Friday, 6 January 2012


You know happiness is becoming a joke in life today, people are viewing happiness as an accessory that they "must have" and "where can I get it from". There are even companies and sad organisations pampering to the thick and stupid and mean and lonely trying to instill or kick start via their eclectic techniques that "happiness gene" which seemingly is not working for them. It's absolutely mind blowing that people feel the need to leave their homes and buy a book or attend a course to try and be happy, what the hell is going on, who are these people who for some reason can't be happy and who on earth are those who think they have an answer other than make a financial return out of others ineptitude. The happiness factor is borne into us, it's there when we are little and know nothing of life other than cry and giggle and have our nappies constantly changed, oh and become hungry then don't want to eat it. It never ever leaves us despite what happens in life, what we go through or what we encounter, so NO excuses from those who opt out and prefer to "outsource" their happiness to others. For those who want to sit back and let other people "do the work" or "talk the talk" about what happiness is all about, so if by chance it doesn't work, which it rarely lasts very long, the book or course can be blamed as it not materialising as it should. And here lies the whole bottom line of why many people are not happy, it's because they have placed so much of themselves and selfishness upon what the credentials of "what happiness should be" that they will never attain it, in this life or the next. Of course the "happiness factor" changes as time marches on and the majority of people who buy such books and attend such courses are usually 30+, single and predominantly women or if younger have great "issues" that are self created, it's nothing to do with happiness what so ever.

Happiness is contagious, happy people tend to migrate towards other happy people whereas the miserable Jobs comforters migrate towards the unhappy people, the "emotional vampires" that drag along more baggage that a jumbo jet and en-route accumulate even more because it becomes a way of life, it's their raison d'etre, they almost get hooked on to negativity which has far reaching consequences. When one is negatively disposed everything looms large, one can't eradicate what one hears or put it into perspective, the media, the government, crime, finances all play vastly significant parts in what should be the "bigger picture" but are blown out of all proportion. It's this self entrapment that makes life lowly and overrules ones ability to be happy because of the imbalance of thought towards negativity. Anything that's negative is bad, all our negative emotions, greed, pride, envy, avariciousness, hatred, anger, jealousy, like woodworm constantly eat away at our inner self taking the edge off of everything we do.  Eventually it all comes toppling down and many then succumb to depression, stress, anxiety and a whole host of psychosomatic and niggly little illnesses, rashes, sniffing, coughs, sweating, bowl irritability, lack of concentration and so it goes on. Similarly when negativity is the main thrust of your mind conversation your immune system is slightly impaired and one tends to pick up and suffer from similar problems which then lowers ones mind ability and the 'helter skelter' syndrome then starts up.

We know when happiness is not in evidence for when we meet someone who is unhappy we say straight afterwards either to ourselves or those around us, "they were not very nice" or similar things, we can pick it up, it's a totally different vibe than someone who is predominantly happy but just having an "off" moment because of bad new or dented the car, etc. We carry happiness around 24/7 it doesn't get turned off even when we are facing some degree of crisis. Those that say "if you knew what I'd been through you wouldn't be happy" leave well alone, they have decided that this excuse is a platform for them and unless you want to be a universal social worker - move on. Of course it's good to help people but not at the risk of letting your own self become bogged down in the selfishness of others who will sap every last drop of your energy and whilst they may look glum are deep down enjoying the attention you are giving in fuelling their reserve of negativity . Happy people predominantly speak well of everyone, unhappy people rarely speak of anyone and then grudgingly keep it to a minimum. Happy people always have somewhere to go, not just where they live but other places or inner peace, unhappy people hardly know what any of that is.

It's strange that many negative or lonely people actually think they are "alright" that their void of happiness is like a bad tummy, it will pass, of course it won't because the un-happiness is constantly being self perpetuated and manufactured from within, so one actually makes it worse and becomes very defencive and sensitive to conversations about age, sex, partners, love, enjoyment, or whatever, and one can tell instantly from the quality of the feedback that what is being said is not what is being felt. It's sometimes the negative camaraderie of others in the same boat that they at times feel more comfortable with, yet there is almost always that piece of the "happiness jigsaw" missing and that is the self being free from itself and from contrived aspects of life which like a check list are mentally ticked and if certain criteria isn't matched, happiness is not there. Happiness is there but when one rationalises it you lose the plot straight away, out goes freedom of thought, spontaneity, fun, silliness, out goes the lighter side of life in favour of analysis, out goes giving for no other reason that it's fun and in comes 'what do I get out of it' because the selfish factor has loomed large and reared its ugly head.

If you want to be unhappy and miserable that's just fine, but leave the happy people alone, they don't need your excess baggage, they don't need you to feed off of them, they don't need you as a support guy for your own low life thrills, they don't need your meanness, they don't need your contrived and dull views on life, they don't need the endless sighs and exclamations of woe, they don't need your rambling on about courses on happiness and such like when they are ahead of the game themselves. They don't need a compendium of excuses and hard luck stories, of being let down and it not being fair, they don't need poor old me, they don't need why it's alright for them but not for you, they don't need any of it. If you want to reach old age being lonely and unhappy and predominantly single then so be it, no one can do anything for you other than yourself, you are the only one who thinks in your mind and does your deeds, if you get into a rut then you get into a rut, there are no smart answers and definitely no magic wands, it's your life change it radically for the better but if you don't want to change - fine. For everyone else happiness reigns - no question about it.

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©John Rushton / The Life Alchemist 2012

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