Wednesday 27 April 2011

WHY CAN'T I BE HAPPY ALL THE TIME?

Happiness is almost on a par with one of today's biggest problematical areas of life, Mental Health, getting to grips with oneself and life and finding an acceptable way forward and purpose so that the "hope trail" is forever refreshed a-new and full of zest for whatever is to come. Unfortunately for many it just doesn't exist and because they can't find within their hearts that effectiveness that makes life feel good for no other reason than they feel good, life at times 'sucks', it's a robotic existence full of potential hope that rarely ever gets realised and in between time ticks on by and old age hits hard without a great deal to talk about. Even those who have had a relatively full life often think "what's it all about" as one can't live on old memories but only what is ahead and when that seems dull one's happiness starts to flank and then the mind plays up. Insecurity looms large and then it's "show time" for the Mind Gremlins, those little creatures that live on our indecision, failure and all things negative. They come out to dance and boogie to everything that's not solid in thought and deed and unless we send them scrurrying back they will eventually take over our thought processes. Happiness for many is something that they know they must work on, we must control our minds and not the other way around. The sceptics, the insecure, the mean, the jealous, the greedy and the negative all have views that happiness is material and that it's fleeting, they believe that happiness isn't something one can possess all the time, hence they rarely display any degree of happiness at all and are often dull and pathetic in nature, although not necessarily bad people by any means, just not the life and soul of living. Scientists often come up with theories of happiness as if reeling off "quantum theory" and that's it, but it isn't. Knowing how something works doesn't necessarily improve the situation. Knowing how a car or aero engine works isn't going to help the ride or the destination at the end of the journey. Knowing the chemical interaction of how cakes bake in the oven will not improve our baking, it's our intrinsic knowledge and feel that makes us good drivers or great cooks as well as aptitude. Knowing why a light bulb glows when switched on doesn't improve the light quality or our experience of the light.

The self help books, new age clans, happy clubs, and all the other organisations that utilise happiness as financial fodder have grown up to serve those unfortunate and often lonely people, usually over 30, single and predominantly women but definitely not exclusively, to try and give them a degree of happiness utilising their own known and 'proven' methods. So successful are the vendors of these intrinsic secrets that the world at large has yet to find out but when they do everyone will be happy regardless. Of course it's pushing it a bit to say that happiness reigns 24/7, but our attitude towards life is something that stems from within so we really do have a degree of control even if at times we get knocked sideways by news that's destabilising. It's far easier to be unhappy because there are no expectations that we need to address, failure, unloved, doesn't happen, rained off, lost out, etc, you can't really get much lower than wallowing in the detritus of sadness. But happiness is a state of mind that we can come to terms with and that we will not be dictated to by circumstances, because being unhappy will not solve nor rectify anything, and even pity and sympathy wears a bit thin by those around us after a while. Other people have a life and it most certainly doesn't include us feeling sorry for ourselves or being morbid. Dwelling on unhappiness for whatever reason is a prime cause to thwart real happiness, like those that dwell on problems never see the solutions because they aren't focused on them so they continually miss out, none of this is rocket science it's mind application.

It's smart to mock today, to throw disbelief upon those that try hard and do well and be happy regardless, to those that give it a go whilst the rest scorn others ways and inflate their own circumstances as if they are the only ones with problems and utilise that famous saying "it's alright for them but in my case" which is a load of old twaddle, it's never alright for anyone else, it's just that they get to grips with it and get it over with. Our attitude in every aspect of life is the key outward element in how we both present ourselves and show how we think too, so if it's out of kilter then so are we. If it's negative then even those who have nothing to do with us will keep away so our chances of successfully communing with life are getting shorter and shorter. Accepting both ownership of our lives and where we are in life is a strength that allows us to define our pathway and make appropriate changes  en-route to suite our personal circumstances. It's this taking the helm of our own ship that makes both humility rise within and fear depart without. It's also the base for us being happy for whom we are and not reflecting circumstances and then deciding that because it's not what we had wished we are therefore going to be miserable, that's not part of the equation anymore. If happiness is a subject in your life then you have to think about whom you are, for by default you will have made it a "carrot and a donkey situation" always that little bit just out of reach, even though it literally resides within you. Happiness is not an adjunct in life, you don't need books, courses, whatever even if these by default take your mind off of dwelling on the subject, by physically seeking happiness short term you might attain a degree or pseudo happiness, but long term it will fade away leaving an even bigger gap or void which many find it difficult if not some impossible to overcome, even though again happiness is still within you. The power of stupidity reigns out there for the fickle to forever play with. Just think happiness over everything and see the routes towards where it lies.

For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
FREE "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com
John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2011

Saturday 23 April 2011

WHERE IS THE L-O-V-E-?

Love is a very emotive word and at the same times it's a very much overrated and abused word. We see Hollywood movies whereby people live and die almost within five minutes of each other supposedly based upon love, it makes good pictorial content but the ethics of same are as redundant as the people who created them. We see and hear the hypocritical words and deeds of religious people who "Kill" in the name of their beloved God, the God they try to tell us is full of love and compassion and greatness, but it sounds in reality more of worshiping the Devil because that's what he is supposed to do. We see families selling their children into slavery and prostitution, we see dictators who supposedly love their country until they get threatened by their own population for not taking care of them and not giving them their freedom then they suddenly turn and kill all those that they are supposedly looking after, such as in the Middle East and Africa. We see families from predominantly the Asian continent still ruling the roost on their own offspring to an extent if they break the mould they disown them or in some circumstances kill them, such is their pathetic love and their totally inhuman and wasted lives. We see robbers and murderers and rapists doing what they do for their own gain. We see Internet fraud and underhand banking deals by the major banks implemented deliberately with finance deals for sheer person gain and greed, and we see insurance companies issues insurance policies that make it almost impossible to claim for such is the small print restrictions, and so it goes on.

Love is both a simple and complex word, love for mankind is what the human race is based upon, for without it we are but droids or robots just living to live. We can't possibly love everyone or even large numbers of people even if we feel compassionate about them because our minds are just not physically capable of such. We can however feel very passionate about individuals or small groups predominantly family groups as we can because of the size and numbers empathise with what plight others might be going through, even if we can't fully grasp the enormity of it all or the exact degree of hurt or feeling involved. God has a bad name today because God is pure love in ANY religion - but religions are man made - i.e. there are bits added by man to the original books of God (regardless of who or what you believe), hence so many interpretations. Many people quote "nice" scriptural verses but they are by and large hypocritical in that whilst it sounds good and indeed often is, it's a statement about them and often covers up their own failures in life and their religion as a whole as opposed to being an expression of fact. God DOESN'T work for the vast amount of global believers because the bottom line is they really don't believe, they go through the motions, they say mostly correct things but the conduit to God is LOVE, and they just don't possess it. Many people hide behind God and say "He'll do this to you" or "God will punish you" or whatever but those are traits of hatred, and unless God told you personally that this or that will happen then you should keep your big mouth shut. Knowing verses about your religious books means nothing, a CD can hold all the knowledge accurately but it won't effect anything, it's what comes from the heart, and some religions suffer the biggest deprivations, repressions, failures, alienation, outmoded structures and debased societies, tyranny, authoritarianism, lack of freedom, etc, and this is not God's will, this is mans own evil deed, it has to be it's people controlling people, we all know who they are it's no big secret. People who defend their respective God(s) are usually those who have fear in their hearts and the fear is that nothing is happening to them that is good, God needs no defence, if He created the Universe then you are of no importance in getting upset about it as it will bring on fear and anger and that's not love. On average "atheists or agnostics" have a happier life than the religious people who forever talk about God and see no positive result, because it's their own fault. Indoctrination is the worst form of education, parrots can recite what they have been taught but haven't a clue what it means.

Love is also evident in our daily lives, something that is very close to us all, it's how we interact with life. We can as some do go around with "anger" in our hearts or we can transcend that (and no excuses why you can't) whilst others have a defined better stance on life even if they are going through trials of their own. Happy people are healthier, they receive more attention in life and people like to help happy people more than unhappy people, the reason being that unhappy people are usually more selfish and ungrateful and thus the reciprocation of love is not in evidence. The general goodness of people  abounds the world over, we all like to think we are "nice" people but in reality many are not. It's not that they are bad people but they have an attitude that is definitely not conducive to getting on well with others or even sharing conversations, unless it's all about them. Our attitude is the outward sign of whom we are, quick to smile, to help, to listen, to understand and not keep "oneself to oneself" as that is not communing with life and it's nothing to do with being shy or reticent it's purely an attitude stance. Loving yourself, which is not the same as having an narcissistic complex is also important because if you can't love yourself you find it difficult to love others and receive their love too. Love as an element in every area of our life enriches it, enhances it and promotes it, it's only when there is an absence of it that one finds a void within that can't be quenched by any other means. It's this void which strikes hard and causes depression, anxiety, desperation and all the negative traits that give rise to unrest and lack of purpose, just surviving isn't a life.

For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
FREE "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com
John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2011
    

Wednesday 20 April 2011

ISOLATION & ABANDONMENT

We read many stories today about the endeavours of others and what they have gone through and how they are now. We see documentaries and news reports of the plight of others and often the miraculous stories that have abounded in coming through with shining colours, and there again we see some who for whatever reason are completely on their own, no help, nothing and yet through their own sheer dexterity they pull through. There is no accounting for what some have to put up with and why some seemingly glide through life without hardly being touched by the brusqueness of life. What we don't see or become privy to are the thousands of people who quietly travail life living at times a degree of "hell on earth", it matters not what it is, nor do we need to compare what's what, the bottom line is whatever we have to go through or endure is very real to us, whether it's worse or not as bad as anyone else's plight, it's still so very real for us. We live in our minds, that's where home is, it's where we make our assessment of life and where we find the courage or lack of it to go forward. Whoever is around us or whatever our circumstances may be, our minds are where it all comes together and our life thus revolves around the resultant thoughts that we eventually come up with. Logic and creativity go hand in hand, logic will get us from A to B, creativity will get us everywhere,so we need to tread a fine line between both so that we can enjoy the best way forward utilising proven routes but not hemming ourselves in because of such either. Stupidity is in a category all of its own and that has the most profound effects upon how we venture forward, our happiness and the the enjoyment and camaraderie of life itself.

Isolation and abandonment can actually start in your own home, it starts statistically in many Asian homes in that way, narrow doctrines, religious bigotry, staid ideas of the past, lack of global knowledge, lack of education, local ego problems, lack of self esteem, inbred fear, etc, etc, and it can start with exactly the same credentials in any other country too including the West. Sexual abuse, violence, drugs, religious extremism, repression, control, not only hinders the growth of  children but can alter their mentality for life. Where in India 600,000 little girls go missing every year, where similar little girls in the Middle East are married off time and time again by unscrupulous two faced Imams for sheer greed (many of whom are in prison now), in Africa the slave trade is still ripe and exists well today, in the Far East little girls and some boys are sold for prostitution, this is the summary of a caring world. And for many women in Islamic countries they are but an "owned" property covered head to toe away from the rest of society never to be able to think or do for themselves for fear of being beaten or bullied. For these Isolation and Abandonment is the only thing they know for many never grow up to ever receive a family of their own or are forced into motherhood as a male right nothing more, they are the forgotten population that just gets by until death by some aspect of life often greatly undignified and destitute. But everything is relative and that doesn't mean one situation is worse than another, even in more civilised societies the feeling that one is out on a limb because those around either don't understand or don't want to is also very real, and it matters not where one is, as it's all in the mind where the battle takes place. We carry around us our troubles, our past and our future, how we react to all those and what we do tomorrow is already being computed and constantly updated even if it's all negative.

How we feed our minds and how we view life, our perceptions of it and our thoughts about whom we are emanate from within our little grey cells,  what others think and say is of little importance as they too are showing the results of their own computations from within and even those who we "think" we need to respect can deep down be so way off the mark. Common sense doesn't automatically equate to education and vice versa, there are so many variables that can if we allow throw us off course and if we are not careful we can take advice from others that whilst sounding good is also shallow, debased and pathetic as well as being totally wrong. Being wrong includes, leaders, prime ministers, statesmen and most definitely religious leaders who are the last people on the planet anyone must trust when it comes to forward planning, vision, humanity, and global welfare, they all fail in this category, in fact are divisive to the point of narrow selfishness. All repressive countries are religiously controlled, there are no other exceptions anywhere on the planet, and none are stable either, not one. Isolation and Abandonment doesn't just happen it's created, and some societies create their own under the auspices of religion, but it's the last thing that God would want, unless you muddle up God with the Devil which many do to suite themselves. There are always solutions, but one must be honest and truthful to make it work, not speak with a forked tongue or be two faced, the solutions are not difficult, it's just people that get in the way.

The recent "uprising" in the Yemen with for the first time women taking a stand against outmoded practises that are neither religious nor legal nor ethical, they are just traditional and subservient, which is why the Yemen is so backward. Yet to see these women hundreds of them all looking like robots dressed head to toe in black, no face, no emotion, no character, nothing all hidden from view because of male oppression and selfishly outmoded idealistic practises. This is modern Abandonment and Isolation perpetrated by those who want it all for themselves, yet it's this dichotomy of life that's holding back development in every area of life that these women for the main are being wasted and denied a life that they have been given. Isolation And  Abandonment still exists in today's society it's not God's world it's partly upheld by religious leaders who are not representing God they are in it for themselves and thus will be rewarded for such. Closer to home even in our own society and major corporations there are those that are ostracised, held back, ring fenced and shunned because of traits that don't hold well with the general populous for one reason or another, and whilst it's imperative that one's "face fits" otherwise disharmony ensues more careful addressing of people is needed to make sure pure rhetoric isn't but a face for the ineptitude of management.

For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
FREE "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com
John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2011

Friday 15 April 2011

GREATNESS IN ALL OF US

At times in our lives we get to a point where we reflect where we are, what we have done and possibly compare what achievements we have made in relation to our aspirations and any other future thoughts that we may hold. Nothing technical nor deep and meaningful or anything like that but a mind summary of how we feel at that moment in time and taking stock of why we feel like we do now. It's not rocket science to know that when life suddenly loses its sparkle we almost automatically fall into a reflective mood, it's quite a natural thing to do otherwise we can't devise new ways forward, re-jig what we are currently doing and possibly seek alternatives or redefine strategies. One of the almost default thoughts that many have is that there are those that are naturally great "whatever definition that one places on greatness - which varies enormously" and themselves, it's almost a dichotomy of "us and them" as if there is a defined distinction between both which somehow "greatness" is bestowed and "non-greatness" is an absence of such. It's all a great fallacy, for today one only has to run naked at a major event get captured by the press and within seconds you are headline material on television, newspapers, chat shows, celebrity cook guests, and the like, plus an article in the weekend supplements, such is the fickleness of today, a No.1 spot without any credentials, no PR, no marketing, no agent, just do it.

However for those of a more modest disposition who can't quite muster discarding all their clothes for the world to see their "au natural" look another avenue of thought has to be entered into and possibly one using what is inherent within, something that is not as hollow, shallow or insincere as many in the media seem to possess as star points. Everyone has greatness within them, many actually live in an aura of greatness and never really know it, some have degrees of greatness that almost permanently lie dormant and others just squander whatever they have and opt for being lazy and selfish. Every action we take has an event that follows no matter how minuscule it may be, small actions like dialling for the emergency services can bring a flotilla of fire, ambulance and police within seconds, so we don't have to do much to effect a change even if that change is somewhat unsavoury. For everyone of us who has reached where they are now, regardless of how they have reached that place they are successful, en-route to that place we will have definitely interacted with others, some helpful some definitely not helpful and possibly officious, but we have survived it all and here we are. Do we view that we are great and not the arrogant variety of greatness but a wholesome version that epitomises humanity and love and camaraderie for fellow human beings or do we think of ourselves a humdrum and nothing of noteworthy incidence to set us apart from an apathetic profile of self persona.

Much of how we allow ourselves to be good and great emanates from our attitude and perceptions of life, it has to no one else controls the way we think and feel. Some have a natural advantage in that they are automatically bubbly and bright regardless of anything that hits them, good or bad. Whereas others have a more controlled approach and literally consider what output to have and at times it's somewhat moribund and negative according to how they feel and their overall displeasure, it's a tone of selfishness, but it's never the less very real. Unfortunately some never allow greatness to become them because they forever place it outside of their control and domain, it's always someone else, or them, or whatever it is, one thing for sure is they don't either accept any part of it or perceive it. We all have greatness within us, many are living proof of who they are and what we have done, credentials for greatness vary and should not be compared nor denigrated from a personal point of view based upon what we think as that could un-align the real value of it all. One should never put oneself down in life or deem how lowly one is respecting yourself is admirable because if you can't respect yourself then no one else will be able to either or at least with verve and strength. Greatness is within allow it be there always.

For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
FREE "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com
John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2011

Tuesday 12 April 2011

ORGANIC VISIONS

Within the corporate stratosphere of ideology and "smart" thoughts there are companies that are making headway, companies that just strive to do better and companies that literally evolve within their own surroundings by design and not like so many companies by default, for which there is a great difference. Of course there isn't a rule of thumb nor is there a yardstick as to what is correct and what isn't, industries vary just so much and the type and style of employee varies enormously, even between product divisions of the same group company and international locations too. What works for some companies and what they boast about can for others almost be the "kiss of death" so we have always to look at the bigger picture even if aspects of governance, methodology and hierarchical structures could well be revised and modified. Structures are just that and one can see with glaring reality the Middle East and the Arab world in general the evolutionary effects that are taking shape from within (although not always wholesome), so it's not just corporations that change it's everything we come into contact with including family structures too.

In life there are those that have abilities to work upon others ideas, develop, enhance, add to, etc, and there are those who just carry out and implement such, and then there are those who at any level have an intuitive ability to 'see' beyond now and allow their focus inherently to give perspectives of life and structures that have profound effects. Some of these "intuitive" people are relatively lowly in terms of hierarchical company organisations and have never utilised their gifts in their lives, whilst there are those who have Honour Degrees in a whole manner of "corporate strategies" and all the ramifications that goes with them and have very low "intuitive abilities" they can really only fire on a high octane fuel delivered by others, that's when they best come into their own - mostly. Where many companies go wrong is that the "need to be seen to be strong and positive" from the top which overwhelms what's going on at the bottom, and then there is always a dichotomy of "us and them". Human Resources coldly say " we are an equal opportunity employer, etc" and all that stuff  and make sure that people quotas are adhered to and that ageism and sexism and whatever aren't issues, etc and suddenly the company becomes bland, dull, pathetic and dictated to by outside sources and not by conditions and circumstances and real opportunities from those that avail themselves from such.

However, it's the bigger picture that matters the most for microcosms have a life architecture of their own and can be dealt with accordingly, the bigger picture has always far reaching implications and it holds the very key as to how both people and the companies move forward. It takes a small pin to bust that proverbial big balloon and similarly it takes very little today in viral terms to spread discontent, unrest, and indeed underhand truths about companies and people from leaked documents etc. Most good ideas stem from very few, even if those "very few" exist mainly in "ideas units" which recommend or devise ways forward. The vast majority of "intuitively thinking people" are just "out there" and will rarely make any contact with any company because of the ever increasing array of "gate keepers" who haven't any ability to "see" what such intuitives have to offer. Most of the successes of intuitives comes literally from "chance" meetings with people who can and do make a difference even if it's based upon others thoughts and strategies. It's the "chance" coming together with people especially in the level of work and product areas they have feelings for that make a great difference. Many people at board level are good businessmen but have myopia as well as a penchant for personal greed wanting to receive as much personal finance as they can just in case the bubble bursts.

The is always a vastness of opportunity in the world for anyone who wishes to tap into it, in fact the vastness is beyond our comprehension for that's only based upon what we know or consider and not the incredibly amount of situations that are there which we don't have a clue about as our knowledge in such areas is yet to be learned. For those with vision the price to be paid for such is exceedingly high, someone somewhere is always seeking an answer, a better way, a radical plan, a new beginning, life for many people and organisations is changing to such an extent that evolution is speeding up which means more ends and more beginnings. It's the new beginnings that need radical thought for without which a version of the old is tantamount to failure before its started, and strong leadership is needed to rally and take the general populous forward, something lacking in the Middle East and sadly elsewhere at this present time, and for example an Arab psyche isn't generally the best for country leadership in a democratic world, it goes against their upbringing and staid old principles.

Organic visions always produce stability, anything else needs a forced enactment to keep it on track otherwise it would falter under its own weight of bureaucracy. Most companies that go to the wall do so because of bad management where finance becomes the biggest single entity and the product becomes almost an adjunct the to board room games played out between themselves and the banks. It's not until at times some companies become insolvent that they begin a re-birth free from the dull pathetic directors who clung onto  the old ways and the advent weak new ones in desperate chance hope of making the grade. Organic vision need entrepreneurs to lead the game, businessmen can do business but in today's environment the style and thought process has changed radically from those of years gone by unfortunately many businessmen haven't. There is a dearth of "public Speakers" and "Corporate Organisations"  advertising their knowledge to turn your company or indeed yourself from where you are now into something amazingly grand, sadly even though they have interesting things to say and back their rhetoric with data sheets by the million if you haven't got that "wow" factor you just end up being more knowledgeable than before and still don't get anywhere. It's the difference between a two people looking into a fridge, one sees food the foodie sees lots of meal potentials. If you aren't the foodie type then you ain't got it.  

For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
FREE "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com
John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2011

Thursday 7 April 2011

LIVING IN THE SLIPSTREAM (The SLIPSTREAM EFFECT)

All through life there are those that do and those that don't, some have relative grandeur thrust upon them for doing little, they just have happen to be in the right place at the right time, others perhaps who have solid and worthy credentials often find the going tough, to say the least, but that's the way it is. There are industries such as the media, fashion, sports, entertainment and such like that have an army of people whose sole responsibility it is to "milk" the potential out of what their clients do, and why not, we all like to get the best from our actions in life. Even multi-national companies try to enhance their remit or stance in life with PR as do politicians. The slightest hint however of a misdemeanor or indiscretion and the vultures are hovering around for a story even if at the end of the day they are wildly economical with the truth and have to run with a rumour, it's often enough to ignite something even if it isn't true, but hey, we are not talking morals here so it's understandable. The "Stock Exchange is based upon rumours about a company whether true or not and 'a run' on a companies stocks are affected globally just on heresay. We even do our own PR by dressing according to how we think we can impress unless of course we don't care, but then that shows too, our actions do have consequences sometimes even to our total detriment. Our attitude yet again plays a vital role in how we move forward and how we communicate in an "effective" way with others as opposed to "just being nice", there is a difference. Our mind talk affects our "attitude" and how we accept the pitfalls and move on or become maudlin and purposefully reticent in further moves is down to us. If we can't laugh at past mistakes then we become useless to ourselves, especially if we relive the bad moments every time we think of them, it means we never let go. If we never let go we never move forward, we can't, we can't climb the ladder if we don't lift and move our feet from the rungs below, we have physically got to do it, not just agree with the notion in our minds.

Those that generate their own charisma, those that take ownership of their life are those that by and large enjoy what they have even if it's not ideal. Those that forever read about others plights or successes or try to follow others other than on a mere informatory note end up with little if not nothing else in life but a gleaned series of stories, nothing more. It's nice to be in the company of successful people, and those that just are at ease with themselves come what may and those that don't feel the need to demonstrate who or what they are as it just exudes from them all around. Whereas the followers always seem to have something to prove or a need to latch on to someone or pick up from someone their 'sparkle' or even worse have a dichotomy of thoughts wanting to be associated with success but at the same time having negative and possible embittered thoughts about the whole thing - unfortunately not uncommon! What we most fear is what controls us, it's what we dwell upon and what we forever regurgitate in our minds and possibly writings too. Those that "don't have" are the most vociferous in the "life's unfair games", holding grudges, always seeing that the 'other man's grass is always greener', always making excuses why others can do it but they can't, and of course no one wants to know because it's just so boring. If you can't say anything nice at all, then shut up, it doesn't do you any good and it places others away from you - if you hadn't found that out already. We are a product of what we say and do, and after a while that product subsumes us and then we become bland and 'old hat', even old products need updating.

We can't afford to live in the 'slipstream' of anyone or anything we have to be us, and that doesn't mean we have to be arrogant or anything else. If some people don't like us that's fine, because we don't like everyone either, and if we come across people time and time again who really don't like us then it says a lot about us more than it does about them. But there are people who will like us and there are those who will love us too, even if we are a bit of an "odd ball", there are plenty of "odd balls" out there seeking other "odd balls", but if you never look then they definitely won't come a knocking on your door, you'll die waiting. You only get out of life what effort you put in, and effort is pertinent effort not necessarily hard work, there is a difference, and all effort must be met with a smile not as a chore, if it's a chore then it really says that your current 'attitude' stinks like mega-time. Life is really "sensitive" to attitude stances, so it pays to be positive even if you feel you want to burst into tears, being positive is the only thing that will keep your ship afloat. Many "social sites" that we belong to and feel are "us" we still need to be ourselves even though any community spirit which we get from those sites may enhance our school of thought. We are just great being who we are, lets make it work for us and not let it be a hindrance, let's do what we can and then we will be who we really are.

For more : www.thelifedoctor.info
FREE "E" Book : www.the-alchemy-of-life.com
John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2011

 

Sunday 3 April 2011

OUR RELATIONSHIPS IN LIFE

From the day we are born to the day we die we have an abundance of relationships with life, life being our environment, people, circumstances, ourselves, our future, our thoughts and feelings and anything else we want to throw into the pot. If we are religious then we have an ethereal relationship also which can have a profound effect upon how we move forward and our stability. It's how we manage those relationships that makes us who we are and gives us the ability to enjoy and understand life. So many people get bogged down in the minutia of life that they never see the bigger picture thus they have no where to go nor to steer to so they just revolve around in a deja vu scenario getting more listless, apathetic and dull and fuelling their negative emotions in the process. Once we allow any degree of negativity to take a predominant part in our thought process all hope flies out of the window and we become jaundiced, tetchy, acerbic, bitchy, irritable, grumpy, disgruntled and all the other pathetic stuff one does to try and feel smart, but of course it's far from smart it's futile and debased. Successful people try to get on with everyone, they make an effort even if they have to force a smile, but they do because they know it really does help both in their own way forward and as a conduit to meeting other people en-route in life that will help them and possibly make new friends in the process. It's not rocket science, it's more of balancing the ego and self determined mind blocks that many put up which hinders their way forward. After all everything we do no matter what starts with a thought in our mind, even if we steal that thought from elsewhere, it's generation of action is what we do ourselves, no one else.

Women's magazines are crammed full of peoples relationship problems, pages in newspapers have an "Agony Aunt" column answering such questions, and there are the "on-line" variety that provide more hyped up commercial smut guaranteed to almost rivet you to your seat as they unravel tawdry events that one hardly new existed or even could exist. The more we become "voyeurs" in life the less significant we become, our morals, ideals, potential fades away into insignificance and our relationship with life becomes infiltrated with other people's ideas and what we have read from the pre-manufactured garbage that we call 'light entertainment'. More people are becoming more confused over the simplest of things, even the basic stance of just living. Minds clouded with degenerate thoughts of what some screwed up celebrity did, or what someone else did none of which has anything to do whatsoever with the reader, even if the situations ran on a parallel course. How we commune with life is essential, it doesn't matter "what our lot is" or how we think of ourselves which could range from illusions of grandeur to gross insecurity and lacking in self esteem, it's often only what we think as opposed to what we know, and their lies a massive difference. What we know is what's going to work, what we think already smacks of endless possibilities of failure. Understanding our life relationship can at times bring to the fore stark realities of where we literally are which can at times be disconcerting, however, understanding that is also liberating too for it gives us a knowledge and strength to change it all. Change can only take place when credentials and circumstances are right and more often than not it's never when we want them, but by diligent thought it does happen, with passive thought you just delude yourself.

We are all different, our attitudes and aptitudes makes us who we are, most of us are definitely not that "one size fits all" type that self help books think they can teach us to be, they can't. We know deeply what we should do but at times it's very difficult indeed to do, however that doesn't mean at all that there are not other and far more palatable options, because there are, and we need to seek them out. Being positive is the very secret to gaining ground, the merest hint of scepticism is like putting sugar on your bacon or salt on your ice cream, it just takes the edge off what you are trying to do, even if the flavour appears interesting. We need to feel as comfortable as possible about who we are and what's around us, even if we are a few pounds overweight or not doing what we want, those are little things in the bigger picture. If we forever dwell on the little things we miss all the bigger things and then all the opportunities and escape routes will zoom past us to those who are more receptive. We need to commune and have a good relationship with life no matter how much more effort we need to put into it than some others might. If a relationship goes sour, and they do for whatever reason, even because of the silliest of things, move on, never dwell on the past. Everything in life has a time scale, a day, month, year, 10 years, etc, the future lies ahead not behind, crying over 'spilt milk' won't clear the mess up.

Every relationship we have be it buying from the store to a new car to meeting strangers in a work environment means we need to use both inherent skills, intuitive skills, a LOT of common sense which seems to be lacking in many, we have to swallow our pride if our contacts don't meet up to our expectations and just get on with being successful and not be a smart Alec that ends up doing nothing and achieving nothing. Our personal relationships need to be tethered between free will and lots of "give and take", and how we make any relationship work is purely down to us, even if at the end we have had enough because our partner just doesn't give an inch, but then why did we enter into such an unknowlegeable realtionship because we thought it would all change? Being moody is confing your relationship within yourself, it's selfish, self centred and shows that one can't trust the other person implicitly as there are always selfish conditions to be applied in order to make them happy - ignore them - their selfishness is not your problem. The end of the day we want to be happy, the best and easiest way possible, make it so. If someone is a relgious fanatic also stay clear they are the devil in disguise.

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John Rushton / The Life Doctor 2011