CHERRY PICKING LIFE

We all like to have the best in life it's almost a natural instinct we are selective when we shop and selective about the people we have in our lives too. Within all of that most people have a degree of compassion, love and understanding which allows us to share with others aspects of themselves, the opposite of which is called "selfishness". Similarly in other aspects of our lives we almost veer on the side of "cherry picking" and his includes quite a number of areas within our lives that we take ownership of. One of those areas is religion, if one believes in God then the chances are you are a member of some religious belief as opposed to believing in God directly as all religions are man made and therefore have faults and added bits and pieces. Many like to cherry pick the nice and easy bits to fit in with their lifestyle and understanding and the rest well, tend to allow it to reside at the back of the mind. This tends to actually be the rule of thumb for many in their lives as they tailor aspects of themselves and thus hone more specifically to aspects that concern them or make life easier. 

The problem at times with "cherry picking" life is that it can be habitual and thus we can both live and work in an abridged version of it missing out on various aspects and not acknowledging much of what is needed to give life substance. We can also ride roughshod over others and gradually this will make us appear both aloof and not fully engaged, which will after a time be the case and life will end up as short bursts of 'what I want" at he expense of others values. Whilst here is nothing wrong with looking after No.1 in life (yourself) it can render  the self somewhat incomplete and not having the assistance nor help of others when needed, which at times is essential. No man is an island. Furthermore if "cherry picking" becomes almost second nature then it will have very adverse effects upon any type of relationship whether with a significant other or just friends and associates and possibly communicational skills in general. Like everything in life balance is the key point, we should always be wary of people who constantly "cherry pick" who are around us as you will be always way down the list on their priorities if at all at times and there's no reason that by default knowing this you should allow yourself to be put into such a position.

The opportunities that abound around us are infinitesimal so we rightly need to pick upon both those which suite our purpose and our character too, it's this fine honing that makes life what it is. At the same time we really do need others for if we don't have any significant people in our lives loneliness starts to creep in and that really can be a major problem, and indeed is for many. Psychologically we need to feel needed, loved, wanted and need to feel that we want others even if it's just a "best friend" if we negate all of this then we start to develop psychosomatic feelings which can be very varied and be our downfall with regards mental health  and stability. Having said all of that we can "cherry pick" on behalf of those we like or care for in that we wish them to have the best of what is on offer or available so our deeds of compassion and understanding not only come through but are rewarded by a heightened camaraderie rather than isolation. Everyone makes their own way in life regardless of others, we have to be the masters of our own course and manoeuvre our around whatever is head of us, make sure the journey is wholesome and then enjoy the ride.        

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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
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SPIRITUALITY - IN A NUTSHELL

It's strange what people say about "spirituality" they have their own potted views and thoughts on it yet very few indeed know what it's all about. If you ask someone straight off, "What's Spirituality"? 99% of replies would start with "errrr" instantly trawling their minds for an explanation or something smart to say. And even after some time don't come up with a succinct answer it's usually some kind of waffle even if they get the gist of it right. It's really not however that important that one knows what "spirituality" is all about as it's not going to further your cause in life, but at the same time if one is going to use the word to describe some aspect of life you feel has a degree of importance then one should at least know what it really does infer and that one is on the right lines. The following is a relatively comprehensive dictionary explanation of "Spirituality".

"Spirituality can refer to an ultimate or immaterial reality an inner path enabling a person to discover
the essence of their being; or the “deepest values and meanings by which people live Spiritual practices, including meditation, prayer and contemplation, are intended to develop an individuals inner life; such practices often lead to an experience of connectedness with a larger reality, yielding a more comprehensive self; with other individuals or the human community; with nature or the cosmos; or with the divine realm. Spirituality is often experienced as a source of inspiration or orientation in life. It can encompass belief in immaterial realities or experiences of the immanent or transcendent nature of the world".

Whilst the above may resonate with many people the bottom line with it all is that they "think" spirituality but literally do nothing whatsoever to be spiritual, it just sounds good to mention and an applaudable state to be in. People even talk in soft "spiritual tones" talking about the Universe and Mother Earth and psychic enchantments, they wax lyrical about incantations and a whole load of stuff of past mystical cultures which were so good they've all vanished, and yet these self same so called 'spiritual' people always seem ill and lost in life, never really connecting with anything and are often lonely. It's almost as if many have turned to a "spiritual" route (whatever that is) as a last resort to find a missing piece or fill that eternal void within the pit of their stomach. Whilst there are endless books written on religion, the only books written on "spirituality" and "laws of spirituality" and anything else in the genre are written by current day authors and delving into their past doesn't really bring up the true goods of credibility. And if being on a "spiritual" pathway was that good why aren't millions flocking in sincerity to join and make the world a better place because they aren't. The trouble with "spirituality" is that it's anything you want it to be, it's a great cop out for most people to have the "best of both worlds" do as you want yet when needed spout the rhetoric of the next best thing to God. It's all sad and debased and pathetic really, in fact the irony is that most so called "spiritual" people need more help with their own life stability than those that don't go anywhere near it. People who tend to wax lyrical about "spiritual" stuff are often not the most stable, creative nor fun to be with and many lack any degree of humour, all the stuff than one needs to commune ably with others and life.

Mental health is the biggest problem within the Western World, fortunately it's not the clinical variety but that which has been brought about by the self, it's self inflicted, and the plethora of coaches and psycho-babblers apart from enjoying a good living are really not much better themselves, in fact many are seeking therapy also which is evident from the way they talk and their facial or tonal expressions - (is nothing scared)! We get fat if we over eat, (no one gets fat on fresh air - no excuses), if we feed our minds detritus we get the residual rubbish that's subliminally left, and then we start to be part of the rubbish we have had as a constant diet. Like cholesterol if not treated or dietary controlled it builds up on our arteries, similarly mental rubbish also builds up until at some point we tend to lose the plot, often it's almost too late when that realisation takes place. But back to "spirituality" (it's all linked) if we feign being spiritual because we think it's good, we fool ourselves and indeed let ourselves down. The biggest value we can ever have that keeps us under the best control against everything is "love" for that's the largest common bond on planet earth - and I've been around this planet dozens of times and seen dozens and dozens of cultures and it works in every one. Without love we become drones, with love we become humans, there is a big difference and that's life itself, be a part of it and not dwell on being an alien in your own world (even if you think it sounds good and gives you an instant self created credential).

There are "spiritual" groups all over the place and predominantly filled by single people (usually 30+) or "older couples" all with time on their hands and all seeking "words of wisdom" as if there are "gurus" who hold the key to life and will impart such to them and then "all will be well". There are gurus but not at these meetings, and "no" all will not be well, you have to put something into the equation too, which you are not at the moment hence your own plight. Even more ironic is the "spiritual cloud" which people almost always hide behind and that's the fact that they are unhappy, unfulfilled and need purpose, and their erroneous belief that in wading down the spiritual route it will give them all that is missing in an instant, again it just goes to show how wrong one can be or misinformed. One "becomes" spiritual in the way of thought and conduct, then by default one is automatically enrolled in to the "spiritual pathway". Like everything in life there is an "entrance fee" whatever that is, it's not financial at all it's a deep inner credential and honest and sincere thought with dedication, not the fastidious dedication that leads to dull boring people and fanatics but an overall concept of understanding. Communing with others and life is a good start, if some others don't get on with you fine, just do your bit and it will take shape.

For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
FREE "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com
John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012