Monday 30 January 2012


Relationships, we have loads of them, we specialise throughout our lives developing them, we nurture them, we dissolve them, we seek them and we then wrestle with them when they don't go our way. Our relationships with people are of prime importance to us for if we don't have any or any that are of a significant nature then we become unstable and lose the plot. We become moody, lonely, isolated, develop self mind talk, we become become reclusive and introverted and lazy and then we lose what life is all about because we then can't be bothered to do anything, and then no one wants to know us so it's a downward spiral thereafter. Of course relationships as such are not just of people, they are how we commune with life itself, our work, our various groups of people who we interact with on a regular basis, our environment, and how we see life through the various facets and streams that we utilise in our way forward. Our relationship with our self is important too, it seems funny that we talk about our self relationship but it isn't that funny when you think or know yourself better than anyone, so it's imperative that we don't fool or lie to ourselves. If we have a lack of self confidence or are not trustworthy that's how we work our way in life and at some point it will have negative consequences for the acts and deeds we have done. So we have a relationship with ourselves and almost know what we are going to do and how and how honourable we are or aren't when things don't go well, something others will find out too in the fullness of time.

We have opinions about people and how situations arise, we have our own moral and ethical codes and we have to a degree a level of etiquette too that we expect from others and if by and large it's far from what we expect then more often than not we either dissolve that relationship or if it's a work related situation keep it at arms length and on a minimum contact level. Subliminally we are almost pro-active in whom we associate with and why, and this develops throughout our whole life, as do the opinions of those around us too, life is organic and evolutionary and like it or not we do change and sometimes not for the better. Circumstances can change our lives as can religious elements that seek to cause grief rather then happiness. We also have relationships with people that not only let us down but have it in them to let others down too, for if you do it once you can do it again and again as it becomes as always the easy option in life, something that usually has consequences in latter life that aren't so pleasant. It's at this point that we enter the world of toxic relationships, it's at this point that we meet and see people who are disingenuous and whilst outside are full of smiles on the inside are shallow and insincere. It's at this point we see others from afar who are cold, selfish, self centred and hollow, those that think only about themselves and have ulterior motives for control such as is happening in the Middle East, a hotch potch of control freaks that will kill at any cost to hold on to what they want and not what the majority want. But it could just well be commercial companies that are not what they be.

We tend to keep the company of those we love and those we like, it makes us feel good and gives us that humanity boost that life is for the main part good. But keeping company with those we don't like or those who deceive us is a toxicity that has real effects that are not that pleasant. Bad relationships / families / organisations / companies / environment can cause the following :- depression, anxiety, mind loss, heart problems, cancer, apathy, raised blood pressure, inflammation, loneliness, and a host of ailments and conditions including a self created degree of dysfunction of the self. Toxic relationships are the "thing" which many of the major world universities are putting out as to the root causes of many problems within ourselves and our immediate environment, and it's only us that can stop the rot. The last thing we need to do is to pass it on to our children which we do as they subliminally take on board what we do and say even if they haven't a clue as to what our actions are, it seeps through the net something that's inherent in our deeds and actions.

Bad managers, bad friends, wrong crowd, poor environment, inadequate policing, wrong choices, double standards, etc contribute to toxic relationships all of which defines what we say and how we say it. Even if we are not aware of it we shape our future criteria on what we do now, and what we think we can get away with has future complications which often our own arrogance puts to one side as irrelevant, but it's still there whether we acknowledge it or not. We don't feel comfortable mixing with people that don't resonate well within us, we can put up with it for short periods of time but on a permanent basis it really gets to us and that has on going consequences and heightens our disdain for that person or people. There is far more toxicity today around us than ever before, and the disappointing thing is is that we have caused it as it doesn't happen on its own or naturally. Even if we don't like other cultures or religions because they don't resonate well with how we think or feel, toxicity is something that has been cultivated and driven from within, and that happens on both sides of the fence nothing is a one way street with people or their ideologies of life.

For more
Free "E" Book :
©John Rushton / The Life Alchemist 2012

No comments:

Post a Comment