THE WILL TO LET GO

There's a lot spoken about the "will to let go", books describe the cathartic properties of "walking away" or "letting go" or "moving on" and to some extent it's all true. In most cases "letting go" is in reality easier said than done, it's often very hard to "let go" even when somethings aren't doing us any good whatsoever. The saying "better the devil you know is better than the devil you don't" rings true with many people but that always pre-supposes that what they are about to leave and enter into won't be any better, it usually is or the thought of leaving in the first place or moving on wouldn't have emerged. We all need to move on, let go of certain areas of our life, we leave home, get a new job, find a partner, and so it goes on. Familiarity is to some a way of life if not a comfort, routines, traditions, etc, are all very well and good but without modification of time taking place they can turn about face and start to both repress your life and you can actually regress as you tend to be stationary whilst life overtakes you. For most people "letting go" or "moving on" is a momentos task it takes a big change of heart and often dexterity to effect what they need to do and in the process it can affect a number of people who lose their degree of importance and position in life with regards to friendship and 'best friend type' status. By the same token those that make such a forward move often need to cultivate a whole new base for their lives including friends, neighbours, colleagues, associates, attitudes, environment, thoughts, perceptions and ideologies as to a new future from a different base.

There's a big difference between being selfish and doing something for yourself, being a martyr to yourself isn't smart, it's silly and will only bring on eternal regret and possibly hardship too. It's not that we can't or don't or won't give up something to help others especially those close to us but in the bigger picture what we do has a defined action and course that directs us forward. How we go forward is thus also defined by not only our actions but our attitude and our perceptions of life too. We are the only ones who can direct ourselves in life no matter what help we have or opportunities present themselves. Living with regret isn't an option if we do something we should do so with purpose even if it's not exactly what we would like, building up a store house of regrets and excuses is for the feeble minded and those that seek beyond whom they are. To move anywhere in life we must "let go" of where we are otherwise we just won't move, the circumstances of where we are and the parameters of where we live within and the conditions in which we allow ourselves to move alter quite significantly even for those who are predominantly sedentary. If we do nothing life takes us forward by default, so it's imperative that we do something no matter what to both effect a change to our betterment and place our own purpose firmly on the map. Anything less and we start to both lose the plot and become by default drones just wandering aimlessly and then the rot sets in.

Families, friends, relationships, comfort factors, etc weigh heavily when it comes to having to move on for some, for others they see the bigger picture and know that whilst the current status quo may be good and relatively wholesome, the future won't be an extension on the "now" as fragmentation takes place either by design or default and then the "I should have done this ages ago" thoughts spring to mind. There is also that thing called "the love walk" and if life is that good where you are then the love element from both within yourself and others will allow you to move onwards unheeded because with "love" in evidence only the best is good enough and if that means moving on then so be it and no bitterness, jealousy, envy, etc, will be there to tarnish it all. We are all different and what some do to move forward is a step too far for others, there's no wrong nor right in this, it is what it is, but even the very staid get bored in life and that need not happen, although much of what becomes of them is effected by a narrow attitude that does little for anyone let alone themselves. Letting go provides a paving of the way for the future list of unknowns but from a higher more updated stance, it's here that we can excel or find ourselves and allow our various aptitudes to flourish or at least give them a chance to blossom to some degree. Letting go is not always that easy emotionally even though the aspect of going somewhere better resonates well. We have to do what we have to do, but the bottom line is whatever decision you take don't make it rest with an excuse beside it, make it a committment that way you'll feel more secure and useful within.

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©John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2012
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