Wednesday, 17 November 2010


Two very powerful words that express so much about life, the person we are, our understanding of life and others, the etiquette of getting out and about and communicating proficiently with fellow man, the humility of the self and above all our understanding of ourselves regardless of what others think. It’s important that we know when we are wrong and can admit to it without our ego creeping in or without degrees of arrogance taking over and us making excuses trying to avoid saying sorry. Being sorry and saying thank you can be very liberating indeed, it can free the self up from harbouring deceit and lies and and building a hard and callous interface within that over time will stop us from enjoying life as we should be and it will by default keep others away as they will be able to read the “unfortunate” side of our character and immediately not want to commune with us. Whether being sorry for whatever it is that one is sorry about is not accepted or if so begrudgingly by the other party is not important you can’t tell others what to do or what not to do, their thought patterns are the way they are for a reason. But the fact that one offers sorrow over an action or deed is enough to placate the self even if initially it was of a selfish and divisive nature. Having said all of that saying sorry doesn’t make things alright especially if the deed that one is sorry over was selfish and divisive and it all went wrong, but life is for living and moving on, it’s not from dragging the past with you or harbouring ill thoughts on a permanent basis to try and keep justification for negativity alive and hatred or anger as a live credential for purpose. Such thoughts make the holder of the negative emotions as bad or worse than the one or ones who instigated the wrong doing in the first place.

The human nature of man himself is to show gratitude and in showing gratitude it’s an acceptance of what some one else or others have done or are offering for you. The deeds of individuals or groups of people giving of the service or product play an equally important part in how we communicate with others, life is full of reciprocity it’s this reciprocity that makes the world go around and allows many of us the freedom to interact without let or hindrance by others. Religions in society (man made aspects of God) are the kiss of death as they impart evil and control and censorship and ritual and mayhem and guilt and it’s administered by those who should be preaching love, not the hatred as hate is the keynote of devil worship. Saying thank you denotes the acceptance of human exchange, the giving and taking of something no matter how large or small, it’s the deed or service or product that we are giving thanks for and that gives an elevated feeling of purpose, even if many say thank you almost begrudgingly, which denotes a staid and dull mind of a somewhat selfish nature. Happy and positive people are always profuse with exclamations in life of thanking everyone for whatever they have done no matter how small, they are given thanks. For those who have a grudge or a chip on their shoulders or who think they need more than they have or any other mentally defective thought then is there any wonder why those that don’t have or are envious or prideful aren’t as smart or as outgoing as those that do make a difference.

Politeness is a mild lubricant on life, someone with manners is almost automatically accepted even if not liked for some reason or another, the genuineness of manners is something else but the absence of them stands out a mile. Manners don a quality of the human being and a degree of breeding and the people whom one mixes with, and the company that one keeps overall. The absence of manners denote an ignorance that’s inherent and that one does not know the difference between a person of merit and an ignorant slob. Whether we understand the character or style of one over the other is immaterial, the fact that everyone knows the difference and that people who are usually well mannered in their acceptance of who are do so in relation to others and places the type of person who has such credentials on one side of the fence and the rest on the other. Manners are common to man, wealth or any other trappings are ancillary to what others say or do, it’s that point of contact that one can be honest with any deed or service that has not gone well or has been offered and that the other person or persons in question and reciprocating their acceptance of whatever it is. Even if it’s a thank you or a 'sorry' by proxy it never the less excludes a degree of ongoing implication unless there is some legality adhering to what has been transacted.

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©John Rushton / The Life Alchemist 2010

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