Friday 20 April 2012


From the moment we are born to the day we die we have something in mind, it doesn't matter what it is but we have something that we would either like to do, happen, have more or less of or see at some juncture. Whatever it is it can vary as time, age, situations and circumstances change as they play a vital part in how we think and vary our perceptions. What we once thought was cool and on our wish list when young leaves us absolutely cold later in life and on recollection we at times wonder how we could even want whatever it was to have happened. During our life we have many an obstacle jump in front of us that throws us into a tangential situation in that we have to change tack or course in order to accommodate our pathway forward and not be browbeaten by the events which have taken place and not stagnate. But being a human being we have already that ability to move forward and stake our claim to both success and a better life ahead, especially in the West even if it's not immediately visible we are aiming for that goal. Our individuality makes life interesting and what one person may want to achieve is of little value to the aspirations of another, there are no wrongs nor rights it's just the way it is and how it is. The common denominator in all of this is achieving and the journey towards the end result, which ironically sometimes keeps on moving and thus our cause is endless, never the less the journey can be in itself just so rewarding and rich as that is where the majority of people spend their time.

Comparisons in life are useless things unless judging a competition as the criteria we all have is different and our threshold levels and aspirations are also different too. Within our remit we have our own individualism and that has a significant part to play in our life and how we live it and how we ultimately enjoy it. The mere fact that we live every day is a success to ourselves in that we do what we have to do to keep ourselves in a relatively stable framework, even if there are those around us who abuse themselves and have no respect for their lives or those of others the important think is we do. Our goals are often subliminal in that we want to build for the future, which is not a goal we set it's an inevitable situation, how we accomplish the bit in between is based on our perceptions, aspirations and a series of fluctuating goals that sometime consume our thoughts and at other times we drop them like a ton of bricks. It's good to have goals or long term aspirations as it gives us a platform upon which to present our case and make decisions. But goals can also get in the way of free thought and opportunities and some people actually get bogged down in forever making goals which causes stress, anxiety and above all many failures as they never attain or reach their goals in the time they allotted for themselves, so we need to be understanding towards ourselves and kind too and not be robots trying to achieve the almost impossible because some book or lecturer says it's the think to do. There are NO "one size fits all" aspects of life no matter where you go.

Victory is in part an attitude of mind, it's not being decorated or to receive public admiration for what you do, that's just a version of public grandeur which means nothing whatsoever, even though some people are worthy of such decorations. The personal understanding of life and that "Victim or Victor" mentality is what makes those who silently fight and stand not giving in to circumstances rather than be the pathetic politically correct nerds who are waste of space and a bane on  society. Everything is relative where some people in Africa walk miles every day just to get water and if those in the West had to do the same thing they would be probably dead by now. Having said that one cannot equate directly such societies as the cause and result of why they are like they are differs so greatly as does the overall humanitarian thoughts behind it all. But success and victory is common to both, it's succeeding beyond the odds, not giving in, overcoming, preparing to respect yourself and not being a statistic of circumstances, it's everything to do with "I've a right to be good and great" whatever that means to yourself. It's not arrogance as it's often just quietly placed in ones mind and thus ones overall attitude is one of understanding, love, strength, compassion, humility, laughter and smiles, and not accepting from anyone what they think you should do or be because it's none of their business.

The difference between success and failure is not determined by others, it's your journey, and whilst everyone may know your name the vast majority have no idea what your journey has been and what you have had to deal with, overcome and do to be just where you are today. It's all too easy for the media to brandish what they think, but the media are cold, impersonal, divisive, greedy and always on the look out for an 'angle' to hone in themselves for what they can get out of it using you as a dispensable pawn. You are not dispensable, success is already a part of your life, the sacrifices that you have made and friendships you have helped and the efforts you have put in over and above what is required already makes you a 'saint' of modern times but without the pomp and public fanfare. Life doesn't get easier, but it can be very livable if we accept that we are successful and it's not down to someone else to tell their version to make it all right, we need to pat ourselves on our own back, smile gently at ourselves in the mirror and whisper -'you've done well', because you have and because you are worth it.

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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
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