Tuesday, 17 May 2011

THE NEEDLESS COST OF SELF HELP

The "self help" industry is booming, one only has to see the surefit of books and magazines guiding people from where they are to becoming all of a sudden, rich, successful, happier, more stable, more spiritual, more abundant with friends, more comfortable with home life and family, how to deal with this and that, and the list is almost endless. Of course saged words are cast down to paper but by and large none of them have a great workable base otherwise they would be constantly best sellers like "The Bible" or similar such books. Every month or so there is yet another "self help" book superceeded by another "breakthrough" idea that has beeen proven to have made the author at least more wealthy but nothing much more,  infact the authors are still probably finding life as it was before, maybe back on therapy too but more knowledgeable about how to deal with it. The plethora of people who come through some sort of trauma or ordeal and for some reason think they are now experts on humanity and thus decide to write a book so that the rest of the global population can follow suite is amazing, most are women for whatever reason, they often make the headlines then die down into mundanity where they belong. There's no doubt that many are a good read but then so are many fiction books out there too that promise nothing other than what they are - entertainment. The grasp for "something more" for many is always in evidsence, horroscopes, tarrot cards, clairvoyance, rune stones, numerology, reading the tea leaves, palmistry, the list goes on and on, some are so addicted to these forms of divination that they are trapped by their own desire to break free and enjoy a happier life.

There are always good tips and advice to be had in all aspects of life from cooking, gardening, cleaning, travelling, DIY, you name it there are probably books of an informative nature pertaining to whatever it is you want to know, painting and decorationg, car manitainance, stamp collecting, star gazing, potholing, and so on. But when it comes to living life itself it's a whole different ball game, for what good and proper advice may be expedient for one is almost an anathema for another. And what one author wrote about what was pertinent to them, then, in those circumstances, at that time, with their friends / contacts, with those credentials, and so on and so forth, doesn't always hold true with others on a seemingly parallell course. All of us have different criteria and as such do not posses the same clout nor accuracy of implementation, also "time lines" make a world of difference too, and that's rarely ever taken into account. It's all a bit like playing a game at the fair ground, just because you got a "bulls eye" once doesn't mean it will ever happen again. Life is different every day for everyone even if it appears the same, we may appear stagnat to ourselves but decay is etching away at both our bodies and life itself and if we don't make the best of it (no excuses please) then it's down to us, otherwise just learn to live with it and lump it.

The marketing of a better life or potential is all too much for many to resist, thinking that "there must be more to it than this" whatever "this" is, but over 99% of the time how you see life and enjoy it resides totally within your mind, not out of it, and if not being careful that attitiude can be like a "dog chasing its tail", everyhing is where it is and there's nothing more, yet you never get to grasp it even though it's still there. The fickle and stupid are always the first to jump into the mode of wanting to find something better. Then there are the curious, and then there are the despereate ones, those predominantly female over 30, single and worried about that fact. Men also have feelings in the same plane but they often don't dwell on it as much and see it more philosophically than emotionally, there lies a big difference in perception. Looking towards others or magazines for self help whether it's personal or building your empire it matters not, even with saged advice you have to implement it all and that relies on whether you are good at what you do and have the "bottle" to carry on when the going gets rough, or fall by the wayside with endless excuses as to why this and that didn't happen, and of course it is never your fault always circumatances.

Why some make a big deal out of life, finding it hard at every corner to go forward and others seemingly breeze along is completely alien in concept, yet life throws no good nor bad punches towards any of us, life is the way it is and it's up to us to drive our life vehicle as best we can avoiding the potholes, taking the short cuts when available, enjoying the ride and keeping our vehicle well maintained and clean, we cannot do more, although we can do a lot less and suffer from that consequence. We can go to "self motivating" speaches and they are usually relatively good, not designed for entrepreneurs because they are already ahead of the game, but for those who think they can do better and need a push, because they just can't do it themselves. The only thing with self motivation is that when the meeting is over and you go back to your home, everything is as you left it, smell, decoration, look, layout etc, and when you wake up next moring you have to still do whatever you have to do on your own, even if you think whatever it is you want to do is more feasible now than before. Life is all about you as far as what you do, the bigger picture it isn't just about you it's how you commune with all around you and if that difference isn't established then problems will ensue.

Some people are addicted to "self help" either groups or publications, but that is a reflection and a condition of their mental state no more than that because until they come to terms with life and themselves they will forever be on that treadmill. They always have an explanation as to why this n' that is as it is as opposed to those who notice what's around them and move on, not dwelling on either the good, the bad or the indifferent. So many perople would do better just getting on with life rather than seeking a "third party" to try and make sence of their lives or from their point of view bring it all into focus as that will never happen. At the end of the day you still have to walk the walk and talk the talk regardless of what others say or do, and if your "hard wiring" is at fault then you just have to accept that you know the difference and make the right choices based on that knowledge. And for those who talk to the Universe and mother earth and anything else you deem expedient to talk to with your woes, well, everyone else say a little prayer that they get better very quickly.

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©John Rushton / The Life Alchemist 2011