhelming success, even if you think it's nowhere to be seen. So many people whether in a recession or not are at that 'tipping point' and like seeds in the ground nothing happenes for ages until one day those little green shoots start poking through.

There are no runways in life nor vertical takeoffs either, and whilst it may seem like that for some everyone has to put up with conditions that they never expected and at times some have to start again from scratch. Whatever your dream, goal, endeavour, it's you who are both the backbone and success, and not achieving your goal isn't failure, often what amounts to the end result has so much been modified because of new understandings, opportunities, technology, circumstances, etc, that whatever the result you're a success and failure as it were en-route has made you the ebullient lord of your domain, no one else. Never be put off by others negativity or not reaching what you set out to do, there isn't a company that hasn't had to change tack en-route to survive and accommodate updated circumstances and opportunities. Let nothing put you off the route to where your heart lies, and if one sees in history those that were told that they would never amount to anything, were told by those who had no vision themselves, and one such person told that ended up one President of America.

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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
(These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others)

HELP ME - PLEASE....

It's of no surprise that right now somewhere someone is desperate for help of some kind, it doesn't matter what it is, desperation is the same for everyone regardless of the nature or the severity of the situation. But further down the line there is a degree of desperation that just doesn't quite hit the 'critial list' yet constantly burns away deep inside of us awaiting a solution that's affecting our life. It's the constant gnawing that 'toothache' that's at the back of our mind that's throbbing away and taking the edge of our every day life, making our small choices and decisions seem larger than they should be and bringing our world into a narrower focus that eliminates or excludes what we could really be enjoying. Whether at work or at home, the feeling that there is just something that's preventing life moving to the 'fast lane' weighs heavily and many people are caught up in this scenario, many that on the outside one wouldn't realise nor see nor even anticipate that such problems exist within them as they smile and get along their daily life as if trouble free. Yet deep within the seas of rage battle against the odds and the inner vision of life is anything but that what appears on the outside.

Help is something that many people steer well clear of and even more so bottle up what they have churning around within for fear that others may judge them on what it is that's bothering them.  It's this mixed emotion of being "thought of" by others that also exacerbates the situation greatly as they then feel locked into a scenario that they don't want to discuss their predicament and feel it's either not that great as to get professional help and again that they will be judged by the professional as being weak or stupid or that they should be able to deal with whatever they are going through but still can't. It's such dilemmas that many face daily and at times problems or mind situations come thick and fast that it can at a certain moment be almost inwardly overwhelming and then sleeplessness sets in and irascibility and one gets on a short fuse and the humour levels diminish and so it all gets worse.

Mental health is one of the biggest problem areas in the West, although it's increasing in the developing world and intermediary worlds too such as those religiously controlled areas that have extremely high mental health issues because of it. If the mental health of a nation flounders then everything goes with it, the Arab Spring which will come to very little in the end will be a curse of those that didn't have the courage and strength of conviction to make a clean sweep, resulting in everyone even the victors whoever they may be suffering at their archaic deeds. It's essential that we like our computers get rid of both the unwanted files and the accumulated redundant information otherwise everything slows up and possibly crashes, as humans we can act in that very same mode, although crashing is something we must strive not to do at all costs.

Help is available in many places even if initially we assume that it isn't or we think it isn't because that way it's easier to absolve ourselves from doing anything, yet at the same time we are only putting off the day of eventuality and a high degree of happiness which we are admonishing whilst keeping our problems at the forefront of our minds. Different things effect different people and it's up to us being experts of ourselves to do something about it. It matters not what others think, if they think bad thoughts you don't need them, otherwise they should be compassionate and sympathetic. Help from whatever source one will find that you are not alone and that feeling of embarrassment and
failure and letting yourself down will immediately be eliminated and a feeling of joy, upliftment, strength and new ability will flow immediately within. Often to the effect of "why didn't I do this before" and to know that you are not alone is also so just so emancipating that ones problems are sent into check straight away and a renewed feeling of ability flows through your whole body.

Whatever your situation respect YOURSELF, forget what others whoever they are think, forget about self created stigma, forget about your own embarrassment - as if you are the only one with a problem, forget about what will the professionals think - they have problems too, forget about anything but getting your problems solved whatever they are it matters not, medical, mental, physical, financial, relationship, situational, family, work, bullying, children, stalking, the list is endless if it's causing concern then it needs to be dealt with and you to get back on track as soon as possible. Getting back into the driving seat is far preferable than to be a passenger in your own life, think hard, fast and quickly make a decision that whatever is troubling you long term, not just temporary events, isn't going to be there any longer and make a move to free yourself up to a better and more rewarding life. One thing to beware is that of selfish concern by family members or friends, who are definitely not experts in your problems and will always give stilted, biased, weighted answers towards what they think and have little regard for yourself. Independent advice is on the whole by far the best solution and one where you can be neutral in what you say and think and feel and without reciprocal emotion which is self generated. It's your life, if you can't do it for you  no one can and if you falter then those around you are of no value either as respect and communication just flies out the window.

For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
FREE "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com
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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
(These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others)

NEVER EVER FOOL YOURSELF

There's more deceit and role playing within families of certain cultures and religions that actually defies the reality that they are in fact telling and living lies. They purport to be good and honest and upright citizens whereas they are anything but. They go and pray yet within their own families people don't talk about certain subjects or live "secret" lives so that they can for a brief moment be themselves and enjoy life and still comply with the "Hitler Syndrome" mentality of their two faced parents and other siblings. Such people are weak as are the societies and religions that people fear more than love, where real love, unconditional love sets people free and is the epitome of God in all His glory, not some barbaric person who likes people to suffer or feel hurt or be eternal failures. Of course to some extent every religion has it's judgemental bigoted subscribers and it's whiter than white family members who are almost living a life beyond hypocrisy and could easily be advocates of the Devil himself. Most of the worlds troubles are based upon religions and in fact terrorism is almost the sole entity of one religion only to the tune of 96%. Most of the poverty in the world has inhabitants of one religion, and the biggest failures stem from it too.

It's sometimes easy to feel that one must keep up appearances and to some extent that's also true, no one wants to be with selfish or miserable people as it never gets anywhere and positivity is the only answer to success no matter what you are talking about. If you believe in God then you must know that belief is the ONLY aspect that's going to bring you closer to Him and that it's also the foundation of truth. If you live a facade at home then your religious aspects are nothing but lies and rubbish and an insult to truth. But then it's your life and if you want to go to Hell telling and living lies then so be it, it's no one else's business but yours. However on a better and more upbeat note most people want to enjoy a life free from any facade and pretention they want to be accepted just for whom they are and what love they have within. It's certainly true that those without love deep within are not religious as they continuously judge and whinge and criticise and shun and talk with an air of self proclaimed authority that's hollow, shallow and insincere. Love is the universal aspect of man kind,  take away love and you are almost left with a robot or a drone, something / someone who just lives to live without a purpose, like religious people do. And by religious it doesn't mean those who believe in God, it's those who subscribe to man made religions that are full of flaws and like sheep to slaughter follow blindly, until they are slaughtered too (which is happening already).

Wherever you are you must be yourself, a facade is OK as long as you can keep it up, but in the end it starts to pall, it starts to get to you, it starts to restrict you, it starts to control your mind, it starts to fragment your thoughts and what you would like to do, it starts to cause internal unrest and external distrust, it starts to break your resolve and brings with it little secrets about you and your groups of friends that you keep separate, in short it just shows as a person that you really stink. It takes the edge of off life, it inhibits success, it inhibits progress, it inhibits creativity, it inhibits real friendship and love, it inhibits the self development and real happiness, in short it reduces you to a stupid nerd that can't be themselves yet at the same time can't be anyone else either as that person doesn't exist. One doesn't have to shout from the rooftops about who you are but being who you are is who you are meant to be. And for those whose parents that are so selfish and self centred then what creatures are you living with that have self pride over love and the well being of their children. Life is not always easy but self devised 'make beilieve' is being cruel beyond belief, and where did it stem from and what God subscribes to a lying two faced family?  You have within you to be who you are, so you never have to ever deny that or you are lying again to yourself and those around you.

You have within you everything you need to be happy, successful, truly great and show the natural love within. You have the opportunity to be and do what you will within the law, you don't have to take false ideals, deceit, corrupt ideologies, selfishness. You don't have to be the underdog for those who seek to inflict it because by default they are less human than they wish others to see. You don't have to be substandard to those who are wanting to commandeer your life for their sake because they are neither worthy of it nor have any worth either. You don't have to put up with religions that never ever do anything for you other than make you feel guilty or hear about how evil your God is, despite those around talking of love but never ever showing it. There's NOTHING people fear the most than the truth, it scares the pants of them, it terrifies the weak and pathetic who have nowhere to hide, and it embarrasses those who get caught out to an extent they at times literally can't get over how inhuman they were, but they had their choice and still never took it to make amends. The truth is powerful stuff, use it to your advantage and make those squirm around you, you have nothing to fear but greatness ahead of you. Those who utilise fear and manipulation fall with the biggest bang when exposed as once their facade is exposed they crumble to the rancid dust they really are. Never fear confrontation with the truth against the reality of those who are lying, always make sure others know what you are to say if it's a mighty step as that in itself is enough insurance to make even the high and mighty topple like ice in the mid day sun. You are entitled to your life you are not owned nor the property of anyone else. Your mother carried you because she loved you, if she didn't then you're best without her. Don't ever let anyone emotionally black mail you into not being yourself or getting you to be beholden to them, where love is concerned you are literally free.

For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
(These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others)

LIFE SECURITY

What is the most important thing thing that you need in life outside your health and welfare (and family if you have one)? It's the security and peace of mind that exists around you that promotes 'wellbeing' and a knowledge that whatever you do is going to be as you intended in that someone else hasn't interfered with it or is going to cause harm to yourself or property. However, the problem is getting worse in that there's little done to stop the root cause as  there's only an industry built up on the action of it all happening and what goes on from there. The enclaves in our large cities are well known for crime and the low life dwelling of people who have a poor education, mentality and almost zero outlook on life. The ability of the state to try and re-energise such parts of society is very poor although overburdened with services to help cope with it. Such is our political correctness that it's almost a case where the victim is being blamed for being there for the assailant to have committed the crime. Our whole ethos needs to be radically changed and so does the social structure that almost upholds what is the negativity of the root cause of social decay in society. It's one thing to tax the rich as a statement of income but it's not them who are the parasites on society taking benefits or grants or state handouts, it's quite the opposite. It's those women who have 5, 6, 7 children from equally as many fathers whose children do the same and thus bring more children into the world with almost no hope or chance of success. There are the down and out families that have little or no sense of living that just survive and where education is not of any importance whatsoever, the ghettos of ethnic people - whoever they happen to be, who wallow together in a cesspit of themselves and therefore there is no stimulus nor incentive for any positive growth. Furthermore when you live at the bottom of the pit it's actually quite frightening to move out of as it needs a massive mental change otherwise you take the cesspit mentality with you, hence so many social housing schemes end up as newly built slums.

Our own personal security is yet another aspect of ourselves and one that is vitally important as it has an effect upon the whole of our lives. What are we doing now, what will we be doing and how will we sustain ourselves throughout.  There doesn't have to be a definitive answer to these questions as life is fluid and therefore subject to change even radical change but we can throughout be very positive in that we will be alright and that there is a future and that we will be OK and furthermore happy to boot. That attitude prevails, if we absorb the media detritus of muggins, murders and the like it separates those diffident souls that never do anything and those that forge on regardless and have a far better quality life. There is an "Us and Them" in life, there always has been and there always will be, no matter what the "us and them" happens to be. We don't like everyone in life and not everyone likes us either, so there is by default already a distinction in whom we are and our boundaries. We even in a group of people segregate ourselves or migrate to those that we either feel more comfortable with or have an affinity with or who have more in common with, it's natural.

In communities the good ones are predominantly nice and the bad ones pathetic. The unfortunate aspect of today and many people in the "social strata's" that are involved with socio-economic groups is to try to either bulldozer everything and flatten it down, which never ever works or try to "mix n' match" by putting problem families ' groups in with establish families groups and that rarely works usually invoking resentment, hostility and degradation. It's very important that people don't feel their security is threatened by faceless people somewhere else trying out their own social constructs with people who have worked hard to get where they are and be infiltrated by those who don't care. The degree of social irresponsibility and ineptitude is growing especially as immigration increases and backward cultures tend to reduce an areas social standing by default. The topic of celebrating diversity by the politically correct retards only enhances a lack of unity and even further fragmentation. The overall effect is that ghettos are often created or enclaves and it is an area of newly created environmental problems, religious problems that never previously existed and an overall lowering of standards and of course rising crime, which finds its new home.

Of course security is one thing as is overkill where security actually starts to create its own enveloped intrusion into life and then it's a retrograde step that hinders via paranoia rather than careful and technical design. Where the enjoyment of life is now a brutal step in ones own freedom where originally security was to allow freedom to happen. Where security is almost an entry into Communism where "big brother" is watching you 24/7 and can access every email, text, account, location where you are and what you did or said. And it doesn't end there as once a glitch occurs people are by default denied access to even their own property or accounts having to prove who they are because of a human or electronic mistake in the system and where fraud and electronic organised crime takes on a whole new elevated ball game that's being planned behind all our backs. Before one thinks about security, one must think hard at who is operating that security and do I trust them, including your own government?

For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
FREE "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com
RADIO : www.liferadiointernational.com
©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
(These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others).

PLAYING GOD

The irony and strangeness of religious people is often so baffling one wonders if in fact they are by default devil worshippers in disguise. Religion by its' own hand and merit is flawed, it has to be because it has the creation of man himself in it and as such man is flawed and succumbs to faults, some more than others. As we all know ourselves that over time stories get exaggerated and added to and then one gets zealots and of course corruption of the state and divisive people and before you know it you have rituals and routines that have nothing whatsoever to do with God or indeed anything else. It's all a construct of "charades" or "Chinese whispers" and the unfortunate thing is the congregation follow like lemmings the unscrupulous leaders who enjoy their degree of 'power' and income. All the pomp and ceremony that the Catholic Church goes through and worshipping Mary of all people when Jesus "is the man"  and indeed worshipping goodness knows how many saints and self created idols that are born out from their own arrogant mindsets. It's all like Alice In Wonderland or perhaps The Wizard of Oz as the pope wears the exact same red shoes as Dorothy did. And then we have Islam, where there isn't a stable Islamic country on planet earth, in fact there probably isn't a stable Muslim too as every day in some part of the world some Muslin is killing someone or plotting to kill someone or terrorise someone, where Islam is responsible for over 95% of global terrorism on behalf of their loving God of course, so it's all right to kill in those circumstances I suppose. But if you kill on behalf of God what does the Devil do?

It's not that religions set out to be debased and rank with guilt, fear, repression and the rest but it does serve a purpose for controlling the population and whilst initially it was supposed to preach the 'Love of God' whatever the origination of the God, because Man has a hand in the creation of it it's like digital reproduction in that if there is a fault it will perpetuate and more faults then creep in and so it all starts. Where "blasphemy" in some countries even causes the death penalty to be invoked on behalf of the loving God and words like tolerance, love, freedom, harmony are directed by force so that all comply like robots to a common doctrine so all such countries suffer from a lack of real creativity and thus rely on others countries who develop to sustain them, in fact they are parasites by their own hand. If you believe in God you are his servants NOT representatives, taking God into your own hand is leading to your own "eternal death".

If you are a parent and have children you already know that they when young they are definitely going to disobey you, as indeed you did when you were little, you get annoyed but only for their sake as at times what one did wasn't very good or possibly dangerous. If you believe in God then you must understand that He created the Universe and all that's in it (Let there be Light) and obviously knows all about quantum physics and stuff like that and indeed equations that we don't even know exists, so if we as mere pathetic humans go "off line" at times then He will forgive us as we forgive our children because we love them, and He loves us UNCONDITIONALLY.  God represents "unconditional love" something that humans just can't do, and it's definitely absent in Islam, but many individuals approach that score quite well. Even if our child ends up as a mass murdered and in prison, we can still love them even if at the same time grossly disappointed and dismayed at what has materialised. Many Eastern European / Eastern Asian families don't see love like this for them it's a matter of face, and whatever others think which is stupid but says a lot about their cultures. For societies to take on the onus that blasphemy is punishable by death it begs to raise the issue that their God is in fact weak and can't tolerate such misbehaviour or actions from His own creation, which sounds weird. The more insecure people are the more they have to make noises to try and defend themselves because they in themselves fear that behind what they do is an emptiness and one only has to look at the humanitarian facts to see a pattern of nothingness that has evolved.

Where in places whole country laws have been "made up" on behalf of the individual in the name of God, but this is not only subjective it's totally wrong, as communication with God is between God and the individual NO ONE ELSE.  Such regimes falter and are at the mercy of  perpetual  insecurity both as a country and the people who eventually become paranoid and religiously inane as they believe in what they are taught as opposed to having a belief which brings with it inherent and firm stability, warmth, compassion, freedom and a higher intelligence. There's a big difference between Religious people and those who believe in God. The former are failures whilst the latter are all successes as they believe God is with them 24/7 wherever they are, no pomp or ritual. The litmus test is being shipwrecked on a desert island the religious go to pieces whilst the believers get their strength from God and make it work. How you apportion your thoughts are up to you, politicians can't speak the truth as they talk in words called "politics" and are by definition today weak not like our forefathers who were strong and made bold decisions. If you are strong and your faith is strong it doesn't matter what someone says about you or your God or if they burn your religious book, it's only material paper and print and glue, it's the weak and shallow and resentful and hateful that make a noise because they dare not feel that if all fails failure is what's left. You can't insult God because He loves you unconditionally you can only insult man because man has an ego and failure within.

For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
FREE "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com
RADIO : www.liferadiointernational.com
©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
(These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others).

OVERCOMING ANYTHING

Whatever you think or whatever you apportion to your circumstances or upbringing or race or religion it all boils down to you, you are the one who decides who you are and what you are and not others. It's you who walks in your shoes, it's you who eats sleeps and drinks in your skin, and at the end of the day this happens literally until you die, it's you who is the person who is laid to rest, no one else can ever do that.  The real truth is that if you think you can't you probably won't because you are stacking all the odds against yourself, and if you think you can you have every possibility of doing so. And if you have a chip on your shoulder you'll forever have problems in your life, forever. If for one moment you ever bring yourself down or compare yourself to people of a lesser disposition or lowness then that's by default your Achilles heal that is going to tether yourself to being a lower common denominator within what hope you ever have, even if it's said in jest. Where the mind goes the body follows so it if failure is somewhere amongst your thoughts as a base parameter then that's what is going to be the default thought especially when times get tough or great decisions have to be made. Whatever help or opportunities come your way it's you who will make or break them, it's you who will enjoy the energy of opportunity that exists or turn it in to fear, it's the same energy  it's purely down to how it's used or transmuted. Like Uranium you either make a bomb and blow yourself up or harness it to make nuclear electricity.

Success is not listening to the throng of backseat commentators, it's keeping your own council and surrounding yourself with positively minded people. It's getting into the habit if it's not a natural occurrence to talking positive and not seeing life as 'me and them' as that will further segregate your thoughts as to climbing higher up the ladder. Being reclusive will only furthermore reduce life to something that is lived within the mind and not in the world itself, sharing energy of a positive nature and elevating conversations will introduce conduits and knowledge to further enhance life and give it a strength that otherwise would be missing. It's important to see others 'breaking the mould' as that is an impetus to the self to follow suite in your respective field. Magic wands don't exist, I've looked, but all around us at least for the positively minded are those who know those vital bits of information that we need to 'get on. And what's more (this is the good news) is that if you come across them they will because they will recognise your verve and stealth help you by imparting or assisting your progress. It's their purpose but the key to such people is pure and unadulterated 'positivity' nothing more nothing less, they don't want to hear about past failures they want to know about future success as that's where they want to help you strive to. And for those who are saying "Well I've never met anyone like that" just think that by saying that it's an attitude that already has streaks or self negativity and even arrogance built in. People come across what you do at certain times in life, they do so because what you have already done has planted a root that is now germinating, even if its taken years. Keeping an open mind on your subject opens up many doors and like everything else when the time is right even unbeknown to you or your project / style it all  may need modification to bear fruit, something that might initially go against the grain, but think hard as this could be the one thing that zooms you to success. There's nothing like being staid and unyielding to find success was turned into failure because of ego.

The road to success can be lonely, it can be very isolated and it can be disconcerting at times, but if what you want is that strong it can also be exciting and wondrous and prove incredibly fruitful both emotionally and financially too. Overcoming is a mental concept it's not looking at obstacles and barriers they don't exist, success is finding ways around them all and separates the leaders from the followers. As success nears the road gets narrower then it just opens up to show that wondrous view ahead, and then starts yet another journey, a slightly different one never the less a journey of differing proportions but one which can elevate your thoughts and deeds to levels beyond your previous comprehension. Sometimes we strive at things because of our narrowness of heart and mind, just to try and make something succeed for sheer spite, but from a bigger picture the greater good should always be of paramount importance. Building the house is better than mentally decorating it before it reaches completion. So many people fail because of their narrowness or blinkered attitude, and self indulgent lowness, wallowing in a pity that's akin to losing before you start. If you feel low then your approach and even writing skills will enhance that for others to subliminally pick up. A smile both internally and externally opens up endless possibilities, it shows whatever you are going through that you are not going to be beaten or be put down no matter what. Success is that close as it starts from within.

For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
FREE "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com
RADIO : www.liferadiointernational.com
©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
(These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others).

DEALING WITH THE LIFE YOU'VE GOT

Many people live two lives, the one that they are living currently and an imaginary one that they hypothesise about, the one that's full of "when" and "if" and "at some point" all of which never happens in the way one allows their internal conjecture to materialise. It's full of areas which permits one to be taken out of the 'now' and just temporarily be drawn into a semi-fantasy that consists of an almost "now-plus" scenario with the nice bits added to the present to make it far more enjoyable and perhaps meld with ones ego or degree of arrogance, security in life or even vanity. Whatever it is it is very real to many people especially those striving to make something of their lives, for those that aren't in that situation such thoughts are more possibly residing in the "daydream" scenario. The worse thing that anyone can ever do is to "wish for the future" that something will materialise and then they will catch up and all will be well, well it won't. The only thing that's certain for the future is that it will be there awaiting you, how and what is a totally different matter. The thought process pertaining to this situation is called "Postponing Happiness", in that we strive today for tomorrow.

Dealing with today encompasses every facet of today not just pre-selected areas and thoughts, we live as a totality and as such that brings along with it everything that makes today - today, including happiness, thought, sincerity, fun, warmth, humility, potential and all the rest. Planning ahead doesn't in any shape or form "mothball" the present as if this were the runway for our aircraft to take off for the future. Visionaries are very grounded people they can see from the very place they are possibilities that are literally possibilities or what could be available in the future and the pathway from here to there is part of their ultimate gift, they are not 'cloud heads'. Even if to some their verbiage is a bit "off the planet" that's OK, we don't understand everyone and that's our failing not that of others. If we struggle with the life we have now then we are not magically going to be able to cope with what we wish to happen, if we can't cook, clean, be pleasant now then it's not going to suddenly bestow these abilities tomorrow, even if we employ a cook and a cleaner, we are still redundant souls in those areas. Self "kiddology" is a big let down in life, we don't have to be good at all things and in fact many successful people aren't good at a lot of things other than what they do, but understanding this raises their bar and rounds them up as a competent person hence they make the grade. That's not to say either that many successful people don't have "growing pain" at being able to afford a better lifestyle but don't feel totally comfortable in it.

At times circumstances and situations thrust a degree of weight upon us that we find is almost overbearing and burdensome. Yet that is life and we are all capable of tolerating this weight and dealing with it, as that brings the spring back into our step and makes us far more proficient and ebullient. Dwelling on anything always makes it worse as our minds then turn it into a scenario as it has nothing else to do, no fresh input or additional information so it churns it over and over and by default often allows it to stagnate then it really does become an almost "etched in" problem.  As dull and as boring and as tiresome as the odd daily negative scenario brings to us our positive attitude, if we take away the sighs and moans it makes our task far easier and mentally uplifting in that we then see what we are doing is an accomplishment as opposed to a chore that's got high sides that we have to get over. Life trundles on with or without us, it's what we make of it that makes it enjoyable, and if you have to revert to negative statements as a credential of right now you have almost by default written failure into your future plans.

For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
FREE "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com
RADIO : www.liferadiointernational.com
©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
(These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others).