GETTING CONNECTED

There's a lot written about networking, 6 degrees of separation, who you know, etc, it's the "in thing" today to give everyone instant success. Just read a book, go to a network meeting, join a Business site (and they are popping up like the plague), and the rest will happen naturally. We will meet whoever it is that we need and that "Knight in Shining Armour" will say "You are just the person I've been looking for" and from there onwards it's all history. It's really that simple isn't it, that proverbial person 'out there' just waiting to meet up with us, the answer to why we can't do it alone, that conduit to greatness just a meeting away. Anyway, I must stop dreaming and come back to reality and look coldly at the real people I seem to meet at 'networking events'. No matter who we are and what we do we need people in the chain of life for without them nothing much happens. However what we seek from others, others may seek from us, and that's where in many cases the whole theory of networking no matter what guise it goes under 6 Degrees or whatever comes tumbling down. It doesn't matter what targeted audience one has it's all down to the individual and who they are as people or a person, what their hidden agenda is or what their motives are and how as an individual their characters are.

From the many networking meetings I been to all over the world I've come across the same people, mean, selfish, greedy, insincere, 'wannabies', often quite nice to talk to, but wanting to take but not give, if you can't help me I'm not going to help you, insipid and dull people, those seeking clues about how you do what you do but don't give anything of themselves, those wanting your contacts for themselves but still offer nothing of themselves and so it goes on. And I have to say I have met some fantastic nay fabulous contacts, but like mining diamonds you need to shift hundreds of tons of earth miles below the surface to even get near to the possibility of getting one. I write about the "gatekeepers" in life and those that hold back and retard others but here I must be honest and say I fall fowl of that very same thing and act as a gatekeeper myself, and this is where the 6 Degrees falls short. I do pride myself that if I can help some one I will, no reciprocation necessary, I have been helped tremendously all over the planet by people who have asked nothing of me but just wanted to help me because they could, and I like to follow that line of thought too, and do so to the best of my ability. I like to think that I am cool and level headed and have been through some dire situations been kidnapped, shot at, been on my own in deserts and jungles and still been able to smile and come through each event. But for some reason there are certain types of people at networking events that really raise my blood pressure. And yes I realise it could just be me that finds such events the way they are but it's all very real and at times not only frustrating but a wasted event, coming home with dozens of business cards I never look through ever again.

The human being is such a simple yet complex creature and those seeking are often those who are the most needy and thus formulate an agenda that overtakes their humanitarian instincts and clouds their judgement and that camaraderie of mind, body and soul. The warmth they have is on elastic and whilst openly looks and feels sincere the moment you turn your head it flies back as you are of no use to them. It's not that you can always reciprocate help to those that give you saged advice or knowledge as they may not need what you have got, but it's a matter of instant trust and feel, and if you just don't like someone for whatever reason the chances are you are not going to help them or give them your contact to your best friend or long established business contact that they need because it doesn't rest well within. One thing for sure is that if we don't give we are not going to receive, it will all eventually peter out and we will become so used to being smug that we will live in a concocted world of our own making. To be successful we need others as they need us, we can't be successful just on our own it takes others to both implement what we do and eventually buy our products or services. Our attitude is everything it is our "shop window" to successful contacts and conduits and breaking barriers and getting past the "gatekeepers", but unfortunately for many it's tainted too much about the 'self' and at that point everyone loses interest.      

For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
FREE "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com
RADIO : www.liferadiointernational.com
©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
 (These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others),

MY LIFE - LET ME LIVE IT

We all like to think we are free, then when it suites us we make up stories about why we can't be or because of restrictions or circumstances, but that's a mixture of fear and apathy creeping in to our controlled version of reality. It is a controlled version as we model everything around our ability and not wanting really to venture too far if at all from our 'comfort zone'. It's nice to hold the thought that everything is available to us but we don't really want to venture down the route to get it as it's for most people a step too far. Freedom is relative,  there is always a latitude in freedom and what upsets the apple cart is that of fear itself, in that of allowing others to take control of their lives without being fettered to bureaucracy. i.e. you need permission to do almost anything. It's why the West has ventured further than most countries in terms of technology and creativity and left other areas of the world such as Africa and the Middle East at the bottom of the leagues in terms of innovation and what they give to society. Two extremes one area with relative wealth and the other with relative poverty and between them they contribute nothing as compared to other continents, so engrossed are they in bribery, corruption, bureaucracy, red tape, ministerial / official palm crossing, and so on and so forth. Even in China and India corruption is the biggest culprit to substandard lives and failure more than anything else.

However, where there is a will there is a way, we see around us shops, products, services all created by individuals outside of the major conglomerates. There is within society something that is nearly always sadly lacking in government, entrepreneurial thought. The ability to 'see' without being dragged down into the darkness by that awful word 'politics'. The ability to live life to the full and see values, see needs, see opportunities, and see progress of real value. It's not that governments don't in some areas do a bad job but they are predominantly staffed by inefficient plodders who are at times overburdened with red tape and age old lackadaisical hierarchy that's very very expensive, slow and diffident. The interface between commerce and government at times is like a tsunami itself, where the politicians and bureaucrats feel part of a plan but never be part of it as everything is transient and at times there is more of a collective ownership rather than that of a real leadership lead status.

But even in oppressive countries and religiously controlled countries there remains a degree of freedom, it lies in the underground, it lies in global communication, it lies in leaving the countries for overseas shores which many do, freedom cannot be quashed even when vast amounts of money are needlessly wasted in trying to control freedom and democracy. Nothing that man ever does is without fault, it's impossible as man is by default a creature of faults. But within it all lies that camaraderie of soul and love that makes it all work. Man is a love based creature, take away love and you have a robot or drone, even though a few buck the system for self greed and power the vast majority still subscribe to love for without it even the most creative thinker becomes unstable, as love binds our values and purpose together.

Families and at times educational establishments can actually demote your abilities based purely on their own negativity and personal lack of foresight and some notable examples of people being told when young they would amount to nothing have indeed proved the opposite. So it's very important to follow your own pathway in life and not ramble on aimlessly to those who subscribe to lower aspirations than yourself. Life has a habit of showing you the pathway forward but only if you meet it half way and not from a hypothetical stance but real action and deed. Don't falsely blame what others say about you, or don't falsely blame society or the people around you for being stupid or narrow minded. If you want to break the mould you will by default upset the dull miserable thinkers around you including perhaps your parents that want you to conform for their sake not yours (conditional love syndrome). As soon as success starts to rear its head all will change, but you will be not only wiser but light years ahead in the knowledge of the bigger picture and will see freedom shining through all the cracks that the bureaucrats can't see because of their blindness in seeing beyond tomorrow which is fear based, dark and nothing more.

For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
FREE "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com
RADIO : www.liferadiointernational.com
©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
(These blogs are read in over 120 countries, if you like what you read please re-send them to others)